2025-09-02 12:12:15 ¶ ●

saw a friend for coffee yesterday and we started talking about halloween since they are gonna be hosting this year. decided fuck it i’m gonna be jon, like two people there will get it but who cares. anyway i slept terribly last night for unrelated reasons and now i’m just sat at my desk looking at things for the cosplay…

2025-09-05 21:34:09 ¶ ●

behold, oh ye of little faith! i finally wrote some jmart. established relationship teacher sickfic, be upon you! usual archive lock warning applies.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/70388396

2025-09-13 16:46:43 ¶ ●

if i belonged to one of the fears in tma, it would almost certainly be the Vast, as i am scared of thunderstorms (particularly the sound of thunder). being from England it’s not something that i have to deal with often, since we don’t get them that much here, apart from this summer where it feels like we’ve had at least one every handful of weeks.

all that having been said, why, dear God WHY, does the thunder have to come whenever i am listening to tma?? it’s never at any other time, and it’s not like i spend my whole day listening to podcasts. the vast is taunting me? what the hell man.

2025-09-19 13:11:46 ¶ ●

cons of this week: i’ve been in bed sick as anything for three days straight.

pros of this week: i may or may not have convinced a friend to get (back) into tma by sending them one (1) fanfic.

2025-09-19 13:17:09 ¶ ●

think i’m on the up from said illness now so i’m gently returning to writing today, thinking about my current shorter wip and how it’s probably going to have to be canon divergent instead of compliant, which i guess gives me more creative control. Don’t know what it is about this wip, i like the ideas but the execution isn’t working. wondering if i should switch povs? it was originally jonah and therefore had spoilers for the whole show, but i’m wondering if making it a fully s2 canon divergent fic would make it a bit easier for me to write.

problem with that is i’ve already planned the whole thing and written 4k. urgh, decisions.

2025-09-23 20:40:15 ¶ ●

i think i’ve realised that i actually just hate my current shorter wip, and that really sucks. it’s an interesting idea (not that unique or anything) but at the moment it just feels so… soulless? but maybe that’s because i’ve already decided that i dislike it??

writing is damn hard. esp when it’s for fun but i don’t feel like i’m having any fun.

maybe i should try writing something else for a bit?? but the well of inspiration is pretty dry atm, and i don’t want to push myself into creative burnout. argh i dunno

2025-09-25 12:55:00 ¶ ●

listening to mag 46 literary heights whilst working and i think i’d forgotten just how interesting the description of ex altiora is, especially when thinking about the vast domains in s5.

my latin composition is pretty bad but oh man what i wouldn’t give to sit down and pen some dactylic hexameter lines about a small village fighting off an ever encroaching god, epic similes and all.

2025-09-28 0:01:09 ¶ ●

just finished mag 56 on my relisten and oh man i remember jon confronting martin about lying to him being later in s2 than it actually is and it hit me way harder a second time around, especially after them going to get lunch together in 53. i think the first time i listened i was preoccupied with the fact that jon could (or would) raise his voice like that, but on a relisten i want to both throw hands and also just give jon a hug. there was a little bit of a lull before this but he’s really not dealing well with the paranoia, is he?

2025-09-28 0:04:02 ¶ ●

also i now have a tma relisten tag if people want to block that for spoiler reasons

2025-09-29 11:41:33 ¶ ●

okay. the past few days have not been kind to me mentally but i am at least sat at my desk this morning. going to look through some supervisor comments (yikes) and then make a big ol’ to do list which will hopefully make me feel a bit more in control.

getting something in the post for my jon cosplay at some point today so trying it on will be my reward regardless of how much i do this morning!

2025-09-29 18:59:53 ¶ ●

sometimes it frustrates me that i spend most of my days doing critical analysis and that means that i am so burnt out by the end of it that i can never bring myself to write anything much of substance on tma. i keep wanting to write something on the use of the theme of belonging when tied with loss of agency but i can’t seem to organise my thoughts properly. this is probably just a result of thesis/writing burnout, but it still sucks nonetheless. shoutout to everyone who puts their time and effort into posts like that, i love you all.

2025-09-29 19:13:15 ¶ ●

anyway i relistened to mag 60 yesterday and i can’t stop thinking about elias interrupting martin’s pretty worried explanation that they all just want to help jon with that fact that elias would really rather not have to fire him. and in such a harsh tone, too. having fun over there all by yourself, jonah?