2020-08-11 19:01:27 ¶ ● ⬈

##

now picturing, for the last scenario, literal floating eyeball beholding somehow drinking wine as it watches jonahlias fall for jon's incredibly awkward seduction attempts

tired-fandom-ndn:

> we are in an endless void

> somehow, set right in the middle of this endless and constantly changing expanse, there is a giant glowing eyeball

> in front of it, floating, is a giant glass of wine

> it has a bendy straw in it

> (the Beholding wanted a fun twisty straw, but didn’t want to deal with the Spiral being all smug about it)

> the eyeball has no mouth, as it is an eyeball

> it is watching its Archivist awkwardly pose against the doorframe of its Watcher’s office

> the Archivist is wearing booty shorts

> this is painful for everyone involved

> oh no, the eyeball thinks, my precious Archivist is an idiot

> every time we look away from the eyeball and look back, the straw is in a slightly different position and there’s a bit less wine in the glass

> we cannot think about the logistics of this without questioning our perceptions of reality

> the eyeball continues to watch as its Watcher responds to the Archivist’s terrible attempts at seduction

> the Watcher is blushing, flattered and delighted at the attention and not at all put off by the horrible awkwardness any normal human would be feeling in this situation

> oh no, the eyeball thinks, my Watcher is an idiot too

> the glass of wine is almost empty

> the eyeball continues to watch its Archivist and its Watcher engage in the worst mating ritual in human history and beyond

> oh no, the eyeball thinks, maybe I’m just terrible at picking avatars