It’s hard to overstate just how much the audio of “The Magnus Archives is a podcast-” “FUCK, DUDE, YEAH IT SURE IS!” lives in my head rent free. At least once a week I’ll see someone saying “[blank] is [blank]” and the little Alex Newall that lives in my brain at all times will go, “fuck, dude, yeah it sure is!”
The funniest thing to ever happen in the tma universe is when Gertrude was on the lookout for any supernatural clown activity ahead of the Unknowing, so she flew herself and Gerry all the way to New Zealand, and instead of learning anything that would help her avert the apocalypse, she just listened to some guy go, “Yeah, this huge, fucked up pig showed up in my yard one day and I’m like 90% sure he ate a clown? Can you help with that?”
The second funniest thing in the tma universe is that Gertrude’s advice was “encase the evil pig in cement.”
The funniest thing to ever happen in the tma universe is when Gertrude was on the lookout for any supernatural clown activity ahead of the Unknowing, so she flew herself and Gerry all the way to New Zealand, and instead of learning anything that would help her avert the apocalypse, she just listened to some guy go, “Yeah, this huge, fucked up pig showed up in my yard one day and I’m like 90% sure he ate a clown? Can you help with that?”
The second funniest thing in the tma universe is that Gertrude’s advice was “encase the evil pig in cement.”
Like, making jokes about Monster Pig kind of feels like beating a dead horse at this point, but the specific context of Gertrude having travelled so far while in the middle of such important preparations is what really elevates the comedy for me. Girl travelled to a different continent and when she got there the supernatural horror was just a really big pig.
[ID: Lineless digital art of Jon and Martin dancing. Jon is a short thin brown man with his hair in a bun, and Martin is a tall fat man with red hair. They stand with their hands entwined, Jon’s other hand on Martin’s shoulder and Martin’s on Jon’s back. Jon’s eyes are closed as he smiles contentedly, and Martin smiles down at him fondly. The background is mostly white space, and they stand at the far right of it. End ID]
jon in what i’ve worn to go buy milk and eggs this month
[ID: A drawing with two full-body colored digital drawings of Jon from TMA. He is a thin, brown-skinned man with long black hair streaked with gray.
In the first, he wears small white hoop earrings, a dark, ruffly halter top, gray ripped skinny jeans, and black boots. He also wears a loose black, patterned cardigan which has slipped off his shoulders. His hair is in a messy bun and he stands with one hand on his face in a “thinking” pose.
In the secod, he wears a black crop top under a red flannel buttoned at the neck, black sneakers, and black sweatpants. His hair is in a ponytail and he walks to the right, holding one Tesco bag in each hand.
I love that even when Jon is keeping up the skeptic act, he doesn’t even pretend not to believe in Leitners or Jane Prentiss. His stated belief system in Season 1 is that there are precisely two (2) genuine supernatural forces, evil books and evil bugs, and everything else is bullshit.
[ID: 2 digital grayscale drawings of Jon and Martin from The Magnus Archives. Jon is a thin person with dark skin, wavy shoulder-length salt-and-pepper hair, and a short scruffy beard. There are small worm scars on his face and arms and a thin knife scar on his neck. Martin is a fat man with light skin, short curly hair, slight stubble, freckles, and large round glasses.
In the first image, Martin is turned away from the viewer. He is wearing a light knitted sweater and kissing Jon. His right hand is holding Jon’s face, slightly squishing his cheek. Jon is wearing a dark turtleneck and has his right hand lightly curled around Martin’s head. His eyes are closed and his mouth is quirked into a small smile. The background is light pink.
In the second image, Jon is leaning in from the left and kissing Martin on the cheek. His eyes are closed in a small smile, and he is wearing a light, loose t-shirt. Martin is wearing a dark long-sleeve shirt and is leaning into the kiss. His left hand is cupping Jon’s cheek and his right hand is resting on Jon’s back. He is blushing, his eyes are closed, and he has a bashful grin. The background is light yellow. End ID]
Jon’s a sweater stealing bastard, but who can blame him when he’s this cute 😪
Anyways @mini-minish hcs that Jon’s favorite color is peach and always steals martins fav peach sweater
Bonus martins reaction
[ID: TMA fanart of Jon Sims, a brown man with long hair. He’s wearing an oversized pinkish-peach sweater, and he smiles brightly towards the viewer, eyes closed and backlit by soft light. He’s holding a mug with cats on it, and the steam makes heart shapes. The bonus shows Martin, a white man with white streaks in his red hair. He doubles over and clenches his chest, his glasses falling off as he blushes and hearts float around him. End ID]
for like the last week every time i take a doodle break it’s for Mr. Gerald Key…i really love him a lot.
i want to live in the alternate universe where he’s the main character of his own slightly more lighthearted supernatural adventure show?
[ID: A page of sketches of Gerry Keay from The Magnus Archives. He is a pale goth man with long black hair, eye tattoos on his joints, and a long coat with spikes on the shoulders. In the top two drawings, he’s burning books, looking angry and unimpressed. In the bottom left is a drawing of him standing and frowning. In the bottom right, he is sitting slouched over with his boot up on a table, grinning as he looks offscreen. In the last drawing, he is wearing a Hawaiian shirt, with his hair pulled up in a bun. He is resting his head in his hand and looks annoyed as he points to someone offscreen, telling them “Call ur mom”. /end ID]