## Thursday, March 26, 2009

### Scourge Chat Log #2

Here's another one I scrounged up. A bit shorter than the first one but it still "brings the lulz" as you kids say these days.
[Killzone’jaeden]: ...and that's how I spent three weeks selling fire extinguishers in Gnomeregan.
[theLichKing]: Hahaha! Oh man, in context it makes perfect sense.
[Killzone’jaeden]: So on a completely unrelated note
[Killzone’jaeden]: When are you planning to get off your ass and help us out with some Burning Crusade action
[theLichKing]: Man, I already told you
[theLichKing]: I don't do that shit anymore
[theLichKing]: I'm all about the freezing. It's, like, the _opposite_ of burning.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Please
[theLichKing]: No
[Killzone’jaeden]: Please
[theLichKing]: NO! Dude if you can't let this go, I'm logging off right now.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Man what is your deal...I don't see why you can't crusade just a little
[Killzone’jaeden]: Start the occasional bonfire
[Killzone’jaeden]: Light a scented candle once in a while...every tiny bit helps
[Killzone’jaeden]: Why won't you serve me?
[theLichKing]: You mean aside from the hideous, horrific torture?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Yeah besides that
[theLichKing]: Ok look. The whole Burning Crusade is stupid.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Why?
[theLichKing]: You have no endgame.
[Killzone’jaeden]: *cough*DestroyEveryLivingThingInTheUniverse*cough*
[theLichKing]: Ok, then what?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Then I dance on Aegwynn's corpse.
[theLichKing]: Um...ok. Then what?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Well, I'm going to be doing that for a pretty long time.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Like, three years.
[Killzone’jaeden]: I plan to really make the most of my corpse-dancing potential. I have sort of a gift, you know?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Plus Aegwynn is *such* a bitch
[theLichKing]: THEN WHAT
[Killzone’jaeden]: Dude, I dunno
[Killzone’jaeden]: Cross-stitch?
***User "Sindragosa1337" has entered the chat.***
[Sindragosa1337]: wh4t 1s up p33ps
[Sindragosa1337]: i h4ve a ?
[Sindragosa1337]: lets say hyp0theticaly, youd slaught3r3d somewhere in the neighborh00d of... lets say... 1,200 dwarves
[Killzone’jaeden]: Been there.
[Sindragosa1337]: and it was m3ssy
[theLichKing]: Done that.
[Sindragosa1337]: and now j00 cannot get t3h blood off ur talons
[Sindragosa1337]: r3commend a cleaning pr0duct for this hypothetical situation pl0x
[Killzone’jaeden]: Dwarf blood is notoriously difficult to remove. I recommend soaking in vinegar.
[Sindragosa1337]: o rly?
[Killzone’jaeden]: NOPE!
[Killzone’jaeden]: I WAS LYING! Vinegar will have NO EFFECT
[Killzone’jaeden]: See I DECEIVED YOU
[Killzone’jaeden]: Cuz I'm THE DECEIVER
[Killzone’jaeden]: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha
[Killzone’jaeden]: *sigh* I have never known true intimacy.
[Sindragosa1337]: hey are j00 still cross-dress1ng these days?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Oh you know it.
[Sindragosa1337]: w4nt to borrow my l1pst1ck?
[Sindragosa1337]: i dont n33d it anym0re due to a lack of l1ps
[Killzone’jaeden]: Hells to the yes please.
[theLichKing]: WTF is wrong with you
[Killzone’jaeden]: I'm not actually going to wear the lipstick. I just say things like that because it's liberating.
[Sindragosa1337]: hes r1ght
[Sindragosa1337]: break1ng d0wn stere0types
[Killzone’jaeden]: "I loved Sex and the City."
[Sindragosa1337]: "i urin4t3 standing up"
[Killzone’jaeden]: Try it
[theLichKing]: NO
[Killzone’jaeden]: "I call up my friends just to talk."
[Sindragosa1337]: "i h4v3 a genuine interest in the 0utcome of footb4ll games"
[Killzone’jaeden]: "I honestly believe that lavender and mauve are different things."
[Sindragosa1337]: "burp1ng is rel3vant to my 1nterests"
[theLichKing]: I'm not pretending I'm a woman.
[Killzone’jaeden]: So just say something random then. It'll make you feel better.
[theLichKing]: Ugh... like what?
[Killzone’jaeden]: I don't know.
[Killzone’jaeden]: How about...
[Killzone’jaeden]: "At night, I look upon potatoes with lust in my eyes."
[Sindragosa1337]: rofl
[theLichKing]: What does that even mean? That doesn't mean anything.
[theLichKing]: I'm not saying that.
[Killzone’jaeden]: You don't have to say it...just type it
[Sindragosa1337]: wh4ts teh harm
[Killzone’jaeden]: It's just us.
[Sindragosa1337]: th3r3 is n0thing to ph33r
[Killzone’jaeden]: Do it
[Sindragosa1337]: do it
[Killzone’jaeden]: Do it
[Sindragosa1337]: do it
[Sindragosa1337]: d0 33t
[Killzone’jaeden]: You don't even have to type it. Just copy and paste. "At night, I look upon potatoes with lust in my eyes."
[Killzone’jaeden]: You *know* you want to.
[theLichKing]: FINE. Just to make you guys stfu.
***User "Kel'Thuz4d" has entered the chat.***
[theLichKing]: At night, I look upon potatoes with lust in my eyes.
[Kel’Thuz4d]: TMIgeddon
***User "Kel'Thuz4d" has left the chat.***
[theLichKing]: OMG
[Killzone’jaeden]: OMFG
[Sindragosa1337]: z0mg
[Sindragosa1337]: 3pic
[Sindragosa1337]: 3p1c
[theLichKing]: *WRATH*
[Sindragosa1337]: Th1s 1s a gr34t day 1n h15t0ry
[Killzone’jaeden]: Hey you should probably get that fixed by the way
[Sindragosa1337]: wh4t?
[Killzone’jaeden]: Whatever it is about your keyboard that's making you sound like a fucktard
[Killzone’jaeden]: By confusing Arabic numerals with the effing Roman alphabet.
[Sindragosa1337]: its called 1337
[Killzone’jaeden]: What a coincidence
[Killzone’jaeden]: One thousand, three hundred thirty-seven is the exact number of dumbass script kiddies I crushed into oblivion yesterday.
***User "Kel'Thuz4d" has entered the chat.***
[Kel’Thuz4d]: *eyes LK uncertainly*
[theLichKing]: *eyes Kelthuzad uncertainly*
[Kel’Thuz4d]: We will never speak of it again.
[Sindragosa1337]: hey k3lly i have a ?
[theLichKing]: *sigh* To remove dwarf blood, soak in hydrogen peroxide then sacrifice a goat to Aule.
[Sindragosa1337]: 0h tnx
[Sindragosa1337]: but th4t wasnt my ? this tim3
[Sindragosa1337]: im just cur10us wh4t its lik3 to b3 a fightable b0ss
[Sindragosa1337]: im kind4 nerv0us
[Kel’Thuz4d]: ok remember when you died
[Sindragosa1337]: um yah
[Kel’Thuz4d]: imagine that, eighty times a day
[Sindragosa1337]: 0uch
[Kel’Thuz4d]: actually its not so bad
[Kel’Thuz4d]: its fun when raids wipe
[Killzone’jaeden]: Yeah and you can always tell which guilds are going to suck
[Killzone’jaeden]: Rule of Guild Names: The more awesome the guild name tries to sound, the more the guild sucks.
[Killzone’jaeden]: If I see, like, "Lords Of Chaos And Darkness"... done
[Killzone’jaeden]: "The Right Hand Of God"... they don't even make it through the instance
[Killzone’jaeden]: But if I ever see, like, "Ain't Misbehavin"
[Killzone’jaeden]: I'm like SHIT
[Sindragosa1337]: XD
[Kel’Thuz4d]: hey sindragosa have you seen anub'arak
[Sindragosa1337]: n0pe
[Sindragosa1337]: i think he h4s a l1vej0urnal though
[Sindragosa1337]: try se4rching the web
[Sindragosa1337]: haha get it "web"
[Kel’Thuz4d]: you cant be making fun of him just bc hes a spider
[Sindragosa1337]: y n0t?
[Kel’Thuz4d]: weve been over this...remember ur sensitivity training
[Sindragosa1337]: oh i am s3nsitive...dr4gons are a pr0ud peopl3 with a rich cultur4l heritage
[Sindragosa1337]: r4cism is a srs issue
[Sindragosa1337]: phylumism is just hil4rious
[Sindragosa1337]: "hey look at me im all cool, >8< spider pride"
[Sindragosa1337]: "oh no something larger than a golf ball"
[Sindragosa1337]: "eeek ~8~ spider squish"
[Kel’Thuz4d]: :-O
[theLichKing]: Hey show a little respect for diversity
[Sindragosa1337]: "hmmm a complex problem, let me solve it"
[Sindragosa1337]: "oh wait i dont have a prefrontal cortex"
[Sindragosa1337]: "guess ill just twitch like usual"
[Killzone’jaeden]: OMG
[Sindragosa1337]: wyrms before worms amirite
[theLichKing]: Not appropriate at all
[Kel’Thuz4d]: like seriously
[Killzone’jaeden]: We were just joking before.
[theLichKing]: The Scourge does not condone this sort of thing.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Or the Legion.
[theLichKing]: At all.
[Killzone’jaeden]: At all.
[Kel’Thuz4d]: dont hate
[theLichKing]: I'm out of here.
[Killzone’jaeden]: Yeah me too.
[Kel’Thuz4d]: 4 reals
***User "Kel'Thuz4d" has left the chat.***
***User "theLichKing" has left the chat.***
***User "Killzone'jaeden" has left the chat.***
[Sindragosa1337]: *looks around*
[Sindragosa1337]: Whose woods these are I think I know
[Sindragosa1337]: His house is
[Sindragosa1337]: Fuck it.
***User "Sindragosa1337" has left the chat.***

#### 29 comments:

Anonymous said...

  Fisrt?
  Man, I like to read it! Really good idea that of yours. Keep it going! x)
  See ya! And thanks for that. :)

  March 27, 2009 at 12:49 AM
Anonymous said...

  Keep up the hilarity

  March 29, 2009 at 1:11 PM
Anonymous said...

  Awesome lol. Keep making them and keep advertising it on the forums =D

  March 30, 2009 at 8:44 AM
Anonymous said...

  Best thing ever... >8< spider pride!
  Please continue!

  March 30, 2009 at 1:12 PM
Anonymous said...

  Sindragosa quoting Robert Frost. Omg O_O

  March 30, 2009 at 1:59 PM
Anonymous said...

  I think it was better without the swearing.

  March 30, 2009 at 7:12 PM
Molinu said...

  Loved the "Rule of Guild Names"!

  March 30, 2009 at 11:41 PM
Anonymous said...

  Dude...
  [Killzone’jaeden]: But if I ever see, like, "Ain't Misbehavin"
  [Killzone’jaeden]: I'm like SHIT
  That had me in tears...
  Please keep it coming! :)

  March 31, 2009 at 10:27 AM
Anonymous said...

  [Sindragosa1337]: "oh no something larger than a golf ball"
  [Sindragosa1337]: "eeek ~8~ spider squish"
  :')

  March 31, 2009 at 2:11 PM
Kardall said...

  Simply awesome. I love it all. Need to get Jinx to hook you up with some >8< Spider Pride tee's and stuff... Maybe put anub's head on it, with a spiderweb on the bottom right corner or something... I could do something up but... mmm maybe I will and I'll post a reply in here...

  March 31, 2009 at 7:03 PM
Marzenia said...

  Sindragosa1337 should keep going:
  The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
  But I have promises to keep,
  And miles to go before I sleep,
  And miles to go before I sleep.
  I love scourge chat log! Give moar!

  April 10, 2009 at 7:33 AM
Aislinna said...

  Hmm. Isn't theLichKing supposed to be like, afraid of Killzone’jaeden? They sound so chummy now...

  April 11, 2009 at 11:01 AM
Anonymous said...

  "~*`Sylvanas'*~"
  Missed her :(
  Awesome one though keep it up!

  April 12, 2009 at 4:12 PM
Anonymous said...

  have horde or alliance chat too, like horde not liking the BE's and a bit coutious towards the forsaken.

  April 13, 2009 at 5:35 PM
Pinkfinger said...

  Oh man, in context it makes perfect sense
  lol

  April 14, 2009 at 4:10 PM
Anonymous said...

  I liked it more without all the swearing.
  Just my 2c

  April 24, 2009 at 4:27 AM
Bunny said...

  [Sindragosa1337]: "hmmm a complex problem, let me solve it"
  [Sindragosa1337]: "oh wait i dont have a prefrontal cortex"
  [Sindragosa1337]: "guess ill just twitch like usual"
  Still has me in tears every time I read this long.

  April 26, 2009 at 6:24 AM
Treeston said...

  wyrms before worms amirite

  July 5, 2009 at 1:00 PM
spclausen said...

  "oh wait i dont have a prefrontal cortex"
  LOL

  July 7, 2009 at 2:33 PM
Anonymous said...

  Sindragosa is the bomb haha
  [Sindragosa1337]: r4cism is a srs issue
  [Sindragosa1337]: phylumism is just hil4rious

  November 30, 2009 at 4:26 PM
Anonymous said...

  sorry but "rule of guild names"...incorrect...
  one of the most reputable guilds on the server barthalais...is Kaos... they are 4/5 TOGC and normally have people pulling 6-9k dps on pugs...(i love it when they join mine!!)

  December 8, 2009 at 7:26 PM
Anonymous said...

  Anonymous said...
  sorry but "rule of guild names"...incorrect...
  one of the most reputable guilds on the server barthalais...is Kaos... they are 4/5 TOGC and normally have people pulling 6-9k dps on pugs...(i love it when they join mine!!)
  ^^ Fail

  January 15, 2010 at 4:40 PM
Anonymous said...

  Seriously, reading that and you didn't crack up? The only thing you can come up with is a take on guild names? Ooh 6-9k dps. Get over yourself. Take your undies out of your butt and laugh a little

  April 6, 2010 at 12:36 AM
Tammyfae said...

  lol "aint Misbehavin", fantastic.

  April 14, 2010 at 11:09 AM
Unknown said...

  lolz it's very hilarious..
  can i ask u guys 1 question?
  i came from non-english speaking country, and i dont understand the slang about "At night, I look upon potatoes with lust in my eyes" means..
  anyone can tell me?

  August 11, 2010 at 1:32 PM
Anonymous said...

  @duy_duyz - It's simply a random thing for them to ask the Lich King to say. It's supposed to be utterly nonsensical, and a little strange.

  September 21, 2010 at 3:42 PM
Anonymous said...

  [Killzone’jaeden]: Yeah and you can always tell which guilds are going to suck
  [Killzone’jaeden]: Rule of Guild Names: The more awesome the guild name tries to sound, the more the guild sucks.
  [Killzone’jaeden]: If I see, like, "Lords Of Chaos And Darkness"... done
  [Killzone’jaeden]: "The Right Hand Of God"... they don't even make it through the instance
  [Killzone’jaeden]: But if I ever see, like, "Ain't Misbehavin"
  [Killzone’jaeden]: I'm like SHIT
  I cant read this log and without laughing ! GREAT GREAT GREAT !

  November 3, 2010 at 5:17 PM
Anonymous said...

  I find this very funny... because it's awesome. :D

  December 4, 2010 at 11:11 AM
Anonymous said...

  You must be so fun at parties. People IRL swear, get over it.

  January 1, 2013 at 5:26 PM

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