November 2020

how my english teacher ruined skakespeare and destroyed all happiness from the world: part 1

Ok this is basically just a summary of everything that she got wrong and every time she was annoying.

1-She said that Shakespeare wrote “Henry the 3rd…. and maybe Henry the 2nd too”

2-(this is a really small complaint but) she said “a lot of really good and nice people die in the last act of King Lear”. And. I mean. Would you call anyone other than Cordelia “good” and “nice”? Oh yeah, Edmund, Regan, Goneril, Gloucester, and Lear are all such good and nice people.

3- She said that they called Horatio to check if the ghost is real because Horatio’s an expert on ghosts

4- She forgot that Ophelia exists

5- Said that “O’er” is pronounced the exact same way as “or”

6- She doesn’t know the difference between Brutus and Cassius

7- Is aware that Hamlet is 30. Thinks that his mother is 40.

8- Doesn’t know what year Hamlet (the play that she’s supposed to be teaching us) takes place in.

9- Explained what dew is, with the full assumption that a class of 17-18 yr old people have no idea what it is.

10- Said that Macbeth was strong and Lady Macbeth was weak- her only evidence being that Lady Macbeth died first  (@sargent-major-jane I think you’d agree with me on this; ie that if a teacher would say this, you’d also be kinda annoyed) (because like) (you too appreciate Lady Macbeth and understand what a great character she is)

11- She called Iambic pentameter “iambic penariter”

12- She keeps censuring random parts because they’re “inappropriate”

That’s all I have so far for the first two weeks of trying to learn Hamlet. More complaints to come. 

Shakespeare Among Us AUs

MACBETH AMONG US AU

Macbeth and the rest of the cast are trying to play on a private server. So far, only Macbeth and Banquo joined. A hacker by the username 3witches joins. 3witches tells them that she, being a hacker, can control their among us characters and the game, and tells Macbeth that he’ll be imposter, and the other imposter will kill him.

3witches also changed the programming of the game so that the two imposters can’t see who the other imposter is. Macduff is the other imposter.

OTHELLO AMONG US AU

The two imposters are Roderigo and Othello.

Iago is a crewmate who causes chaos for fun.

JULIUS CAESAR AMONG US AU

Brutus and Cassius are the imposters.

Mark Antony decides to watch Cassius closely because Caesar said he was sus. He witnesses Cassius kill Caesar, and sees that Brutus is right there witnessing it too without reporting it. He figures out that they’re imposters, reports the body, gets Cassius voted out, calls an emergency meeting, and gets Brutus voted out.

The whole game lasts less than a minute.

TITUS ANDRONICUS AMONG US AU

By some glitch in the game, everyone’s an imposter. The story plays out exactly as it is.

ROMEO AND JULIET AMONG US AU

Tybalt and Juliet are the imposters.

Juliet doesn’t do imposter things, she just hangs out with Romeo/ guards him from Tybalt. Tybalt tries to kill Romeo but kills Mercutio instead. Romeo reports the body and gets Tybalt voted out.

Later on people start suspecting Juliet of being the other imposter, so Romeo frames himself for it and gets voted out. Juliet immediately calls an emergency meeting and confesses to being the imposter. She gets voted out too.