trans jonah magnus is so real to Me… a lot of his traits could be partially ascribed to his experience as a 19th century trans person
it would create a separation between him and his body, make him a guest in his own flesh, form a “my body is not my own” sentiment that would last for 200+ years (even if for different reasons). it would force him to create himself, and to fight for recognition. it would form the “it’s not in your blood, or your soul, or your destiny” belief (he wouldn’t believe in biological determinism at least, which is a solid argument, i think). it would make him afraid of being outed, and thus afraid of being truly known, and yet make him long for someone who would understand
it’s so insane to me how differently jonah treats jon compared to how he treats everyone else. throughout his life he treated people like tools, like something “to watch, to know, and ultimately to discard”. he doesn’t care about their suffering as long as it benefits Him. but even though he separates himself from other people, puts himself on a higher pedestal, it never seems to apply to jon. with jon it’s always “our master”, “our victory”, “the world that we have made”. everyone else is for us to use. the world is our playground. he’s been living with this “use or be used” mindset for centuries, always on the run, never safe, never trusting anyone, just to meet jon and decide to include him in his life-long plan… and yes, part of this was out of the necessity (he did need to get an archivist for this to work), but if it was purely transactional, then why would he say all that. gayass