why are you as a man wearing a suit? so other men can pull on your tie to bring you in for a kiss? so you can take off your jacket and loosen your tie and unbutton your shirt like a whore? so the process of undressing is an intricate ritual for you and other men to undergo? gayass.
new head canon that while elias was plotting all his machinations for marking jon with every entity he was also sneaking multivitamins into his food because the boy’s still human, at least for the time being, and he hasn’t slept or seen daylight in a worrying amount of time… can’t construct an archive of terror with a severe vitamin k deficiency
anyone in the tags saying this is weirdly cute you are FUCKED past the point of no return, baby. welcome to jonelias let’s fucking rumbllleeeeeee
I often see people depict Elias as the snobby, prim rich boy between Elias and Peter and here’s my argument for the opposite: Peter canonically talks about being an aristocrat and scion of a powerful household, casually mentions dropping unfathomable amounts of money on personal projects, acts like a spoilt child when he doesn’t get his way, spends all his time on his yacht ship chilling in his cabin and having meals delivered to him, insults Jon by calling him ‘grubby Jesus’ which is just so fucking snobby oh my god, has a family that clearly values appearances, and then there’s his ritual. God, his ritual. I mean:
“I still remember seeing the headline, there in black and white: “The Loneliest Building in Britain.” Trouble is, everyone I picked was white middle-class, so people actually cared, falling over themselves to declare it “emblematic of the problems of the modern world.”
He’s such critical levels of snobby rich boy that his ritual failed specifically because he’s so short-sighted about privilege (he also, like an arrogant little rich boy, insisted on picking people himself despite being surrounded by more qualified people, because of course he did).
Elias, meanwhile, is like a 200 years old man who is referred to as a ‘waste of a suit’, loves paperwork, wears the same haircuts for so long that other people notice how old fashioned they are, and is happy to let his vessels reach middle age and older. He’s an old man who likes paperwork and was able to pretend to be a well-meaning, but somewhat incompetent boss for years. Like, this guy isn’t the snobby rich boy between them; he actively uses Peter’s snobby rich boy status to benefit himself.
i am as always in favour of any interpretation of jon that leaves him even a little bit happy about serving the eye. give him a bit of excitement about reading off hazel rutter’s statement and you’ll be my friend forever <3
Fascinating that in a narrative where one character sculpted another, the sculptor himself was, on a meta level, modelled after his creation. They are so similar, by intent.
I saw a post that was like “JonElias toxic abusive dynamics so good” and yeah that’s great and all but I also loovee JonElias healthy fluffy dynamics like two men who finally have someone who can well and truly See them. Elias having gone 200 years without anyone who can see him like Jon can. Jon who was a mentor who sees him for who he is and Encourages it. Like maybe they avoid ending the world all together and spend their time in the library or people watching. Spending hours and hours infodumping on the most random subjects. Playfully delving into each other’s minds until they’re basically one unit. Maybe one day Elias admits to his plans, and Jon already knows doesn’t he. He’s not a fan of it obviously but they’re so intertwined that he understands. But they don’t need to do that anymore do they, after all what’s more powerful than having someone who Knows you?
jon and elias are a cat and dog dynamic but not in the way youd think. yes jon is abrasive and difficult to get along with and yes elias is obsessed with him but jon thinks hes a cat when hes actually a dog (loyal, loving, can be bribed with affection, etc) and elias acts like a dog but is actually a cat (bastard, sarcastic, definitely makes a >:3c face)
how do we think elias knows that dissolved pills leave “such a chalky residue”. the way he phrases it makes it seem like he has personal experience rather than just Knowing
how do we think elias knows that dissolved pills leave “such a chalky residue”. the way he phrases it makes it seem like he has personal experience rather than just Knowing
He’s genderfluid, he’s a transman, he’s transfem, he’s actually cis and gnc, he’s a transwoman but look the exact same as in canon, he’s transmasc and wears feminine clothes, he’s nonbinary
look look i know he’s the resident asshole everyone hates but listen this motherfucker has the sexiest voice i have ever heard in my entire life (goddAMN BEN MEREDITH’S VOICE) you cannot say that his voice isn’t smooth as fuckin butter. the smug asshole. every fanart of him ever portrays him as the cookie cutter tumblr sexyman okay he is THE MAGNUS SEXYMAN. also possessed by a dead guy and served as an avatar of an eldritch horror beyond our comprehension?? sign me the FUCK UP. did i mention he’s voiced by BEN FUCKING MEREDITH? IT’S THE VOICE, MAN, JUST LISTEN TO SASSY BRITISH SON OF A BITCH ELIAS BOUCHARD SPEAK. that’s IT
Gertrude Robinson:
A lady with a mission. Ruthlessness personified. There never has been a problem she couldn’t solve with quick thinking and some C4, until there was. She used to be able to torch a building in half the time.You might have seen her in a dream, she might have seen you too: watch out.
Jonathan Sims/The Archivist:
I just think it’d be funny if an asexual character won
(im ripping this from the wiki btw) John has prematurely greying hair and looks older than he is. He often looks very tired and is physically unfit, as other characters refer to him as scrawny and he tires easily from physical tasks that others perform with little exertion. he also has lots of scars.
(propaganda, spoilers for The Magnus Archives) He’s a wet cat and at one point dated Georgie Barker and does date Martin Blackwood. there is also a whole tag/movement for “hot Jon rights”. he may not be like, 10/10 on the attractive scale but his far off gaze has captivated me
Martin Blackwood:
Canonically fat, usually depicted with glasses and sweaters, always making people tea, dramatic and messy but also vulnerable and full of love
hes SO fucking funny. “i should have thought preventing the horrific transformation of our world wasn’t solely my concern” “im sorry my powers havent yet reached the level of omniscience” “i dont know everything, melanie, do you know how exhausting that would be?” god.
made thanks to an eye exchange au in the JE server! all ya need to know is jon and elias each exchange an eye with each other, for reasons™!
wasnt planned to be, but this is my farewell to this design of Elias. i love my old man immensely, but alas, another is calling my name. ill probably doodle him again when the time comes. until then…
i honestly think my favourite jonelias quote (aside from the classics, like what are you / the archivist) is “fine, ill be more lovely” because it just speaks to such a level of familiarity and comfort between them, during a period of time that we know jon was very unfamiliar and uncomfortable!!
i really need to rest and like i need to rest good and long but i really want to keep writing this because i know i can get it finished and posted tonight
