( cue extreme, dramatic sighing. vaas is upset, sure, but making him not upset is a damn easy thing if you happen to be handsome jack. what a fucking asshole, right? vaas reaches somewhere off-camera, and then returns his arm to frame with a maliwan rifle in sight. that, of course, is followed by a very necessary flick off. )
really?? hmm, you might have to tattoo your name on me, amigo. are you really going to come visit this fucking time? last time you said that, you left me hanging. i was heart broken. so
bring me fruit, motherfucker!! just make sure it is juicy.
(cute. jack returns the gesture with a smirking glare.)
you must be a mind-reader or something– i was just thinking about that, it’s goddamn uncanny– except i’d use something a lot more fun than ink. hot poker maybe. big red letters. right on your ass. you’d have to stay very still, though, no squirming. (he’s put some thought into this)
(he laughs, haughtily) it’s not my fault, i’m a busy man!! but uuuh, i’m sure i can slip out for a bit. i’m tired of paperwork and i could use the distraction; as long as you promise to show me a good time.