The Entities’ Non-Smirke Names, Rated

Wow, there’s a lot. The Hunt and the Slaughter have none, though the Hunt’s ritual is the Everchase. This is a long post.

Buried

The Center: 2/5 not very scary or dramatic

Choke: 1/5 feels like either the Hunt or, well, something decidedly non-eldritch

Too Close I Cannot Breathe: 4/5 very dramatic but not a good name for the entity

Forever Deep Below Creation: 5/5 good job Jon you made the best name, dramatic, descriptive, everything

Corruption

Filth: 2/5 I guess it’s evocative, but come on, Gertrude. I know you’re practical, but…

Crawling Rot: 5/5 sums up, as Jon puts it, ‘bugs and bad smells’; evokes the image of rot crawling

Dark

Mr. Pitch: 1/5 I agree with Manuela that this just isn’t scary anymore.

Forever Blind: 3/5 Dramatic? Yes. Scary? No. To be fair, it is a very one-note fear.

Desolation

I just want to point out that desolation is already dramatic, and then they made  7 other names for it. We all talk about Eye avatars being dramatic, but wow.

The Lightless Flame: 3/5 points off because it sounds like it could be about the Dark, as someone else pointed out

The Torturing Flame: 4/5 Better! More Desolation-y, less Dark!.

The Devastation: 3/5 points off for sounding too much like desolation

The Blackened Earth: 4/5 this is so dramatic

Asag: 1/5 just some obscure god no one knows about

The Ravening Burn: 2/5 I had to look up ravening. It’s similar to ravenous, meaning ferociously hungry. Good description but too obscure a word.

End

Death: 2/5 pretty literal, but better than the next one since it’s Germanic

Terminus: 1/5 too literal! That’s just…end. In Latin.

The Coming End That Waits For Us All And Cannot Be Ignored: 4/5 what the heck? What the heck? They hit us with this? After Death and Terminus? Then they just hit us with the most dramatic thing ever? Sadly, points off for being too long.

Eye

This was the only one where I was able to name all the names of the entity. What does that say about me? I don’t know.

Beholding: 3/5 Dramatic. Often used by people writing fanfics as if it were the main name, which is fine, except Jon calls it the Eye most of the time.

Ceaseless Watcher: 4/5 More dramatic! Smiting time! Also just very descriptive of the Eye.

It Knows You: 3/5 The phrase ones are not as good usually, as it’s odd as a name. But this is still fun to say dramatically.

Flesh

Viscera: 2/5 I was going to say that’s what flesh is, but viscera is organs while flesh is muscle and fat, or meat. Too Latin-y.

The Body Consumed: 2/5 I’ve never heard this one at all. But it sounds like it could be Desolation, or Corruption, or even Stranger. Too ambiguous.

Hunt, Slaughter: none

Lonely

Forsaken: 3/5 I’ve seen people use this for the Lonely’s realm, the one that Jon rescues Martin from. The Left Behind. It’s very sad. Not full marks, though.

The One Alone: 5/5 Somehow it just has the right name. I don’t know why, but that just feels like the right name. Possibly it’s because it’s one, singular, and then alone. Evocative.

Spiral

Twisting Deceit: 4/5 gets the twisty part in for the Spiral, then the lying part. Good, but not amazing. Too straightforward, since it’s the spiral.

It Is Lies: 4/5 Dramatic. I can imagine someone shouting that, or this being scrawled on the walls of Michael’s halls. (Ooh, rhymes.)

It Is Not What It Is: 4/5 Properly paradoxical. Although, it almost sounds like it could be Stranger, what with the Not!Them.

Stranger

I Do Not Know You: 3/5 Straightforward. But it’s the Stranger. It shouldn’t be straightforward.

Vast

The Falling Titan: 3/5 But see, a giant’s not falling; you are. This is like the sky eating the guy. It doesn’t quite get it right.

The Awful Deep: 4/5 Very dramatic, especially in Jon’s Statement Voice. Imagine him saying it in his Ritual Statement Voice, ooh, sends shivers down my spine. Helps that he rounds the ah in awful for whatever reason. (It helps for whatever reason—I know why he rounds the ah!)

Web

There were a few very similar ones. Also, Annabelle must really call the Web a lot of things, since I’ve heard of almost none of these, and I’m up to 167-ish.

The Great Spider: 3/5 Too literal and comprehensible.

The Mother of Puppets: 3/5 Too complicated, sort of? Why is it a mother? It’s not a puppetmaster but a puppetmaker?

The Spinner of Schemes: 4/5 Very evocative. Threads and webs and plots and whatnot.

The Story Spinner: 3/5 Not very scary.

The Hidden Machination: 3/5 My immediate thought was why one machination? Also, too Latin-y to be properly evocative.