“came back wrong” this “lived wrong” that, what about dying wrong. my death will forever cling to you, leaving behind a slimy trail and a metallic taste in your mouth. my soul will forever drag you down like the heavy corpse of a long-dead god, who somehow still grants wishes. you can’t tell which one of us is the one not letting go. you know not even your own death will end this.
dont do this to me
people are already reblogging this with their blorbos im doomed
[ID: a stock image of two arms shaking hands. the left arm is labelled ‘jason mendoza’ and the right is labelled 'gideon nav’. the point where they are shaking hands is labelled 'faking a vow of silence to hide how much they are not a monk’.]
anyway now that Nona’s been out for 48 hours I feel comfortable sharing my personal favorite joke of the entire thing, which was Camilla valiantly trying to deflect Nona’s curiosity and defend Palamedes’ honor by insisting that he’s a respectable nerd whose sexual interests center academic achievement only for Palamedes to out himself as having a nurse kink with 0 hesitation the second he got control of the body
Harrowhark “first flower of my house” Nonagesimus is the same person who beat Gideon into unconsciousness to stop her from getting onto that shuttle and Gideon “if aught but death part me and thee” Nav is the same person who carried Harrow back to her room after she almost died in a bone and still let her hit her head on the walls as they walked. there’s layers ok
before i read nona the ninth, i saw spoilers that convinced me nona was the soul of the cows john killed. reading the book only further confirmed this
[image description: digital illustrations of nona from the locked tomb series. in one, she looks suspiciously at some eggs on her fork. it’s labelled, “doesn’t like eating human food (more used to eating grass).” the next shows her struggling to put socks on and is labelled, “uncoordinated (used to have hooves).” the last shows her sitting next to a calf. both are smiling with their tongues sticking out and she’s giving the calf bunny ears. they’re both labelled, “watches sunsets, has best friends, exhibits mourning behaviour.”]
im just like gideon nav if she was a useless white boydyke who grew up eating well and basking in the sunlight instead of malnourished inside a canyon on pluto. so i guess that makes me just like naberius tern
please go on. what is the nine houses to italian regions equivalency
the second house is giving me piemonte crossed with like. carabinieri centro-meridionali delle fiction rai. im so sorry pyrrha dve
the third house is unquestionably an unholy mix of roma parioli, napoli vomero, romagna and milan. walk walk fashion baby
the fourth and fifth are molise e puglia to me if only because of how they orbit each other. i know abigail can make some mean orecchiette con le cime di rapa
the sixth house is sicily. extremely hot weather, a volcano, suspiciously close cousin relationships, and a former cultural melting pot
the seventh house is toscana but specifically how fiorentini talk about florence that it makes you think it’s the garden of eden built anew while it’s actually a toxic dump. rhodes is isola d'elba
the eighth house is like. vatican city. white garments + a god cult used in the name of justifying atrocities + weird pope stuff. also mercy is roman
the ninth house is kinda hard to pin down but id have to say some forlorn shit like valle d'aosta or trentino alto adige which pains me deeply to admit.
the first house is sardinia and specifically jod’s summer house in the costa smeralda. likewise the mithraeum is his yacht
I’d say that the ninth house is definitely Aosta Valley: we have a deep fixation with cows (bataille des reines ftw), and what is the Ninth if not John’s biggest PR failure and the first step in his downfall?
(edit: to clarify, nona gets the sex joke! she just doesn’t understand the context. girlie knows very little about necromancers and cavaliers and she definitely doesn’t know ‘one flesh one end’)
Tamsyn Muir really just sat down and wrote a book from the pov of the character least qualified to have any fucking clue about what’s going on and then proceeded to make sure each successive book was written from the perspective of an even less qualified bitch. Like we go from a jock filling in last minute at an international science competition, to a traumatized teenager with a DIY lobotomy trying to keep up with a bunch of 10,000 year old demigods, to a SIX MONTH OLD operating in a TERRORIST CELL. Pray for Alecto y’all, homegirl doesn’t stand a chance in hell of understanding the story she’s in.
imagine being varun tho. your little sister calls you in the middle of the night, crying hysterically and asking for you to come pick her up, and when you scramble to go get her, more terrified than you’ve ever been in your entire planet ghost life, she just rolls her eyes and tells you that you overreacted and you’re being so embarrassing oh my god varun all my friends are here and they’re going to think you’re like weird!!!!… I think I would be a little miffed too honestly