it may be hypocritical of me to hate jonm.artin fics where martin is controlling or takes over doing things for jon while simultaneously enjoying that content in jonelias fics but,
fundamentally i think theyre treated very differently.
in jonmar.tin fics its since as the morally correct choice. jon is too dumb/self destructive/incapable and martin needs to swoop in and take care of him and take his autonomy away cause jon doesnt know what’s good for him
while in je fic its explicitly a *bad* thing. elias is seen as controlling and evil for doing this to jon
(this is not saying that there arent fics that treat martin as a antagonist for it i just am speaking very generally)
im not sure if jonm.artin fans genuinely think because their ship is ~wholesome~ that this behavior isnt controlling/abusive or if theyre just unaware that this behavior is… bad. it makes me not want to interact with that side of fandom cause theres no self awareness of the more wormy aspects of their content
maybe its because people into jonelias are already into that kind of fiction that theyre more aware when creating that content?
anyway i havent been able to open a jm fic recently where martin doesnt infantilize jon in a gross way to me and its why ive turned away from the ship nearly in its entirety