Gonna make some fuckin bookmarks 🌚🌞
Gonna make some fuckin bookmarks 🌚🌞
Ecce homo, dearest!
Ianthe Tridentarius, from The Locked Tomb: she’s mean. She’s pathetic. She doesn’t care about anything but actually that’s a lie, she cares so much. She definitely cries about Harrow. Wet rat. Casually snacked on a real living guy on the regular. Tall and blonde. If the wind blew too hard she would fly away.
The Witch of the Waste, from Howl’s Moving Castle: large woman. Mean. Before she became all grandma looking…. Like look. I get why Howl pursued her. I also get why he got scared off. She would scoff at me.
And so:
Helga Sinclair, from Atlantis: her. She. She’s strong and blonde. Yet another woman who would scoff at me. She would kick me off a bridge. I think she was the first character whose boobs I oogled.
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite pulling all the bitches without even trying. Tragic. Just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god I think. Deeply swagless. She would smell so bad. She is 5 feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.
Love these bitches.
Mercymorn, from The Locked Tomb: she’s so tired of everything. She is in the mom branch of the bracket because while she is very much not a mom, she IS an old woman. She is 10 000 years old. She was part of a jizz heist, which resulted in the birth of butch lesbian Jesus. Icon. She is hate married to her coworkers.
Ponyo’s Mom, from Ponyo: giant woman. Love her. Love that she has a tiny husband. She’s so pretty
Pink hair vs pink hair,
Drew Wake and Mercy for the bracket thing I’m doing. I love middle aged women
Camilla Hect, from The Locked Tomb: Camilla is so great. One of the most women ever. She has swords and knives. She raised a child with THE Pyrrha Dve. She’s so good and so unhealthily attached to her second cousin. They shared a body. I have beef with her cousin because it’s HIS FAULT SHES— SHE DESERVED BETTER. I KNOW SHE DIDNT MIND. I DO NOT CARE. FEEL LIKE PURE SHITE JUST WANT MY CAM BACK
Begonia Amour, from Countdown to countdown: loved her in the first version of the story, love her in the current one too! She’s so pretty and such an interesting character, im obsessed with her hair. I’m much more normal about her than I am about cam, but I think that’s because she hasn’t been wronged that much yet.
And with this, we kick off:
Gideon Nav, from The Locked Tomb: she’s my girl. Period. Would throw me over her shoulder and I would be happy to let her.
Sophie Hatter, from Howl’s Moving Castle: boss ass bitch. Her balls…. They’re huge. She’s so girl. More chaotic in the book than in the movie. Badass in both. Managed to pull Howl “babygirl of the century” Movingcastle. So slay. Go off queen.
Let’s go,
Kuvira, from The Legend of Korra: thick brows. Strong ideals. The mole. I changed the part in my hair because of her, and then the way I parted my hair became a deciding factor in regards to which ear I got pierced. She has literally Physically altered me. She gets unhinged towards the end. Love it.
Ianthe Tridentarius, from The Locked Tomb: she’s mean. She’s pathetic. She doesn’t care about anything but actually that’s a lie, she cares so much. She definitely cries about Harrow. Wet rat. Casually snacked on a real living guy on the regular. Tall and blonde. If the wind blew too hard she would fly away.
Let’s begin,
Hot Guest Lecturer I Had For One Class, from Real Life: just the prettiest woman ever. She was definitely twice my age but I think it’s fine to admire people who are older than you. If I would’ve carried her children if she had asked me to. She designed a sculpture for the middle part of a roundabout (we have things in the middle of our roundabouts here). So cool. Looked like she was this🤏 close to leaving the lecture hall; that’s how done with us she looked. I don’t even remember her name but wow.
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite pulling all the bitches without even trying. Tragic. Just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god I think. Deeply swagless. She would smell so bad. She is 5 feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.
Granmamare, Ponyo’s Mom, from Ponyo: giant woman. Love her. Love that she has a tiny husband. She’s so pretty
Awake Remembrance of These Valiant Dead Kia Hua Ko Te Pai Snap Back To Reality Oops There Goes Gravity, Gideon’s “Mom”, from The Locked Tomb: worst mom ever. She isn’t even a mom, she just gave birth so she could kill the baby (but she didn’t!). Was in a hate/love throuple with two people inhabiting the same body. The guy who owned the body didn’t know the third person was in his body. She tried to kill god. She was part of the jizz heist.
Camilla Hect, from The Locked Tomb: Camilla is so great. One of the most women ever. She has swords and knives. She raised a child with THE Pyrrha Dve. She’s so good and so unhealthily attached to her second cousin. They shared a body. I have beef with her cousin because it’s HIS FAULT SHES— SHE DESERVED BETTER. I KNOW SHE DIDNT MIND. I DO NOT CARE. FEEL LIKE PURE SHITE JUST WANT MY CAM BACK
America Chavez, the Marvel character: she is the only marvel character I own comic books of. She’s the best, she’s gay, her moms were gay. Great hair. Could throw me but wouldn’t unless I did something evil.
Gideon Nav, from The Locked Tomb: she’s my girl. Period. Would throw me over her shoulder and I would be happy to let her.
Christine Daae, from Phantom of the Opera: god she’s so pretty. When I would watch the movie as a kid I would just be watching her. I did not know the plot of the story until a few years ago. None of it entered my brain but Her. Look at that hair. Damn
Anyways I can’t wait for Gideon and Harrow to get married On Sight in Alecto
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite being the most bitched person in the entire series. Tragic, just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god. Deeply swagless, would smell so bad. She is five feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.
Ianthe Tridentarius, from The Locked Tomb: she’s mean. She’s pathetic. She doesn’t care about anything but actually that’s a lie, she cares so much. She definitely cries about Harrow. Wet rat. Casually snacked on a real living guy on the regular. Tall and blonde. If the wind blew too hard she would fly away.
It’s time,
Fiona Pitch, from The Simon Snow Series: she’s a criminal. She’s a vampire hunter who dates vampires. She’s a mediocre aunt but she’s doing her best. I love her your honor.
Awake Remembrance of These Valiant Dead Kia Hua Ko Te Pai Snap Back To Reality Oops There Gies Gravity, from The Locked Tomb: worst mom ever. She isn’t even a mom, she just gave birth so she could kill the baby (but she didn’t!). Was in a fucked up love/hate polycule with two people sharing a body. She tried to kill god. She was part of a jizz heist.
Camilla Hect, from The Locked Tomb: Camilla is so great. One of the most women ever. She has swords and knives. She raised a child with THE Pyrrha Dve. She’s so good and so unhealthily attached to her second cousin. They shared a body. I have beef with her cousin because it’s HIS FAULT SHES— SHE DESERVED BETTER. I KNOW SHE DIDNT MIND. I DO NOT CARE. FEEL LIKE PURE SHITE JUST WANT MY CAM BACK
Gideon Nav, from The Locked Tomb: she’s my girl. Period. Would throw me over her shoulder and I would happily let her. She wants so desperately to belong. She has the worst fucking parents.
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite being the most bitched person in the entire series. Tragic, just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god. Deeply swagless, would smell so bad. She is five feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.
Awake Remembrance of These Valiant Dead Kia Hua Ko Te Pai Snap Back To Reality Oops There Gies Gravity, from The Locked Tomb: worst mom ever. She isn’t even a mom, she just gave birth so she could kill the baby (but she didn’t!). Was in a fucked up love/hate polycule with two people sharing a body. She tried to kill god. She was part of a jizz heist.
In-law fight,
Gideon Nav, from The Locked Tomb: she’s my girl. Period. Would throw me over her shoulder and I would happily let her. She wants so desperately to belong. She has the worst fucking parents.
Morticia Addams, from the Addams Family: icon. Is in one of the healthiest marriages ever. Loved her as a kid. What else is there to say.
Butch babe fights milf,
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite being the most bitched person in the entire series. Tragic, just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god. Deeply swagless, would smell so bad. She is five feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.
Gideon Nav, from The Locked Tomb: she’s my girl. Period. Would throw me over her shoulder and I would happily let her. She wants so desperately to belong. She has the worst fucking parents. Jesus figure. Is bitchless (as far as she knows)
After many moons apart, bitched and bitchless face each other in the last round of my gay poll.
Godspeed, girls. Godspeed.
“Then, perish.”
Honesty moment: when I read htn I imagined G1deon as the most dried up, scrangly looking dude ever, a dull twig of a man. Since learning that Pyrrha Dve shares that same body? Handsome, lively, thriving, well built. Nicely shaped eyebrows. The biggest pecs, a rack, even. I used to imagine G1deon as flour. Now that I know Pyrrha’s in there, they’re the spiciest and hottest person in the whole series. She is carrying his whole physique. It’s all thanks to her. I’m sorry G1deon but you are only interesting because you ate a bad bitch and she stayed slaying
“It had bewildered her, back at Canaan House, how the whole of her always seemed to come back to Gideon. For one brief and beautiful space in time, she had welcomed it: that microcosm of eternity between forgiveness and the slow, uncomprehending agony of the fall. Gideon rolling up her shirt sleeves. Gideon dappled in shadow, breaking promises. One idiot with a sword and an asymmetrical smile had proved to be Harrow’s end: her apocalypse swifter than the death of the Emperor and the sun with him.”