That makes sense. I myself I guess am "enduring time" because I'm in a stressful loop that keeps repeating every day and I can't find a way out because I'm not an adult yet. That to me seems like I'm "enduring time"

I don’t want to be in control though. I just want to have fun and see what happens

You gotta take control of your life and make it more healthy for yourself eventually. However, it doesn’t mean you need to be an absolute ruler or anything. In the immortal words of Calliope:

CALLIOPE: i thoUght this encoUnter might,
CALLIOPE: hold some pUrpose for me?
CALLIOPE: that yoU might let me know how i fit into everything, from this moment onward.
[…]
CALLIOPE: bUt then…
CALLIOPE: what shoUld i do?

CALLIOPE: you don’t need to do anything.
CALLIOPE: be who you’ve become, and who i didn’t.
CALLIOPE: consume the fruits of an existence i could never understand.

CALLIOPE: live.

Live your life, and be who you are.