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Hey there!! I just discovered your account, and I was wondering if you'd have any Varlie/Chaggie headcanons?? :00

ckret2:

God, Vaggie is one of those characters that I desperately desperately want to love to death because she hits one of my favorite character tropes, but compared to the other characters I feel like we know so little about her that I can’t like, get her fixed in my mind. Like we’ve got enough info on Alastor you can reasonably construct a fairly fleshed out life history for him but with Vaggie it’s like, “She died in 2014.” “What was she doing before then?” “Living.” So I have a harder time thinking up headcanons that involve her.

But lemme see what I got!! I’m sure I can pull a few things out, lemme see.

- When Vaggie died she spent like one week in Hell and went “this place totally sucks. And like not in the way Hell is supposed to suck, like the fireballs raining from the sky I get but that’s no excuse for the trash lining the streets, the people in charge COULD be providing dozens of social services to make this place better but they’re not,” and she heard that actually the rulers down here are very open to being yelled at by their citizens, so she made her way over to the palace or whatever to give Lucifer The Morning Star The Fallen Angel Ruler Of Hell a piece of her mind like that’s a totally normal thing to do, because like what’s Vaggie got to lose? She’s already dead. What are they gonna do, send her some place worse than literal actual Hell? And instead of Lucifer she gets Charlie, who’s like “HI omigosh you’ve got ideas to make Hell a better place that’s GREAT I want to hear ALL about them I’ve got some ideas too we can brainstorm together I’ll get a note pad and gel pens!” and Vaggie is like this woman is a fusion between Princess Ariel and Pinkie Pie, I can’t yell at her. And that’s how they met. The fact that they met & bonded over Bettering The Community In Hell is absolutely what set them up for later thinking up & establishing the Happy Hotel.

- Before they started dating, every time Vaggie was in between meetings with Charlie, she’d be like “okay this is the daughter of the devil and that probably makes her literally the antichrist so it doesn’t matter how cute she is or how sweet she acts you’ve GOTTA stay wary around her you’ve GOTTA keep your guard up” and every time she saw Charlie again the attempt to be On Her Guard lasted like five minutes.

- Vaggie actually enjoys singing and dancing, just like—in private? Or in places designed for singing and dancing? Like karaoke bars or clubs? Sometimes Charlie will be like “A crowded street during rush hour, this is the PERFECT time for a romantic duet, C'MON” and Vaggie’s just “babe noooooo
” But Charlie is a merciful devil. No force in Heaven nor Hell can stop Charlie from singing, but she won’t drag Vaggie into it against her will. Usually.

- The biggest cultural gap in Hell is between the hellborn demons and the other infernal/celestial figures that hang around them (ex: Stolas’s family, imps, or fallen angel Lucifer) on the one side, and then dead human sinners on the other side. Charlie is one of the very few on the demon side of the divide that’s reached out to the human side—and despite “is this girl the little mermaid?” comparisons she knows basically as much about mortal human life on Earth as anyone can know without ever once having actually been to Earth, because she’s hundreds of years old and has spent as much of that time as possible in human culture, grilling humans on everything about themselves and what their life on the other side had been like. So Charlie can pretty comfortably move around in otherwise 100% human social circles, with the only potential impediment to that being her celebrity status and her tendency to break out into Disney-worthy musical numbers. And she blends in with the humans so well that every once in a while Vaggie will straight up forget that Charlie isn’t and has never been human and isn’t about Vaggie’s age, and she’ll be startled every time she’s somehow re-reminded of this fact. (“Yeah one of my earliest memories is making goodie bags to welcome new arrivals from the French famine!” “The—the which famine?” “The one in 1693! I don’t know what I was doing during the 1709 one, that might’ve been around when I started school? I’d have to do the math, I was still pretty young—”)

- Vaggie, on the other hand, cannot move around nearly as comfortably in demon circles—because demons are elitist douchewads who think pathetic little mortals are little better than briefly-amusing playthings. Charlie tried exactly one time to bring Vaggie to some sort of fancy upper-crust-of-demon-society social event. Someone made some snide comment about the little human toy Charlie had brought along, how charming; and that was the first time Vaggie saw Charlie go into full fangs-and-horns Total Demon Mode, and also the first time Vaggie had to hold Charlie back from starting a fight. As they were leaving they overheard another snob scoffing like “well what can you expect from her, her mother used to be human and her father is an ANGEL of all things—” and then it was Charlie’s turn to hold Vaggie back. And now they don’t go to demon events!!