2014-02-05 1:05:15 ¶ ●

I won’t subject you to that unpleasant flashing GIF again. In your mind’s eye, you watch as I drag another random album out of the crazy blinking pixel ether. Turns out it’s AlterniaBound. Strap in, because there’s a ton of good music on this album.

2014-02-05 4:02:06 ¶ ●

By Joren “Tensei” de Bruin

Image source: Homestuck.

Right off the bat, the album starts with a fantastic track.

Up until the middle of Act 5 Act 2, Aradia has a pretty hard time of it in the comic. She whiplashes from apathetic (as a ghost), to violent and hotblooded (as a homicidal robot), to serene (as a god-tier). This track characterizes that last development in character.

It’s just so perky and positive. Aradia’s spent so long being burned out and jaded that she doesn’t really know how to be cheerful and optimistic. So she accidentally goes way too far without realizing it.

In an album just jam-packed with memorable hooks and cool riffs, this one stands out as my favorite track.

2014-02-06 4:02:18 ¶ ●

By Malcolm Brown

Hoo boy, where to start. Of all the non-flash tracks, this one has the most specific setting and purpose, relative to the webcomic itself.

The song’s structured as a medley: each of the trolls have a basic theme, mostly from the Alternia album, and in one form or another, they’re each revisited in this tune. But it’s not just twelve songs stitched together: there’s a great, coherent original theme, and each of those wide-ranging leitmotifs flow well throughout the track.

My favorite bit’s the heavy, fuzzy electric guitar that kicks in around 5:30. After all of the other trolls quit clowning around, Vriska steps in to put the king down.

The song has an official script of sorts in the liner notes that describes the action. It’s inspired some pretty crazy fan projects, too — even as we speak, a multi-year project is nearing completion to create a fan-Flash that shows the battle between the trolls and the Black King. With this song as its centerpiece, of course.

2014-02-07 4:01:52 ¶ ●

By Joren “Tensei” de Bruin

Image source: Homestuck.

Most of it is pure Troll Pirates of the Carribean. But then, near the end, there’s a hilarious, accordion-backed version of Crustacean. To quote Tensei, “When writing this song, I kinda envisioned a big ship to ship battle between Vriska and Eridan, with a bumbling Karkat acting as comic relief at the very end…”

Mission accomplished.

2014-02-08 4:02:03 ¶ ●

By Mark Hadley. Honking and vocals added by Toby “Radiation” Fox.

Fanart source: tinikah. What’s that? You haven’t checked out her awesome art blog yet? You totally should!

Crank this bitch. The best part of this song isn’t the dangerous, booming synth. Nor is it the backing strings section that slathers on the tension thick. Or the flighty piano that suggests frightened prey backing itself into a corner. All of these things make the track better, but none of them are the best part of the song.

The horn honks? No. Not even the horn honks. The best part of this song is the malicious, warped vocal sample that haunts us throughout, like a pair of badly-educated, bombastic juggaloes in bad makeup.

MIRACLES.

2014-02-09 4:02:00 ¶ ●

By Thomas “EidolonOrpheus” Ferkol

Deep, distorted heavy metal. Part of me even thinks that this could have been a bad-ass theme for Vriska in the game: might be a little intense for a Flash game’s ambient music, but it’s such a cool jam.

2014-02-10 4:02:23 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

Image source: Shelby Cragg.

Starting with that twangy, laid-back guitar intro, this song is sorta hard to pin down. The energy level drives upwards to a crazy synth beat, before drifting back down to a calmer interlude, over and over. It fits the webcomic Flash pretty well, what with its give and take between characters who aren’t afraid to bring random fork stabbings into the fray.

2014-02-11 4:01:52 ¶ ●

By Erik “Jit” Scheele

Under the Hat is a great stand-alone piano tune, but this takes it to the next level. The grainy, warbly organ, the distant, stale muted trumpet, the twangy bass, the static… it’s the perfect introduction for a hard-boiled 40’s detective radio serial.

2014-02-12 4:02:18 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

Image source: Homestuck.

In the liner notes, Radiation sums it up best: “I didn’t call it “Kanaya’s Theme” because I didn’t think that it was stylish enough for her.”

2014-02-13 4:01:54 ¶ ●

By Malcolm Brown

A cool mashup with the tone of Terezi’s Theme and flow and energy of Sburban Jungle.

2014-02-14 4:02:12 ¶ ●

By Joren “Tensei” de Bruin

The combination of spaghetti-western harmonica and surf-music guitar just screams Quentin Tarantino. Of course, so does the Mexican standoff paired with this tune. The only troll that makes it through unscathed is the dead one. Go figure.

2014-02-15 4:02:16 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

Source for images: Homestuck.

At first it’s like…

… but then it turns all…

It’s almost like the song were…. split into halves.

2014-02-16 4:02:13 ¶ ●

By Mark Hadley

Even more legitimately chilling than Blackest Heart. Fuck that clown.

2014-02-17 4:02:18 ¶ ●

By Seth “Beatfox” Peelle. “Theme” by Toby “Radiation” Fox.

I always thought of this as sort of a companion piece to Homestuck. With all of the energy, the anger, and retribution on Alternia, this song feels almost artificially sentimental.

Of course, that label only applies when trying to shoehorn this into the album’s context. And its mellow, positive vibe does well to slow down the album’s breakneck pace a little. As a stand-alone piece, musically it’s right up there with Sarabande or Indigo Heir.

2014-02-18 4:02:09 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

That filthy tuba’s been polished to a high sheen for this remix. Crustacean, from Alternia, fits in seamlessly as a walkaround theme. Just as curmudgeonly, but a little more evenly paced.

2014-02-19 4:02:45 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

The steel drum is a big upgrade from the MarioPaint samples used on this tune’s predecessor. It’s less a gimmick and more a cool Caribbean beat.

2014-02-20 4:02:43 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

Fanart source: tinikah.

Crazy synth thrash energy. In the middle it borders on chaos, like a 16-bit freight train barreling out of control.

2014-02-21 4:02:07 ¶ ●

By Alexander Rosetti

This just might be my favorite Cage pick.

It’s a goofy Western piece at its core, but with a sort of ironic authority behind it. From the booming timpanis, to the drawn-out melody, all the way through to the stately “isn’t it sad when a clown cries” coda.

I’d like to be able to say that I haven’t listened to this tune dozens and dozens of times. Yeah. I’d sure like to be able to say that.

On the flip side, I’m happy to say that it puts a smile on my face every time I hear it.

2014-02-22 4:02:12 ¶ ●

Fanart source: tinikah.

Trollcops (Radio Play) (by Erik “Jit” Scheele, with words by Nick “OMGTSN” Smalley) is a bonus track that takes that base Trollcops melody to its logical conclusion. Well, not quite: this version seems to have come first (according to the liner notes), with the instrumental version following. Regardless, the voiceover’s great, with that stern, staccato ‘30’s cadence.

For a little bit of atmospheric context, check out the introduction to Dragnet from the early '50’s.

2014-02-23 4:01:57 ¶ ●

By Toby “Radiation” Fox

It’s easy on the ears, but the pace just makes it feel handcuffed. I think it’s a little too mellow and relaxed for, and I quote, “THE MOST VILE BACKSTABBING SOCIOPATH WHO EVER LIVED.”

2014-02-23 22:50:47 ¶ ●

RATING: 12 / 13 – Dynamite lit in a box of hot shit. Screw the haters.

Oh man, this is some serious ear-candy.

AlterniaBound is the companion album to the Homestuck Flash games that were released during Act 5 Act 2. About half of the tracks were used as background themes for various characters. But it stands well on its own.

The only criticism I can offer: it’s a little one-dimensional at times. But that’s kind of the point: this album’s core is the soundtrack for the Flash games in the comic. There’s no dead spots: it’s full of energy and catchy as hell.

Click here for individual song reviews for AlterniaBound.