Another reason I’d love a “S5!Jon travels back to Gertrude’s era, but things are surprisingly fluffy” fic is because can you imagine that combination of problem solving skills?
The avatars when Adelard “Just Encase Them in Concrete” Dekker, Gertrude “I Fucking Love Explosives” Robinson, Elias “Panic Results in [Brutal Pipe Murder]” Bouchard, and Jon “He Might Be an All-Knowing Eldritch Being But I Have a KNIFE” Simms come marching Blockbuster film style out of a dark alleyway:
Also something something the preferred method of murder speaks to the ships. Did I ship Adelard and Getrude before this very moment? No. Do I support them burying/burning together as our chaotic Eye boys grab the nearest lethal object? Yes <3
Things I would love to see in such a fic: 1) Gertrude being badass. Pyromania included. 2) Dekker being the most competent person in a 100 km radius for any and all problems. Concrete is always the answer. 3) Jarchivist meeting a much younger Salesa 4) Jarchivist seeking out Leitner just to say how much his hubris cost him. [This depends on if the fic is set before 1994. ] 5) Elias being utterly fascinated with Jarchivist. Just enthralled. Jonah is so astounded that his plan Worked, that the Eyepocalypse happened and his Archive survived. Fun Beholding times are had as Jarchivist is far more powerful than Elias. Potential jonelias if you want to swing that way 6) Jarchivist and Gertrude having stand offs about who’s The Archivist. Gertrude chose to remain human and couldn’t Behold her way out of a wet paper bag but it’s her job at the moment. And Jon is entirely too inhuman now to simply be Jon, he is the Archivist, has been since he made the choice to awaken from his coma. Certainly Elias calls him Archivist since he can see the truth in that statement, but the other avatars have no way to know that…
That last one got away from me a bit. Sorry.
Reblogging for the EXCELLENT additions.
Also I’m sorry right back atcha because I do want to swing that way and when I read #6 my stupid brain immediately went:
Jon after literal days of arguing with Gertrude about who holds the Archivist title, trying his hardest to - ugh - compromise: “Okay, technically speaking I suppose it’s more accurate to say that I am no longer the Archivist, but the Archive–”
Elias perking up like a many-eyed bloodhound, immediately getting down on one knee: ⁉️👀😍💍
Jon:Ń̷̛̲͚͋̆͆̓̐O̷̻̣̗̱͐͒̚̚͠ͅ!̸̡̆̒!!!
Peter somewhere in the Lonely: “Why do I sense another divorce coming on…?”