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tiffanyachings:

Your voice did not feel like it belonged to you when you said, “I saw your corpse.” “Well,” said Camilla Hect steadily, “don’t tell everyone, or they’ll want to see it too.”ALT
"Cam, I’ll use your blood—it’s the one resource we’ve got basically sprayed around the room.” “I can give you some more,” said Camilla. “There’s a spoonful left, somewhere in here.”ALT
Camilla said, “Can I keep it?” “What—my handkerchief?” “It’s a nice handkerchief,” said Camilla. “You’re not taking this seriously, are you,” said the Prince.ALT
“Hect, let’s get one thing straight: I’m giving the orders and if you don’t say 'Yes, sir, no, sir, three bags full, sir,' I shoot out your kneecaps and use you as a meat shield,” said Pash. “Three bags full of what?” said Camilla. “Fucking whoop-ass if you don’t do what I say, comedian.”ALT
“Ask me how I am and I’ll scream,” she said. “How are you,” said Camilla, who was a pill.ALT
"Either this entire building was scavenged from a garbage hopper, or I am being systematically lied to on a molecular level.” “Maybe the building’s shy.”ALT

she’s the funniest person alive actually