May 2015

asthehero:

Yeaaaaah, you doooo. [ SINGSONGS AT HIM ] Don’t lie to me, it’s more trouble than you need.

I can’t promise a vacation, like. Not in the biblical sense of the word, but I think I’ve got a super special someone I could introduce you too. Make it worth his while, and he miiiiight – note the MIGHT, babe – put up with you wanting to work on your tanlines and get filthy fucking drunk.

Hell– if he can get me away from Helios for a couple days– no scratch that, weeks– I’ll give him anything he friggin’ wants.

Soooooo what’re we talkin’ here? He the cold hard cash type? ‘Cause I am rollin’ in it, baby– and that shit is no object when my tan lines are involved. Gotta keep up this devastatingly handsome image, you feel me.
Also, if this guy’s anything like the last ‘friend’ you introduced me to, I’m gonna need something a lot stronger than rum.