“Ninth was my name,” said the new arrival. “Ninth was my hearth, and my homeland. Here have I come at your calling. None may return from the River unless he be bidden by blood-rite; tell me, why have I been drawn here?”
naberius was doomed by the narrative this, babs is actually a tragic character that. what are you talking about, this man had a perfect life. i wish my biggest problem was getting eaten by two tall hot blondes. privileged, thats what he was.
A scientific consideration of cultural preservation in Gideon the Ninth
HYPOTHESIS: the Venus de Milo is in Canaan House
REASONING: John is keen on decoration (the rest of Canaan House, the Mithraeum, his fancy baby-bone crown). John has strong opinions on preserving things he considers ‘worthy’ (the earth, his friends, Shakespeare). Why not famous art? Canaan House is filled with old and rotting portraits - they can’t ALL be of Cyrus and Valancy.
EVIDENCE:
There was a single statue at the end of the corridor where it turned left. It must have once been a person, but the head and arms had been lopped off, leaving only a torso with beseeching stumps. - GtN p130-1 (when Gideon is looking for Harrow)
beseeching stumps?? It’s simply got to be the Venus de Milo. No stumps plead more tenderly:
But she has a head! I hear you protest.
Aha! Now we come to Palamedes and Camilla doing psychometry to figure out the age of Canaan House:
“Fiat lux! If you want to talk improbable, let’s talk about this”-a scrape of stone on stone-“being three thousand and some years older than this.” A heavy clunk.
About 3000 years older than another part of Canaan House? Hmm! And what’s that Camilla is holding?
“Standing next to him holding a big wedge of broken sculpture and the flashlight was a tall, equally grey-wrapped figure with a scabbard outlined at her hip.”
“The cavalier narrowed her hooded eyes, fidgets gone and absolutely still; then she exploded into action. She dropped the wedge of sculpture with a clonk, drew her sword from its shabby scabbard before the wedge had bounced once, and advanced.”
SCULPTURE!
CONCLUSION: the Venus de Milo IS in Canaan House! However, it was decapitated by known practical thinker and simp Camilla Hect so that Palamedes Sextus could do his carbon dating easier without tiring out his necromancer noodle arms
SECONDARY CONCLUSION: Camilla was going to use the head of the Venus de Milo to bash open the laboratory hatch
Palamedes Sextus with a singed souvenir tshirt that reads “I went to the First House and all I got was this lousy t-shirt ATOMISED IN A RADICAL THANERGETIC FISSION EVENT”
had a dream last night that John Gaius from the locked tomb gave me top surgery. He said “will you stop fucking complaining already” and he snapped his fingers and they were gone. He was being a bit of a nasty cunt about it but all things considered it was a nice thing to do
