I still can’t believe that it’s 100% canon that Harrow has a nickname for Gideon that only she uses… I can’t believe it’s canon that Harrow thinks Gideon’s sweaty forearm muscle is hot… I can’t believe Harrow calling Gideon incredibly romantic names is canon… she dreams of them meeting in less complicated ways and more romantic ones… she literally can’t live with Gideon…,
In most fandoms all of the above would be headcanons but no. Harrowhark Nonagesimus is just that down bad.
“Then she dropped to a crouch again, but instead of dipping low and scratching Noodle, she gently pressed her thumb to the underside of Nona’s chin; she was smiling now, but she was smiling as though Nona had said something a little sad, and her eyes didn’t sparkle anymore.” Nona the Ninth, chapter 14
one of the genius things about the way gideon the ninth (and the locked tomb as a whole) is structured is the way that it continues to emphasize gideon as the pov character. we see the world through her eyes. we interact with characters only as much as she interacts with them. and when she blatantly misses things going on. she has no interest in the politics that are occurring and no basis for any of the existing relationships between the scions of the other houses. her priorities are (1) piss off harrow, (2) let the hot old sick girl flirt with her, and (3) sword. and that is mostly it!!
so especially during the third act, gideon - and by extension, the reader - is hit with WAVE AFTER WAVE of epic climaxes and denouements to plots that she literally was not aware were occurring. she stumbles into the aftermath of a bloody and lethal confrontation between teacher and the second house. she trips into babs’s murder and ianthe’s ascension into lyctorhood. she nearly ruins the crucial pull-back-the-curtain reveal between palamedes and cytherea because she literally tries to run into the middle of it to apologize because she didn’t know that she had been flirting with his almost-fiancée.
when you read the book for the first time, all of these things feel as overwhelming to you as they do to gideon. the uptight military commander is injured and the slightly less uptight military lieutenant is dead?? that prick with the quiff got cannibalized by his evil stick figure bully??? harry potter BLEW UP???
and then you go back to everything on reread, knowing the context for where things will eventually go, and go ohhhhh. all of the information was there the first time. you just never had any reason to care about it. it’s such a brilliant way to hide information in plain sight and play with an unwittingly unreliable narrator
Gideon! You really liked my Harrow design so here you have her cavalier with impractical belts and trying her best to play the part.
Also, if you’re asking yourself about the random color variation… I just like to imagine some of the artificial light in Drearburh is black light and their paint glows. I think it’s neat, you can see Harrow’s here!
Palamedes [cole sprouse] would be the protagonist. Gideon would die on the first night at Canaan, right after coming out. Moving on, Pal’d be in an official love triangle with Harrow [jenna ortega] and Coronabeth [melissa benoist] after being rebuffed by Cytherea [cate blanchett] but the dominating fan fave ship would be babsamedes.
Twitter would momentarily shut after s2 episode where he and Ianthe are having dubiously pornographic onscreen sex and she’s making him hold eye contact - he finishes right after her eyes switch to blue and brown.
The show creators, when asked about the scene, feign ignorance of the word homosexuality and ask for it to be looked up in a dictionary and read to them.
gideon the ninth: “ah, I understand,” said palamades, “what’s happening here is-” at this point, Gideon decided to think about how hot dulcinia was
harrow the ninth: “i hate you you stupid little bug” said mercymorn, to which thirty percent of your body started bleeding profusely. Ianthe, The Body, and your sword judged you very harshly for this. “now now everyone,” said God, “play nice together” as Gideon’s spear protruded between your ribs.
nona the ninth: “I sure do love life,” said nona. “God, you’re such a loser,” replied her friends Chewing Cinderblocks and Hot Cheeto Dust. Cow Wall Flashback. Noodle barked. Cow Wall Flashback “man, we should really do something about the magic beam that makes people insane,” said palamades to the local commander, He Who Crowns Headless Chickens. Cow Wall Flashback.
Something possesed me and this came out, I don’t have much explanation for this one, just yearning griddlehark. There is some symbolism going on but it’s up to interpretation!
It’s the cowgirl necro and her gunslinger cav! Who is so damn extra she’s got three guns: one left, one right, and one in pole position! (She swears the ladies love it!)
I got inspired by this post by @thatneoncrisis and I also wanted to draw butch Nona because butches can be silly goofy colorful too and let nobody ever tell you otherwise
Hey chat: how many of you headcanon griddlehark as butch4butch. Like different flavors of butch, but still. At the very least in an au where harrow doesn’t wear her habit and nun wear, I think she’d be a soft butch emo/goth. And I think about boydyke gideon all the time. Jock/emo supremacy
More tlt art about harrow getting carried around by gideon in stupid ways. I went back for the rest of the pics, I drew this stuff for like an hour instead of working yesterday.
Once and a while I see a piece of tlt fanart where harrow is really wrapped around gideon and I love that a lot. I drew myself a little bit of it as a treat today:
and then got carried away
I was way too ambitious with these poses for drawing with pen and some shitty whiteout tape
once again thinking about the fact that harrowhark nonagesimus is a five-foot-nothing necrophiliac dweeb ass nun. she is soggy and bleeding and does not sleep enough. for most of htn she has about ¾ of a functioning brain. she looks at everyone like she’s worked out how to kill them. her entire life is consumed by an all-encompassing grief and guilt that isn’t even hers. she’s got a mean sense of humor and pockets full of dubiously sourced teeth. and every eligible bachelorette in the nine houses would fling themselves into the sun for her hand in marriage.
something something camilla hect is orpheus in the sense of. you’re gone but you will keep following me. i know you’re gone but i will never stop walking and carrying you with me. i will carry your bones around my neck. i will carry your soul inside my head. as long as i never turn around and look at you, i will never lose you. please, can i stop walking alone now? will you please walk beside me?