2025-01-22 3:18:30 ¶ ●

Sasha says Distortion! Michael is around 6'5.

When I first read TMA I assumed Michael’s large height was because he was a monster. However, on further thought, I think it’s funnier if his height is like his laugh, where it was just like that.

Like, imagine becoming a monster and everyone is like “When I saw the way he towered over me, I knew he couldn’t be human,” but that’s actually just a remainder of when you were just a guy who had long limbs.

On a more meta note: I also like this headcanon because I think it makes sense in a character commentary way. Throughout the series, The Spiral keeps insisting that it’s not Michael. And while that seems true in most ways, it also doesn’t seem to be the full story given how different Helen and Michael’s versions of The Spiral are. So, from a character commentary standpoint, there’s something to be said about the idea of people mistaking The Spiral’s features for monstrous elements when really they’re just remnants of Michael’s existence.

Anyway, this post is basically me making a headcanon and then thinking way to much about it. Which I argue are the funniest type of headcanons, but still.