2023-11-08 4:24:42 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

sumamitt:

> mayasaura:

> > cat-boy-tits:

> > > mayasaura:

> > > > impossiblepackage:

> > > > > mayasaura:

> > > > > > mayasaura:

> > > > > > > Ortus’ murder from the point of view of Harrow the Ninth is like. So turns out Crux isn’t just Harrow’s seneschal, he’s her nurse. He was her touchstone for reality for years, the person she turned to to ask “did that really happen?” or “is that real?”. And he lied to her.

> > > > > > > She didn’t believe him, about Ortus. He didn’t succeed at pulling that one over on her, but he tried. Which kind of makes you question how many times he might have tried it before, and how many times he wasn’t caught.

> > > > > > #like Harrow doesn’t tell anyone about watching Silas kill Coronabeth because she wasn’t sure she was an accurate reporter #if she saw Crux straight up try to murder Gideon who would she believe #Crux or her own eyes? #especially if Gideon was walking around miraculously recovered the next time she saw her #and once she does start to doubt Crux #what is she going to do about it? #accuse and punish her caregiver? #alienate the one person who knows about her psychosis? #the one person she trusted to help her through the worst of it? #it’s fucked up man #it’s all the way fucked up (op tags)

> > > > > Once again thinking about Ortus’s guilt that he, a grown man, didn’t do more to help Harrow even though he KNEW she needed it.

> > > > Oh man. I hadn’t considered Ortus’ perspective on this. Because Harrow didn’t come out to him as psychotic until after his death. He knew things weren’t great for her, before. He knew he had a responsibility to her that he was too preoccupied by his own troubles to fulfill. But he’d had no idea how bad it was.

> > > > Now the whole time he’s in Canaan House, getting to know her better, serving as her interpretor when asked, he has to be thinking “Who did this for her before?”. And he has to know. And he has to realise just how profoundly he failed Harrow, as an adult in her life.

> > > i don’t remember exactly but i don’t think Crux lied to Harrow. not exactly. he just…didn’t tell her. i think that’s how she knew.

> > > i do wonder though how many of the attempts on her life that Gideon blamed on Harrow were actually Crux.

> > > i wish Ortus had had the strength to be there for them both.

> > ALT

> > He lied.

> Ouch also makes me think about in Gideon the Ninth when Harrow doesn’t tell Gideon about finding Protesilaus’s head I thought it was because she didn’t trust her/bad communication but it was probably also because she was worried the whole thing was an hallucination and that’s why she kept the head in her closet: as proof