choosing to let Barnabas die was definitely a point of no return to Jonah. his letter asks him if he is ready to follow his goals now, if he is ready to leave behind his emotional attachments, his sense of duty, and other obstacles. there really wasn’t any other choice he could’ve made; if he had chosen to save Barnabas, there would be no such person as Jonah Magnus. Jonah, who saves Barnabas, is Jonah, who is not determined enough to follow through with his plans
it does seem like this could’ve been not the first time Barnabas got himself into trouble and went to Jonah for help… and Jonah did look out for him, he warned Barnabas about Mordechai even though he had no reason to try to protect him, but Barnabas still didn’t listen to him. between that and gambling, he seems to enjoy risk-taking behaviours
and maybe previously Jonah would’ve tried to help him anyway. maybe because they had known each other for a long time, because he felt responsible for Barnabas in some way, because he loved him. still loves him, probably, or at least he’s fond of him; why keep his bones after all that time, after he changed locations from Edinburgh to London, even? it could be to just remind himself that can’t turn back now, but it also could be sentimentality. probably both
but that was such a good opportunity to just… not. the only opportunity he will ever get. I wonder when he hesitated. was it when he just noticed the letter? did he make up his mind on the spot, knowing that he has to give up Barnabas now or he will never be able to? or did he try to save him first, went to Mordechai to ask him to release Barnabas? was it Mordechai who asked him how long he would let this continue?
I subscribe to (my mutual’s) vision of jonahbas as roommates in boarding school… Jonah escaped his family to live as a man (🏳⚧) and met Barnabas. in that way, Barnabas would be the first witness of Jonah Magnus, the man, and also the beginning of Jonah Magnus, the king of the ruined world. Jonah sacrificed him to himself