2020-11-06 19:40:25 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

## how my english teacher ruined skakespeare and destroyed all happiness from the world: part 1

sargent-major-jane:

> edettethegreat:

> > Ok this is basically just a summary of everything that she got wrong and every time she was annoying.

> > 1-She said that Shakespeare wrote “Henry the 3rd…. and maybe Henry the 2nd too”

> > 2-(this is a really small complaint but) she said “a lot of really good and nice people die in the last act of King Lear”. And. I mean. Would you call anyone other than Cordelia “good” and “nice”? Oh yeah, Edmund, Regan, Goneril, Gloucester, and Lear are all such good and nice people.

> > 3- She said that they called Horatio to check if the ghost is real because Horatio’s an expert on ghosts

> > 4- She forgot that Ophelia exists

> > 5- Said that “O’er” is pronounced the exact same way as “or”

> > 6- She doesn’t know the difference between Brutus and Cassius

> > 7- Is aware that Hamlet is 30. Thinks that his mother is 40.

> > 8- Doesn’t know what year Hamlet (the play that she’s supposed to be teaching us) takes place in.

> > 9- Explained what dew is, with the full assumption that a class of 17-18 yr old people have no idea what it is.

> > 10- Said that Macbeth was strong and Lady Macbeth was weak- her only evidence being that Lady Macbeth died first (@sargent-major-jane I think you’d agree with me on this; ie that if a teacher would say this, you’d also be kinda annoyed) (because like) (you too appreciate Lady Macbeth and understand what a great character she is)

> > 11- She called Iambic pentameter “iambic penariter”

> > 12- She keeps censuring random parts because they’re “inappropriate”

> > That’s all I have so far for the first two weeks of trying to learn Hamlet. More complaints to come.

> I GUESS WE’RE DOING THIS

> 1- Henry 4, 5, 6, and 8, Richard 2 and 3. Ma’am. are you serious. literally any other number.

> 2- fuck Lear he’s a dick. Cordelia, you’re the only bitch here i ever respected jk edmund ily

> 3- Horatio is a college student and disaster gay. all he know is try his best, hold hamlet’s one braincell, and be the best boi.

> 4- i’m sorry, how the literal, actual fuck-

> 5- oher

> 6- that- that doesn’t- they- nO (Cassius is bitch boy, Brutus simps for democracy. know the difference.)

> 7- they weren’t that into child brides

> 8- HOW IS SHE A TEACHER

> 9- dew? that verb that means to actively accomplish something?

> 10- literally, how. no. i need to know. no one disrespects my lady like this. also is she implying that if someone dies before you they are automatically weaker than you? so like. ig the weakest character in Macbeth is Duncan. ig the weakest character in Hamlet is the dead king. ig the weakest character in Julius Caesar is Julius Caesar. the weakest character in R&J is Mercutio. the weakest character in Henry VI part 1 is Henry V, the legendary king who was the hero of the last play, simply because he is the first to die in this one? are you really gonna look me in the eye and tell me there is literally one single dude in the entirety of Henry VI part 1 stronger than Joan of Arc? but oh well she died so anyone who survived is stronger than her ig. no. literally no.

> 11- the the fuck

> 12- news flash lady: ALL OF IT IS INAPPROPRIATE

> anyway fuck edette’s teacher.

Maj you’d be a much better teacher than my current english teacher