ok but the parallels between htn and gideon’s upbringing though.
- be her
- young and sad and vulnerable
- have a vague sense of something missing but no real memories of the person who would fill that void
- trapped and surrounded by people who neither like nor respect you through absolutely no fault of your own
- you are broken in a way that you can’t describe or justify but which you instinctively understand
- this is a large part of why the people around you neither like nor respect you
- also you are robbed of physical autonomy at every turn
- it is made very clear to you that you don’t get to pick how you dress and you don’t get to pick where you go and you don’t get to pick what tasks are assigned to you and nothing you are given truly belongs to you
- also there is one person in particular who is antagonizing you to a greater degree than anyone else
- they cause you significant bodily harm on a regular basis and you don’t know what else they may be capable of
- this person has unrestricted access to you and may attack at literally any time
- this includes moments you wish to be private
- your privacy is a whim of people surrounding you and cannot be effectively defended
- there is one person who seems to like and care about you in a parent-coded kind of way
- however
- this person either cannot or will not protect you in any way that matters and they don’t love you the way you need them to
- you don’t blame them
- you resent the way these people treat you
- but not so much that you actually think they’re wrong
and i. god i feel like htn is pretty much just the most brutally efficient way to level the playing field. if harrow didn’t Get gideon before then boy howdy i bet she does now. i want to tear something apart with my teeth.