October 2020

Hamlet roasting people- part 2

Are we all going to ignore the fact that Laertes cannonly has a fan club

OK SO

I was casually on sparknotes because I wanted to see how they translated Edmund’s soliloquy, and-

The original line:

-strongly worded

-bold

-makes him sound like he could definitely succeed with his plot

The new and improved line:

-what

-he sounds like a child

-I’m literally picturing 10 year old Edmund now

part 2 of the great discovery of sparknotes:

Original line:

“oh you’re into that now?”

New and improved line:

“you’re wasting your time with that? Really? You absolute idiot.”

How much I love Banquo: 6/10

How much I love Banquo if his ghost is actually him and not just Macbeth’s hallucination: 11/10

Because. Just the thought of him getting killed and then consciously making the decision to go to his ex-friends dinner party and just. Stand there.

That’s pretty funny.

ya know Edgar and Edmund must have gotten their acting gene from their mothers, because Gloucester can’t act for the life of him. 

the worst take you’ll ever hear from me: Lydia from Beetlejuice is like a modern day version of Hamlet, except not

Ok let’s go through their similarities-

-dead parent

-living parent remarries too quickly

-can see and talk to ghosts

-conversation with ghost/spirit thing leads to very bad decisions being made 

to make up for that last bad take I posted, here’s a slightly better take: Hamlet and Edmund have the same to do list-

Step 1- want revenge

Step 2- start working on your revenge 

Step 3- forge a letter from your relative than might lead to some people getting killed

Step 4- hell yeah! You got your revenge!

Step 5- get killed

As we all know, The Lion King is roughly based off of Hamlet. Let’s match the song titles to random scenes.

Circle of Life- That part at the beginning where Claudius tells Hamlet to chill out because that vast majority of all fathers are dead

I Just Can’t Wait to be King- Claudius pre-play, and Fortinbras post-play

Be Prepared- what Claudius tells Laertes when plotting Hamlet’s death

Hakuna Matata- Everyone telling Hamlet to chill out in Act 1 Scene 2 

Can You Feel the Love Tonight- Polonius trying to convince Claudius and Gertrude that Hamlet’s not mad, he’s just in love with Ophelia 

King Lear, but it’s an Among Us AU where Edmund accuses everyone of being the imposter until Edgar and Albany figure out Edmund’s actually the imposter and vote him out

Hamlet Among Us AU- continuation

(Can I just say. This was saved in drafts for WEEKS and I completely forgot that I never posted it)

The question is.. what color is everyone playing as?

AND HERE IS THE ANSWER-

Black- Hamlet- no explanation needed

White- Hamlet Sr.- ghosts are normally depicted as white so..

Dark Blue- Claudius- See @horationalize’s addition to the AU

Cyan- Polonius- Also see @horationalize’s addition 

Lime- Ophelia- everyone associates her with the plant scene, nature is green

Red- Laertes- he spends most of the play being angry

Brown- Horatio- brown seems like a sensible color, Horatio seems like a sensible guy

Dark green- Rosencrantz- See orange’s reason

Orange- Guildenstern- I feel like this color combo suits them

Pink- Gertrude- seems like her type 

Purple- Fortinbras- it’s a regal color

Yellow- Osric- because there’s no one else left