2022-05-05 16:11:17 ¶ ●

## Tumblr finally showed me a Blaze sponsored post, and I’m very glad it did

2022-05-08 6:11:31 ¶ ●

Dracula Daily is actually The Best Thing Ever and I love it

2022-05-09 4:06:46 ¶ ●

Watching out the window a group of four girls in their late teens/early 20s, all wearing fancy gowns and heels, walk down the street.

And when I say down the street, I mean down the middle of the actual road. Like where the cars would go. They’re walking right in the center.

Two of them started arguing loudly. One started running after the other and I’m kinda impressed how she was able to do that in heels, but whatever.

I’d be more concerned about her getting violent if the remaining two girls weren’t walking very calmly a few feet behind them and acting like everything’s chill.

Anyway she’s still screaming at the other one.

I’ve never been so curious about a stranger’s argument in my life.

2022-05-09 17:35:35 ¶ ●

There should be an option on Tumblr to see Blaze posts on purpose

2022-05-10 2:22:02 ¶ ●

Get yourself some friends who call you at midnight to read you poems

2022-05-10 15:17:12 ¶ ●

## OK SO I’ve seen a lot of suggestions for what The Tumblr Book Club should read after Dracula, and may I suggest The Count of Monte Cristo, a book that comes with a start date (February 24th)?

It also comes with an end date (October 5th), so. I think it fits tumblr’s criteria.

the whole book’s a meme. Tumblr would find it hilarious.

ALSO It features a Very Himbo Protagonist (for the first three chapters at least). Very similar to Jonathan. They’d get along well.

2022-05-10 15:22:11 ¶ ●

## my tags are so good they deserve to be their own post

Edmond (pre-chateau d’if) 🤝 Jonathan

Being himbo protagonists

2022-05-10 18:00:33 ¶ ●

Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

2022-05-10 18:03:16 ¶ ●

Being in a religious community be like:

Multiple people, this week alone: Why aren’t you married yet?

Me: [is literally 19]

2022-05-10 18:55:37 ¶ ● ⬈

edettethegreat:

> Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

> I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

@guardwasps​ YES EXACTLY

2022-05-10 19:22:55 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

edettethegreat:

> edettethegreat:

> > Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

> > I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

> @guardwasps​ YES EXACTLY

@gattmammon YEAH!! You Get It!!

2022-05-10 19:35:36 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

thesynthesist:

> edettethegreat:

> > edettethegreat:

> > > Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

> > > I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

> > @guardwasps​ YES EXACTLY

> (Guardwasps here!)

> He also just seems to be able to arrange circumstances Just So, he just Decides what should happen and it more or less does. Need an introduction to high society to start your revenge plan? Just get the son of someone who is pretty sure you’re dead kidnapped and then rescue him so he believes himself in your debt.

> Also let’s not forget despite being a self possessed man with a large fortune whose borderline magic he gets super close to fainting a lot and is absolutely EXTRA to the very end

Edmond’s really out here like

“Oh you tried to kill the Crown Prosecutor and rescued his half-dead son? What a coincidence.. how strange that you’d be the guy I hired.. out of all people.. ”

“Oh did you happen to spot the man who killed your father while you were at the opera? That’s so weird 😳 what was he doing there??”

“Oh hello woman I just met, you seem to have a strange interest in poisons.. I can totally teach you about how to make some, if you’d like”

And everyone’s like

“this guy is Creepy but also Attractive but also He Is Pale And Cold but he also gives good advice that will definitely never turn out bad for anyone ever.. so when you weigh the pros and cons, I’d say he’s an overall trustworthy guy!!”

2022-05-10 20:04:51 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

thesynthesist:

> edettethegreat:

> > edettethegreat:

> > > Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

> > > I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

> > @guardwasps​ YES EXACTLY

> (Guardwasps here!)

> He also just seems to be able to arrange circumstances Just So, he just Decides what should happen and it more or less does. Need an introduction to high society to start your revenge plan? Just get the son of someone who is pretty sure you’re dead kidnapped and then rescue him so he believes himself in your debt.

> Also let’s not forget despite being a self possessed man with a large fortune whose borderline magic he gets super close to fainting a lot and is absolutely EXTRA to the very end

@rainstorm48​ So there are 117 chapters in The Count of Monte Cristo- If everyone reads 1 chapter every other day we can start in February and finish in October, which works out great since The Count of Monte Cristo also starts in February and ends in October

2022-05-10 20:50:13 ¶ ● ⬀ ⬈

thesynthesist:

> edettethegreat:

> > thesynthesist:

> > > edettethegreat:

> > > > edettethegreat:

> > > > > Listen Dracula is good but The Count of Monte Cristo is the superior “There’s A Creepy Guy In This Creepy House And He Seems To Have Magical Control Of Everything That’s Going On Here” book

> > > > > I’m positive Edmond could do the work of all his (3) servants by himself without the guests noticing, but Dracula can’t destroy the stock market for the sake of getting revenge on one person

> > > > @guardwasps​ YES EXACTLY

> > > (Guardwasps here!)

> > > He also just seems to be able to arrange circumstances Just So, he just Decides what should happen and it more or less does. Need an introduction to high society to start your revenge plan? Just get the son of someone who is pretty sure you’re dead kidnapped and then rescue him so he believes himself in your debt.

> > > Also let’s not forget despite being a self possessed man with a large fortune whose borderline magic he gets super close to fainting a lot and is absolutely EXTRA to the very end

> > Edmond’s really out here like

> > “Oh you tried to kill the Crown Prosecutor and rescued his half-dead son? What a coincidence.. how strange that you’d be the guy I hired.. out of all people.. ”

> > “Oh did you happen to spot the man who killed your father while you were at the opera? That’s so weird 😳 what was he doing there??”

> > “Oh hello woman I just met, you seem to have a strange interest in poisons.. I can totally teach you about how to make some, if you’d like”

> > And everyone’s like

> > “this guy is Creepy but also Attractive but also He Is Pale And Cold but he also gives good advice that will definitely never turn out bad for anyone ever.. so when you weigh the pros and cons, I’d say he’s an overall trustworthy guy!!”

> *little girl chickens voice* Look at all these coincidences

> Also never once in years of planning this out does Edmond sit down to himself and ask ‘am I being too extra meticulously destroying the lives of anyone who I have decided has wronged me either by choice or circumstances? Is there any way this could spiral out of control and hurt innocents?’
> No he spends all that time perfecting his ability to materialize in opera boxes and be a dramatic bitch

> also lets not forget out of everyone who thought he was attractive FRANZ that poor boy had it so bad.

Franz had the most common sense out of everyone in the book, but then again the bar is really low

Franz was like “hey Albert I think the Count keeps looking at you with the sort of gaze that often signifies malicious intent”

And Albert’s like “Nah! The Count’s cool! He would never!”

And Franz goes “well ok if you say so” and Nopes off to Italy for most of the rest of the book

2022-05-11 18:54:12 ¶ ●

Let’s be real, Tumblr’s ads for pocket knives are definitely their superior ads. All other Tumblr ads completely misunderstand what Tumblr users want. But I’m pretty sure everyone here wants a pocket knife.

2022-05-13 16:17:02 ¶ ●

## Here have a Dracula meme

2022-05-15 15:08:45 ¶ ●

My goal in life’s to have one of my posts reblogged by The Haiku Bot

2022-05-16 16:52:25 ¶ ●

## In today’s episode of Dracula, Dracula gets jealous when his vampire girls seem interested in our friend Jonathan

2022-05-19 16:21:48 ¶ ●

# On May 19th, Jonathan is accepting his fate.

2022-05-24 15:28:17 ¶ ●

High School: How Dare You Submit Late Work 😡.

College: Oh you wanna submit all your assignments in the last week of class? Yeah that’s fine. Good luck with that though.

2022-05-29 18:54:52 ¶ ●

This guy on one of my zoom classes is completely shirtless for some reason, and he’s posing— like he’s laying sideways on his bed with his head propped up on one hand (picture stereotypical ancient Greek dude). so. What’s with this.

2022-05-31 1:47:17 ¶ ●

Only four more days of classes