STAR WARS PARODY
SCRIPT

OPENING CREDITS

SCENE 1: CHAMBER

	MID: DARTH VADER is speaking to LUKE SKYWALKER.

		DARTH VADER
		No... I am your father.

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam yelling at VADER.

		LUKE SKYWALKER
		No! No! That's not true! That's impossible!

		SCORE
		Dark Side Theme

	MID: VADER is speaking to LUKE.

		VADER
		Search your feelings! You know it to be true!

		SCORE
		Dark Side Theme (cont'd)

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam yelling at VADER.

		LUKE
		NOO!!! Noo!!!

	MID: VADER is speaking to LUKE, clenching his fist.

		VADER
		Luke! You can destroy the emperor! He has forseen this! ---

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at VADER.

		VADER
		--- It is your destiny! Join me! And together we can rule ---

	MID: VADER is speaking to LUKE, clenching his fist. VADER extends his hand when he says "son!"

		VADER
		--- the galaxy as father and son!

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at VADER. BEN KENOBI starts to talk to LUKE. LUKE looks 			    around and stops when he is facing his left. He talks.

		BEN KENOBI
		Luke! Luke!

		LUKE
		Ben?

	WIDE: BEN is hovering in mid-air speaking to LUKE.

		BEN
		Don't listen to him, Luke, he just chopped your hand off!

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at BEN. LUKE speaks to BEN. VADER addresses LUKE and LUKE 			    turns to face VADER.

		LUKE
		That's true.

		VADER
		Listen son ---

	MID: VADER is speaking to LUKE.

		VADER
		--- if you don't get over here right now, God help me, we're not going to Disney Land.

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at VADER. LUKE speaks to VADER. BEN addresses LUKE. LUKE turns 		    to face BEN.

		LUKE
		Aww, but Da-aad!

		BEN
		Luke ---

	WIDE: BEN is hovering in mid-air speaking to LUKE.

		BEN
		--- you've always wanted to go to LEGO Land more, right?

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at BEN. LUKE speaks to BEN.

		LUKE
		Not really. It would be like visiting a museum.

	WIDE: BEN is hovering in mid-air speaking to LUKE.

		BEN
		Hmm... Good point. What about cookies? You like those right? That's it. ---

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at BEN. BEN finishes his line. LUKE talks to BEN. VADER talks 		    to BEN.

		BEN
		--- If you leave now you will get cookies!

		LUKE
		I do like cookies!

		VADER
		Now, wait a minute ---

	MID: VADER is speaking to BEN.

		VADER
		--- we have cookies too!

	WIDE: BEN is hovering in mid-air speaking to LUKE.

		BEN
		But we have milk!

	MID: VADER is speaking to BEN.

		VADER
		Damn! (pause) Touche.

	WIDE: BEN is hovering in mid-air speaking to LUKE. BEN stretches out his hand as he says "young Skywalker."

		BEN
		So how about it? Young Skywalker?

	CLOSE-UP: LUKE is clinging to the support beam looking at BEN. LUKE talks to BEN. LUKE jumps off of the support beam.

		LUKE
		Okay, Ben!

	MID: VADER yells.

		VADER
		NOO!!! ---

	ESTABLISHING SHOT: The shaft is empty. LUKE is falling down into the black hole.

		VADER
		--- NOO!!! (cont'd)

FADE TO BLACK

ENDING CREDITS