2020-09-06 15:56:24 ¶ ●

## OK SO

I missed one REALLY obvious parallel and so I gotta tell you all about it now.

CADEROUSSE = RODERIGO

For all of you who are like “who’s Roderigo?” And “what does Caderousse have to do with Roderigo?” It’s ok. I’ll tell you the similarities right now.

SO They both have this “friend” who gives them bad advice in a way that sounds like good advice, so they take the advice, which turns out to not end too well for them. And that “friend” ends up stabbing them and they die. But they happen to have a letter in their pocket at the time listing the crimes of this “friend”, which is later found and used against the “friend”. SO YEAH I THINK IT’S A PRETTY GOOD PARALLEL.

ANYWAY HERE’S THE REST OF THE LIST-

Maximilien- Romeo

Valentine- Juliet

Franz- Paris (?)

La Carconte (cad’s wife)- Lady Macbeth

Benedetto- Edmund of Gloucester

Edouard- that one kid from Coriolanus (?)

Fernand- Othello

Danglars- Iago

Albert- Hamlet

Heloise- Goneril/Regan (?)

Edmond- Macduff

Villefort- Macbeth

2020-09-06 19:33:34 ¶ ●

##

Horatio

who? | only know their name | loathe | ugh | overrated | indifferent | dead | alive | just okay | cute | badass | my baby | hot | want to marry | favorite

—————————

OK LET ME TALK ABOUT HORATIO

Horatio is such a good foil to Hamlet. And such a good friend. And also the fact that Horatio is even friends with Hamlet in the first place says *so much* about pre-dead dad Hamlet. Because Horatio’s a very sensible guy. He wouldn’t be friends with just anyone. Which means that pre-dead dad Hamlet would have to have been 1) at least somewhat of a polite and respectful person, because I can’t imagine Horatio being friends with someone who isn’t at least moderately respectful 2) not overly intense, because Horatio seems to be more of an introvert, and (generally speaking) overly intense people would be exhausting to hang out with. Not saying he wouldn’t be friends with *anyone* like that, just saying it would be hard to become super *close* friends with intense people. Both of those two things change post-dead dad Hamlet. But we can be nearly certain that Hamlet was somewhat polite and chill back when he met Horatio.

So yeah I know I’m supposed to be talking about Horatio and I went off on a tangent about Hamlet. Oh well.

Anyway in conclusion I think Horatio’s neat and kinda underrated (not by the fandom, but by High school students as a whole).

Also. Can I just say. I have no idea how he puts up with Hamlet throughout the play. Don’t get me wrong, I love Hamlet. But I love him as a fictional character. If he were a real person and I were Horatio I’d probably tell him to shut up and leave me alone. So yeah congrats to Horatio for somehow tolerating him.

2020-09-06 19:43:49 ¶ ●

##

for the character ask: leeeeeear

who? | only know their name | loathe | ugh | overrated | indifferent | dead | alive | just okay | cute | badass | my baby | hot | want to marry | favorite

OK NOW LET’S TALK ABOUT LEAR

So. He’s an idiot. An absolute idiot. I wouldn’t necessarily say he’s an abusive parent or anything, because that’s more of a headcanon and not directly for the text. But based on his actions in the play alone I’d say he’s an absolute idiot. He literally goes from “oh yes my favorite daughter is Cordelia I love her so much” (and anyway dude why are you choosing favorites?? Now you just gave your other two kids valid reasons to hate you!) to “Oh man I hate Cordelia she’s the worst because she won’t play this game called “Praise me endlessly!””.

I mean I’m no therapist. But I think he maybe should go see one. Is there such a thing as family therapy? If there is the Lear family and the Gloucester family should definitely go.

By the end I sort of felt bad for him because he was finally getting it that he messed up. Maybe if he would have had more time alive he would have realize that he mistreated all 3 of his daughters and not just Cordelia. But nope. He died before he could figure that out.

Also I guess I should take into account that he did the standard Shakespeare character move of “going mad”. Which probably has a medical term nowadays but I’m no doctor so I’m not going to try to diagnose him. Anyway. Regarding said madness. Maybe some of his actions could be excused as just early signs of said madness and not really his acting out of free will? Idk. I’m not a doctor.

So that’s that I guess.

2020-09-08 6:15:28 ¶ ●

One day autocorrect is going to change Fernand to Ferdinand or vice vera, and either the entire tcomc fandom or the entire fandom of The Tempest is going to be yelling at me in the comments

2020-09-08 19:51:40 ¶ ●

Lear: I’m gonna exile the one child that loves and respects me.
Gloucester, to Edmund: wow, that seems pretty stupid
*a few minutes later*
Gloucester: I’m gonna send my guards to find and kill the one child that loves and respects me

2020-09-10 3:47:51 ¶ ●

## This is what the cool kids call a “big oof”

( @sargent-major-jane I deeply apologize for how disappointing this is gonna be- re-writing songs really isn’t one of my strong points)

Ok. So here’s probably the only parody song I put even a drop of effort into-

It’s a parody of Hans of the Southern Isles from the broadway version of Frozen

(And here’s a link to that- please listen to it first if you don’t know it- it’s very short so don’t worry about it taking up too much time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCIuNPArM6Y )

And here’s the re-write version, replacing Hans and Anna with Edmund and Goneril:

“Wait! You don’t have to hide your intentions! Mrs. “oh,.. I love my dad!”… because I’m well aware that you have reasons to be mad….

I’m only the bastard son of an earl

Of a boring city

Full of boring people

Living their lives

So no one remembers my humble face

Or my charm and grace

Of all praise I am deprived

I’ve spend many nights thinking

And finally made a plan

To claim my rightful title

To get revenge, the money and the land!

So please allow me to work beside you

Trust that I will do my best to serve and guide you

I can relate- my father’s crazy and my brother’s gone!

So you see, we are quit the same

So let’s win this game

And together we’ll live on”

And that’s that- enjoy this beautiful train wreck of a song

2020-09-11 4:27:27 ¶ ●

The song Enemy Fire by Bea Miller has such Hamlet vibes.

Like. Listen to it.

There isn’t a single line that I can’t imagine Hamlet saying

Or not directly saying, but referring to something in the play

*cue all of you listening to it to prove me wrong*

2020-09-14 5:01:31 ¶ ●

How invested I am in the main plots of King Lear: 2%

How invested I am in Edmund’s side plot of King Lear: 98%

2020-09-16 2:42:40 ¶ ●

Loving Shakespearean Characters is so annoying because YES I love Horatio NO I don’t know why (what does he even do other than put up with Hamlet’s stupidity?) YES I love Ophelia NO I don’t know why (what does she even do other than NOT put up with Hamlet’s stupidity?) YES I love Laertes NO I don’t know why (he’s cool but he did technically kill Hamlet) Yes it goes without saying I love Hamlet, No I don’t know why

And repeat this process for every single Shakespeare play.

2020-09-23 0:13:25 ¶ ●

## random Hamlet Headcanon because why not:

Hamlet didn’t tell Horatio he’s a prince when they met because he assumed he already knew. Horatio didn’t know and tbh wouldn’t have become friends with him because he’s smart enough to know that becoming friends with a prince = a high probability of getting mixed up in unnecessary drama.

That’s it that’s the headcanon.

2020-09-25 0:39:23 ¶ ●

2020-09-27 5:28:22 ¶ ●

2020-09-27 23:57:53 ¶ ●

Hamlet AU where they’re playing Among Us, and Hamlet Sr. calls Hamlet to tell him Claudius is the imposter

2020-09-29 7:47:36 ¶ ●

On a scale of Hamlet to Gertrude, how good is your relationship with your partner’s brother?

2020-09-29 23:29:18 ¶ ●

## “Dead Dad”- a Hamlet song parody to the tune of Dead Mom

(Ok- so this is barely a parody. It’s basically just the original song but with “mom” changed to “dad”.

Changes will be bolder so you can easily find them.

Original song (Dead Mom from Beetlejuice) linked here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEct4Nod2iU )

Hey dad, dead dad
I need a little help here
I’m prob'ly talking to myself here
But dead dad, I gotta ask
Are you really in the ground?
‘Cause I hear you all around me
Are you here, dead dad?
Dead dad

Dead dad,

I’m tired of trying to iron out my creases

I’m a bunch of broken pieces
It was you who made me whole
Every day they’re staring at me
Like all, “Hurry up, get happy
Move along
Forget about your dad”

'Cause mother’s in denial
Mother doesn’t wanna feel
She wants me to smile
And clap like a performing seal
Was faking for a while
But I might lose my mind for real
You won’t believe the mess that we’ve become

You’re my home
My destination
And I’m your clone
Your strange creation
You held my hand
And life came easy
Now jokes don’t land
And no one sees me
Nothing seems to fit
Father is this it?
Are you receiving?
I want something to believe in or I’ll go mad

They’ll soon ship me to England

or I’ll be here in Denmark

Call when vengeance can be had!
Mother’s moving forward
Mother didn’t lose a dad

Father won’t you send a sign?
I’m running out of hope and time
My two friends spied, My girlfriend died
Hope’s nowhere to be had

No more playing Uncle’s game
I’ll go insane if things don’t change
Whatever it takes ‘til vengeance can be claimed
Dead dad!

2020-09-30 2:49:43 ¶ ●

## a Shakespeare comic no one asked for, yet here it is