This is what the cool kids call a “big oof”
( @sargent-major-jane I deeply apologize for how disappointing this is gonna be- re-writing songs really isn’t one of my strong points)
Ok. So here’s probably the only parody song I put even a drop of effort into-
It’s a parody of Hans of the Southern Isles from the broadway version of Frozen
(And here’s a link to that- please listen to it first if you don’t know it- it’s very short so don’t worry about it taking up too much time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCIuNPArM6Y )
And here’s the re-write version, replacing Hans and Anna with Edmund and Goneril:
“Wait! You don’t have to hide your intentions! Mrs. “oh,.. I love my dad!”… because I’m well aware that you have reasons to be mad….
I’m only the bastard son of an earl
Of a boring city
Full of boring people
Living their lives
So no one remembers my humble face
Or my charm and grace
Of all praise I am deprived
I’ve spend many nights thinking
And finally made a plan
To claim my rightful title
To get revenge, the money and the land!
So please allow me to work beside you
Trust that I will do my best to serve and guide you
I can relate- my father’s crazy and my brother’s gone!
So you see, we are quit the same
So let’s win this game
And together we’ll live on”
And that’s that- enjoy this beautiful train wreck of a song