“i have crossed the face of the universe; i poison it to match my grief” is one of the rawest lines in Nona the Ninth. there’s like a whole thesis in here but Varun just says it so plainly, and it’s so human. because that’s what Cytherea did! that’s what John is doing! that’s what Kiriona, in all her rage and grief and loss of everything she ever had, has fallen down the path of. that’s Alecto, the fury of unceasing anger. that’s the cycle of abuse!!!