Tangled Destiny, or how can I hurt myself drawing macabre women.
I finished Harrow The Ninth a bit ago and let me tell you I’m mourning, I’m mourning like something was ripped off of my very same heart. Despite it’s not the first time I feel like this after reading a pretty intense book, this time I feel like actual pain, a knot in my throat, weight on my chest. It’s going to be a while until the next book that I’ll need to suffer with art and fanfics.
I draw silly things because I’m mourning for a book, a book that has destroyed my poor little heart.
It’s not the first time a book hurts my soul, but I’m pretty sure I haven’t been this in pain like I am now. And I’m kind of afraid, because I’m a hopeless romantic, I like some angst but in the end I believe love (any kind of true love) is the goal, the answer, the path to follow.
But what if the books end… bad…? Would I be able to find cold comfort on fanfics? On art? Will I have an eternal little thorn hammered in my heart?
I don’t know, I’m not sure.
Do you know when you’re in love, so so much in love that your whole chest seems to be crushing itself? In love for people who don’t exist but that are real in your mind anyways, people you find yourself thinking about, people who could make you smile but also weep.
And between books, a very long wait until next year, I am mourning.
I needed to draw her since I did a random sketch of her.
I want to color it with watercolor so I do a colour testing in procreate and maybe I will draw more Cavaliers like an illustration collection. It depends of my free time xD
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