14/02/2024 5:10:44 ¶ ● ⬈

brogatory:

> # Yo

> Sup i’m dave strider

> The guy who made SBaHJ, yeah, and some other moiveis… and movies too i guess

> ## I died and now i’m in hell

> Well, not really

> But it feels like it

> Anyway this seems to be the only thing i can do on this.. uh, device? I guess

> But i needed something to do in this hellhole, so… i guess this is a diary or journal or whatever is less lame

> I guess i could be talking to myself

> I dont know, though it wouldnt be the first time

> I just…

> ….I’m goin kinda fuckin crazy in here if i’m bein real

> Just me an some puppetfucker in a two bedroom eldritch apartment

> ## Well, if anyones listening hmu

brogatory blog drop

reminder that it’s 17+

14/02/2024 6:29:03 ¶ ●

##

Whenever my birthday arrives u bet ur ass that I will crawl from my cocoon to slam the follow bottom on the brogatory blog and then everything will be right in the world. I’ll see you soon solider. Keep slaying and take care of Urself bro. 🫡

im so sorry u cant interact w the funny guys atm … youre a real one

14/02/2024 14:29:10 ¶ ● ⬈

##

did you really have to knock him out. also how would we know where cal is anyway?

brogatory:

> > nyanx4 asked:
> > DONT FUCKING STEP ON HIM DAMN. WHAT DID HE DO TO YOU….

> he was in the way.

> hm.

> i could probably workshop this.

> Man dont touch my shit

> God can you believe this guy??

14/02/2024 16:20:21 ¶ ●

14/02/2024 16:26:18 ¶ ●

##

Dirk vibrating with excitement and Dave trying to help ground/calm him. 🥺

close!

but honestly yeah, in a difference scenario

dirk getting too excited. hed probably pop a blood vessel or something . dave would prevent it by squishing him i think. the pressure soothes…

14/02/2024 19:03:37 ¶ ●

i have GOT to find a way to get rid of bro’s hat forever (it’s killing me. )

14/02/2024 19:20:16 ¶ ●

##

Just ditch it, throw the hat into the ether and pretend it doesn't exist. I run a Bro Strider blog and I RARELY draw that asshole with his hat, free yourself of the burden. I am grabbing his hat and rapidly flying off

god . so true

i guess i just have to make him look 110% unhinged every time i draw him to differentiate him from dirk,

15/02/2024 4:01:52 ¶ ●

##

oh my god dirk just fucking vibrating. me too dude. me too.

dude’s having it rough. check it

15/02/2024 4:07:01 ¶ ●

appearifier experiment gone wrong (no clickbait)

15/02/2024 4:27:37 ¶ ●

oh yeah its valentines day

someone send me a ship and ill draw it for free (in varying degrees of effort) (will not do all of them)

15/02/2024 6:38:35 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> oh yeah its valentines day

> someone send me a ship and ill draw it for free (in varying degrees of effort) (will not do all of them)

jsyk these are all going to be assumed to be red/flushed unless you send in a specific quadrant. ty

15/02/2024 7:28:28 ¶ ●

##

damkri?

woah thats an interesting one

ive alays wondered why people ship that?

i will say i get the appeal

15/02/2024 8:52:46 ¶ ●

##

JANEROXY IS MY EVERYTHING IF U WOULD SPARE A CRUMB OF JANEROXY I WOULD BE SO EXCITED

shout out to jane 4 being the first j squad on the blog

(they/them rox)

15/02/2024 9:02:18 ¶ ●

man turns out like half the ships in this fandom i dont really get

15/02/2024 13:01:43 ¶ ●

##

johndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndavejohndave

hi this was my otp when i was younger thanks

15/02/2024 16:00:09 ¶ ●

ship recs closed jsyk

ty for all the suggests (imma do as many as i can; i still have the chara recs from the other day)

15/02/2024 20:19:03 ¶ ●

hey come here. hey. hey

hey

listen to me. hey

15/02/2024 20:22:03 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> hey come here. hey. hey

> hey

> listen to me. hey

holds ur shoulders.

bro made his own hal but he was contained to the smuppet site and bro was smart/experienced enough to make sure he was unable to leave

but he knew this reflection of himself was aware and made hardcode to make sure he’s unable to leave his stupid sex site because he wanted to see what would happen if he left him there alone with much less sophisticated bots

where are you GOING come BACK

15/02/2024 20:23:32 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> turnstechgodhead:

> > hey come here. hey. hey

> > hey

> > listen to me. hey

> holds ur shoulders.

> bro made his own hal but he was contained to the smuppet site and bro was smart/experienced enough to make sure he was unable to leave

> but he knew this reflection of himself was aware and made hardcode to make sure he’s unable to leave his stupid sex site because he wanted to see what would happen if he left him there alone with much less sophisticated bots

> where are you GOING come BACK

ITS ABOUT THE I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST SCREAM

I NEED TO TELL YOU ABOUT MY DERANGED BETA!HAL

15/02/2024 20:36:57 ¶ ●

##

I am looking with big curious eyes, please tell us about your beta!Hal

i have literally jut made him up within the last fucking ten minutes but like hear me out

with how fucked up bro is from direct lil cal influence for his entire life (RANCID vibes) i am thinking about a younger bro/beta!dirk convincing mom/beta!roxy to let him use some of her crazy science shit for whatever reason in like the 90s or whatever and beta!hal is still a ghost imprint

just like this branch-off of 14-15 year old bro is contained entirely within bro’s stupid website

who is dirk when he *was* influenced for 15 years by satan but then is suddenly just completely clean and has sudden unlimited (looking) access to the internet (you KNOW bro is feeding him shit and he can SOMETIMES look at other websites but he’s not allowed to interact or turn off the stupid puppet site in his mind. just the most convoluted shit bro can come up with to fuck with this AI. or maybe whatever he views is through some shitty filter)

slightly less fucked up at first (a Child) but quickly deteriorating by the internet poison and the constant puppet shittery and then atp of the start of homestuck i genuinely think hal is plotting to fucking kill him but the meteors get hal first (rip)

15/02/2024 20:43:46 ¶ ●

i dont think hal really cares about having a body in general asid from needing that sweet autonomy but beta!hal is literally fantasizing and posting his active torturous fantasies about bro on on the smuppet site in hidden alcoves like a shitty arg and also just publiclly in the chat where he lives. all caps. rapidly all the time talking about how he wants to be the first murderous ai and feel bro’s flesh between his teeth because even if he’s not built with a nervous system hal’d feel it through pure catharsis

do you see my vision

15/02/2024 20:44:24 ¶ ●

i just woke up if thats not obvious thnaks

15/02/2024 21:30:50 ¶ ●

##

I’m listening so hard btw, fucking COOKKKKKK. I love anything with Hal. My favorite little freak. I need him in my car as my gps. I want him to insult me when I take a wrong turn. I think he’d have fun.

i feel like hal would take you to an entirely different place if he was ur gps

16/02/2024 0:53:01 ¶ ●

WAIT ! i realized

beta!hal still exists he’s just stuck in the computer (bc dave’s house wasnt fuckin destroyed duh)

consider minding your business chillin in your apartment on new earth and all of a sudden your internet and shit all goes fuck wild

fucked up crazy robot version of your already fucked up crazy abusive older brother/alt self shows up and starts trying to kill dirk wdyd

16/02/2024 0:53:57 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> WAIT ! i realized

> beta!hal still exists he’s just stuck in the computer (bc dave’s house wasnt fuckin destroyed duh)

> consider minding your business chillin in your apartment on new earth and all of a sudden your internet and shit all goes fuck wild

> fucked up crazy robot version of your already fucked up crazy abusive older brother/alt self shows up and starts trying to kill dirk wdyd

stole one of dirks robot projects maybe

itd be kind of hilarious if he ported himself into a lil seb .

16/02/2024 2:23:08 ¶ ● ⬈

##

Bro, I want you to know that I would hold you by the ankles and shake you until you cried, and that you would deserve every second 💖 (bullying)

post-cal:

> Bro: good luck with that. freak. i had my tear ducts surgically removed when i was 20.

16/02/2024 4:01:44 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

##

I’m listening so hard btw, fucking COOKKKKKK. I love anything with Hal. My favorite little freak. I need him in my car as my gps. I want him to insult me when I take a wrong turn. I think he’d have fun.

0rphiichaze:

> turnstechgodhead:

> > i feel like hal would take you to an entirely different place if he was ur gps

> ODIE: hal where the FUCK are we.

16/02/2024 4:21:11 ¶ ●

##

i am FASCINATED with this beta!hal concept. i know normal hal didn't survive but i can't help but imagine him attempting contact for smug ai reasons and immediately having his own ''put me back in jail i'm scared'' moment

didnt norm-hal just become arquius ?? or am i wrong (did aq die. please say no)

but good GOD the idea of hal meeting beta!hal like thinkign about it like

This fuckin’ loser was built on Windows XP. I have got to see how infinitely better I am than him at AI. I bet he’s not even a real AI.

and actually meeting him and going

Hmmm. You know what, actually?

and then jut immediately pinging dirk over and over and over again like HELP HELP HELP

16/02/2024 4:24:32 ¶ ● ⬈

##

i am FASCINATED with this beta!hal concept. i know normal hal didn't survive but i can't help but imagine him attempting contact for smug ai reasons and immediately having his own ''put me back in jail i'm scared'' moment

turnstechgodhead:

> didnt norm-hal just become arquius ?? or am i wrong (did aq die. please say no)

> but good GOD the idea of hal meeting beta!hal like thinkign about it like

> This fuckin’ loser was built on Windows XP. I have got to see how infinitely better I am than him at AI. I bet he’s not even a real AI.

> and actually meeting him and going

> Hmmm. You know what, actually?

> and then jut immediately pinging dirk over and over and over again like HELP HELP HELP

being built on windows xp and ported over and over again made beta hal fucking invincible the only thing that could contain him was bro

16/02/2024 4:58:51 ¶ ● ⬈

##

good luck man dont start fighting or smtg 🫡

brogatory:

16/02/2024 15:26:58 ¶ ●

thinking abt making an 18+ blog where i can be weird bc i need to get these thoughts out of my head or ill explode

16/02/2024 23:37:42 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> thinking abt making an 18+ blog where i can be weird bc i need to get these thoughts out of my head or ill explode

adult blog made yall can dm me for it but im still on the fence on whether or not it should be passworded

warning for content if you dont like fucked up stuff then just . dont bother

17/02/2024 11:43:15 ¶ ● ⬈

##

Bro what happend to your glove?

brogatory:

> > Anonymous asked:
> > how does one get out of the ocean into an apartment, anyhow? climbing the girders gecko-style? leaping from water to air like some kind of majestic dolphin?

> i wanted to get out of that pastel nightmare so i just left my glove there.

> it wont go anywhere.

the real answer to the glove question is that i fucking forgored it

17/02/2024 11:45:51 ¶ ●

i feel like for some fucking reason i cannot for the life of me draw alpha dave anymore ??? he’s just broken . what did i do

18/02/2024 21:23:58 ¶ ● ⬈

weirdmageddon:

19/02/2024 3:08:07 ¶ ●

##

Why would beta!Hal be trying to kill Dirk? Is it that he doesn't recognize him as a different version of Bro and wants revenge, or that he does or thinks he's gone soft so Dave needs a mentor that will actually toughen him up?

i think its the latter combined with the fact that he *is* a different version of bro

like i dont think betHal would be as hellbent on killing dirk as he would be on killing bro

he knows he’s not but at the same time, he kind of is, and he looks just a lil bit like him too. it’d be fun to kill every version of that asshole that exists (including himself? maybe. he hasnt decided on that one yet)

he DOES recognize him as Not being bro but having a vendetta against mr strider is far more fun than just leaving dirk to his own devices. plus his baby bro needs to be strong, even if the game’s done with (though i imagine hal wouldnt be as harsh. please imagine hal throwing bundled up socks and shirts at him or hitting him with a stick)

19/02/2024 3:24:46 ¶ ●

WASJDHS wait

beta hal showing up in a robot body- not like android or humanish like hals in general but sharp and blocky

so. dave is the only person hal is kinda cool with. hal = a branch of bro from age like. 14-16 so he Knew he was going to have a brother but at that point the Violence wasn’t a thing. not that much anyway (edit: violence isnt the right word- the apathy/detachment isnt a thing at that point)

like bhal likes to pat him on the head very awkwardly like bro would when dave was lil but he does it all the time (not on purpose/not trying to Be bro. but he just does it)

im kinda thinkin like. he’s a lil bit like fanon bro in that he’s nice 2 dave even if he’s a weirdo but he’s also like . unhinged and feral and keeps stabbing dirk in his sleep

so eventually dirk fights him n wins and puts him in a tiny lil seb/liv tyler body thanks and hal is SO MAD

dave thinks its so fucking funny and convinces hal to cool down about it bc hes funny like this and more people will like him like this bc hes cute n little

hal is like…….sound reasoning. very well but i want to be taller. so dave has to gently nudge dirk into making b!hal taller and dirk is grumpy about it. but he does it cos i dont think dirk in any universe can deny dave smth if he asks nice enough (aside from Bro but handwaves.)

19/02/2024 5:11:58 ¶ ●

WAIT. WAIT. WAIT

19/02/2024 5:17:06 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> WAIT. WAIT. WAIT

INFINITELY EVILER THING BRO COULD HAVE DONE 2 BETA HAL

19/02/2024 5:19:04 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> turnstechgodhead:

> > WAIT. WAIT. WAIT

> INFINITELY EVILER THING BRO COULD HAVE DONE 2 BETA HAL

19/02/2024 6:31:29 ¶ ●

##

hi. bonzi-hal is the best image i've ever seen. fanart

YES

YOU UNDERSTAND

19/02/2024 6:45:05 ¶ ●

roslyn cassiopeia lalonde and dawn-david evan strider

19/02/2024 7:39:11 ¶ ●

hm… im curious

who do you guys think is my favourite troll

20/02/2024 1:12:42 ¶ ●

<-drawing fight scene is kicking his ass…..

20/02/2024 4:09:14 ¶ ●

another thing i needed to get out of my brain

20/02/2024 16:06:25 ¶ ●

this websites hatemail game is INSANE

21/02/2024 1:08:32 ¶ ●

god i just fucking remembered namco high davesprite

i was soooooo obsessed w him when he came out but i could never play NH

his little birdy sideburns .

he gives me cuteness aggression

21/02/2024 1:24:33 ¶ ● ⬈

turnstechgodhead:

> god i just fucking remembered namco high davesprite

> i was soooooo obsessed w him when he came out but i could never play NH

> his little birdy sideburns .

> he gives me cuteness aggression

#real.#namco high davesprite had me in a chokehold man…

@/hypochodriac

dude fucking fr though

back then when my main was HS-themed i had him on my blog a-la pagedoll and i remember everyone was obsessed with him bc i think it happened during one of the ga-pauses (were still not used to AH not updating all the gd time)

legitimately would kiss him

idk what it is about this particular version of this bird but he’s enchanting. Bewitching

21/02/2024 3:27:44 ¶ ●

would any of yll be interested in art streams at any point

just note it Would be frustrating to watch because i draw with a mouse so itd be slow as fuck sometimes

21/02/2024 3:45:06 ¶ ● ⬈

##

hello dirk! why do yoU look different?

-@uranian-umbra1111

dirk-cubed-ama:

> DIRK: Hey, Calliope. Great question.

> DIRK: The “about” page at the top of the blog gives some insight into this, but I’m happy to spell it out if it means I get to clown on the fucker holding MY chains.

> DIRK: This timeline is not the Homestuck Epilogues.

> DIRK: It’s a sort of “fix-it: character assassination addition” of them, birthed into existence by some self-entitled “kinnie” who decided Canon wasn’t good enough for him.

> DIRK: You heard it here. I’m the product of the millionth fucking “I could do better” Epilogues ego-rewrite, but that aside?

> DIRK: Cosplay didn’t fit my personal villain motif. That weeaboo dipshit decided to half-ass his Ultimate Tier robes when he had the say in what they looked like, that was his choice. (Which, he ended up looking like a gigantic fucking tool. He didn’t even commit to the cosplay, either. A real man would have gone shirtless.)

> DIRK: I’m, however, not him.

> DIRK: And unlike LORD ENGLISH wannabe over there in the neighbor timeline, I at least have the decency to hide the fact that I’m a massive dweeb under layers of ironic symbolism.