Harrowhark Nonagesimus, from The Locked Tomb: pathetic. Lives life as if she is thoroughly bitchless, despite being the most bitched person in the entire series. Tragic, just wants her griddle back and also vengeance against god. Deeply swagless, would smell so bad. She is five feet of pure disaster and she is so good at it.

Ianthe Tridentarius, from The Locked Tomb: she’s mean. She’s pathetic. She doesn’t care about anything but actually that’s a lie, she cares so much. She definitely cries about Harrow. Wet rat. Casually snacked on a real living guy on the regular. Tall and blonde. If the wind blew too hard she would fly away.

It’s time,