2025-08-04 1:11:21 ¶ ●

What The Magnus Archives characters would do with “The Sims” headcanons

Jon - Jon gets stuck on the character design section. He ends up being worried about the Sim’s outfit going together and then he’s super indecisive about hairstyles and accessories. He end’s up being overwhelmed immediately.

Martin - Martin makes a sim couple with the intent of having very mundane gameplay. However, everything somehow spirals and he ends up with one of his sim’s mass collecting everything there is to find in the world and his other Sim making non-stop cups of tea to get rid of that stupid caffeine crash moodlet.

Tim - Tim makes himself then gets into antics. Sometimes he wohoo’s the entire town. Sometimes he tries to max out skills that he’ll probably never take up in real life. Sometimes he works more normal jobs for catharsis.

Sasha - Sasha plays with mod’s. She has so many on her computer that it runs hotter than a car engine, but her favorite is her mod settings menu. She’s practical about sorting her unhinged mods like that.

Melanie - Ironically, Melanie really likes Supernatural gameplay even after everything that went down with The Institute. She really likes playing as a witch or a werewolf and then having them have insane encounters like getting abducted by aliens or planting a plant sim.

Georgie - Georgie always starts out with the mindset of “I’m going to make a Sim and play them normally,” then within 30 minutes she’s enabled every cheat in the game because she gets bored with mundane gameplay. So what if she wants to make her Sim a millionaire who can afford everything in the game ten times over?

Basira - Basira is always doing some kind of challenge. Whether it’s a legacy run or a zombie apocalypse challenge she always enjoys the game the most when it has a clear set of rules.

Daisy - Daisy is a completionist. She has to collect all the things, and max out all the skills, and earn the rewards, and work all the jobs, and earn enough money naturally in the game to buy all the things. She takes The Sims very seriously.

Peter - Peter makes a version of the apartment complex he wanted to build and lives out the dream that Gertrude killed. That is, until Gertrude finds out what he’s doing on the game and calls the papers again to tell them that Peter is doing a “trial run” of his plan. Thus, the think pieces start up again.

Elias - Elias can’t play The Sims for more than a few hours without getting bored and making a whole new story and starting a whole new life. He’s never played the game for an entire Sim’s lifetime.

Gertrude - When The Sims was first released in the year 2000 Gertrude was the first person to realize that you can drown a Sim by removing the ladder. She’s used The Sim’s plenty to plot some of her most impressive fear related takedowns.

Gerard - He makes a little sim family and then plays a shockingly mundane game of their day to day. It seems like normal gameplay at first, but the more you think about the more you’ll be convinced he needs therapy.

Michael - Michael Shelley likes to make things in build mode. He spends hours making little houses and perfecting cozy rooms that he’d love to inhabit. Distortion Michael likes to build too. Though in a different way. It likes to make confusing, uninhabitable, hallways for his Sims to traverse through.

2025-08-21 0:30:52 ¶ ●

Jon and Tim will never not have an insane dynamic to me.

They aren’t even friends for 2/3 of the seasons of they interact, and yet when Tim dies it kills Jon’s humanity.
Not in a metaphorical sense either. In a quite literal sense as the events of the series are: Tim detonates off a bomb. The explosion kills him and mortally injuries Jon in a way that would have killed anyone else. Therefore, Jon has to give up his humanity and become an avatar to pull through.

Jon ending up as The Archivist is a direct consequence of him telling Tim to pull the trigger. It’s a direct consequence of him letting Tim go so he can keep an eye on him instead of leaving him back at The Institute.

It’s a direct consequence of him losing another friend.

Nearly everything that happens in Season 4 and 5 is because of the moment Jon and Tim’s arc come to end and their friendship ends for good. I know the phrase “haunt the narrative” gets tossed around a lot, but Tim really does haunt the rest of the series of the form of the numerus consequences that come from the aftermath of The Unknowing.

And quite frankly I don’t think Tim would want to haunt Jon is any other way.

2025-08-23 0:19:10 ¶ ●

TMA characters but it’s just media that I’ve hyperfixated on before that I think they’d like:

RIP Jonathan Sims, you would have loved “Marble Hornets.”

RIP Martin Blackwood, you would have loved “Undertale.”

RIP Tim Stoker, you would have loved “Date Everything.”

RIP Sasha James, you would have loved “Gravity Falls.”

RIP Basira Hussain, you would have loved “Squid Games.”

RIP Daisy Tonner, you would have loved “The Wolf Amoung Us.”

RIP Georgie Barker, you would have loved “Scooby Doo.”

RIP Melanie King, you would have loved “Telltale’s Batman.” / RIP Melanie King, you would have loved “Bojack Horseman.”

RIP Gertrude Robinson, you would have loved “World Of Zoo.”

RIP Gerard Keay, you would have loved “Supernatural.”

RIP Michael Shelley, you would have loved the “Life Is Strange” franchise.

RIP Annabelle Cane, you would have loved “The Sims.”

2025-08-29 1:06:32 ¶ ●

The Magnus Archives but it’s what I think a Not Them version of each character would be like.

A Not Them version of Jon would be a signifyingly worst Archivist but a better stalker. They’d ramp up surveillance on members of The Institute, both to monitor them on the circus’s behalf, and to increase Tim, Sasha, and Martin’s paranoia as they start noticing “Jon” lurking around their private lives more often.

A Not Them version of Martin slightly sabotages Jon in ways that increases his paranoia but aren’t overt enough to get on Tim and Sasha’s radar. They add a small amount of salt to his tea. They “accidentally” break some of Jon’s tape recorders. They stare at him for just a little too long. It sets Jon on edge and it makes Sasha and Tim even more distrusting of Jon because from their perspective he’s being overly suspicious of sweet Martin for no reason.

A Not Them version of Melanie King is extremely accommodating and kind to Jon. They bring him snacks unprompted. They help Jon tidy his desk before work. They bring him small gifts that they think he’ll enjoy. It freaks Jon all the way out because he knew how Melanie felt about him before her sudden shift in personality, but Basira, Daisy, Martin and Tim keep brushing him off because “Why are you scared and agitated that Melanie wants to be your friend?”

A Not Them version of Tim Stoker get’s really into clowns and circuses all the sudden. They starts decorating their desk in odd clown memorabilia and when their coworkers ask what that’s about they just shrugs and says it’s a new hobby of theirs. Jon wouldn’t think too much about it since Tim could be a bit excitable in the past, but he’s also noticed that they’re being FAR more open about Danny than they ever have been before. They even go into unsettling details about his death. Something that Jon notes as particularly weird after Tim spent years not mentioning that he had a sibling.

A Not Them version of Elias Bouchard sabotages the Institute workers jobs. Jon comes into work and finds a bunch of statements related to The Strangers have been misplaced. Martin goes to take a follow up statement on “Elias’s” request and finds himself at the address of an decrepit building, meanwhile Jon is getting himself into trouble. Sasha keeps finding things missing in artifact storage, and Tim has been demoted from doing anything even slightly important.

A Not Them version of Peter Lucas starts to hang around The Institute a lot. They’re always in Elias’s office to talk about “updates” on the circus situation, or just hanging around the break room trying to ask Martin how stopping The Unknowing’s going. They’re just this looming presence that no one in the main cast knows what to make of.

A Not Them version of Gertrude starts to send her assistants on more and more terrifying tasks. They ask Eric to stick his arm in the mouth of a flesh creature to “make sure nothing’s in there.” They ask Fiona to work in the dark because “studies have shown it increases productivity.” They give Michael conflicting and confusing tasks that he could never actually complete then act disappointed when he “fails.” They fed off the fear of Gertrude’s assistants like a five course meal.

A Not Them version of Daisy encourages Jon to add less security to The Archives since they’re there to protect everyone now. They don’t need all the sprinklers, or panic rooms, or fire extinguishers. All they need is good old reliable Daisy.
A Not Them version of Basira is extremely encouraging of Jon to put himself in danger to find answers. They tell him it wouldn’t be a half bad idea to explore the theater alone since, “less numbers mean less of a chance of getting caught.” They tell him that if they find the singing coffin he, Martin, Tim, and Sasha should consider going inside so “they know for sure what’s in there.” They tell him that he should handle the artifacts in storage more to make sure they don’t have any answers. They’re Jon’s worst enabler so they can fed off the fear that comes from his bad decisions.

A Not Them version of Georgie really wants to be involved with Jon’s statements all of the sudden. They start sitting with him while he reads, and asking him follow up questions because they’re just so nervous about what Jon’s got himself into. Jon is so happy to have the support that he would completely unaware that anything was wrong if The Admiral didn’t start hissing at Georgie all the sudden.

A Not Them version of Gerard Keay starts to collect Leitner’s instead of burning them. They tell Gertrude that they should rethink the way they view Leitner’s as they could be used if they were hoarded while they can’t if they’re discarded. Gertrude catches on within a day.