August 2025

What The Magnus Archives characters would do with “The Sims” headcanons

Jon - Jon gets stuck on the character design section. He ends up being worried about the Sim’s outfit going together and then he’s super indecisive about hairstyles and accessories. He end’s up being overwhelmed immediately.

Martin - Martin makes a sim couple with the intent of having very mundane gameplay. However, everything somehow spirals and he ends up with one of his sim’s mass collecting everything there is to find in the world and his other Sim making non-stop cups of tea to get rid of that stupid caffeine crash moodlet.

Tim - Tim makes himself then gets into antics. Sometimes he wohoo’s the entire town. Sometimes he tries to max out skills that he’ll probably never take up in real life. Sometimes he works more normal jobs for catharsis.

Sasha - Sasha plays with mod’s. She has so many on her computer that it runs hotter than a car engine, but her favorite is her mod settings menu. She’s practical about sorting her unhinged mods like that.

Melanie - Ironically, Melanie really likes Supernatural gameplay even after everything that went down with The Institute. She really likes playing as a witch or a werewolf and then having them have insane encounters like getting abducted by aliens or planting a plant sim.

Georgie - Georgie always starts out with the mindset of “I’m going to make a Sim and play them normally,” then within 30 minutes she’s enabled every cheat in the game because she gets bored with mundane gameplay. So what if she wants to make her Sim a millionaire who can afford everything in the game ten times over?

Basira - Basira is always doing some kind of challenge. Whether it’s a legacy run or a zombie apocalypse challenge she always enjoys the game the most when it has a clear set of rules.

Daisy - Daisy is a completionist. She has to collect all the things, and max out all the skills, and earn the rewards, and work all the jobs, and earn enough money naturally in the game to buy all the things. She takes The Sims very seriously.

Peter - Peter makes a version of the apartment complex he wanted to build and lives out the dream that Gertrude killed. That is, until Gertrude finds out what he’s doing on the game and calls the papers again to tell them that Peter is doing a “trial run” of his plan. Thus, the think pieces start up again.

Elias - Elias can’t play The Sims for more than a few hours without getting bored and making a whole new story and starting a whole new life. He’s never played the game for an entire Sim’s lifetime.

Gertrude - When The Sims was first released in the year 2000 Gertrude was the first person to realize that you can drown a Sim by removing the ladder. She’s used The Sim’s plenty to plot some of her most impressive fear related takedowns.

Gerard - He makes a little sim family and then plays a shockingly mundane game of their day to day. It seems like normal gameplay at first, but the more you think about the more you’ll be convinced he needs therapy.

Michael - Michael Shelley likes to make things in build mode. He spends hours making little houses and perfecting cozy rooms that he’d love to inhabit. Distortion Michael likes to build too. Though in a different way. It likes to make confusing, uninhabitable, hallways for his Sims to traverse through.

“The Subway” but it’s season 4 and 5 Basira and Daisy. Especially this section in particular:

“Made you the villain, evil for just moving on.” - Basira being upset that Daisy wanted to move on from being an Avatar of Hunt (or more specifically being her protector) at the cost of her own life.

“I see your shadow. I see it even with the lights off.” - Basira chasing Daisy’s monstrous form through the apocalypse.

“I made a promise” - Basira shooting Daisy because she promised too.

“If in four months this feeling ain’t gone, well, fuck this city. I’m movin’ to Saskatchewan.” - Basira helping to stop the apocalypse and having to move on with her life without Daisy afterwards.