*clangs pots and pans together* TELL ME HOW DOING WHAT THE WEB WANTED THEM TO DO JUST BECAUSE IT SAID IT WOULD RESULT IN ALL THE ENTITIES LEAVING WAS MORALLY JUSTIFIABLE AFTER MULTIPLE SEASONS OF THEM SPOUTING OFF ABOUT HOW DOING WHAT THE EYE WANTED THEM TO DO IN ORDER TO STOP THE RITUALS WAS MORALLY INDEFENSIBLE AND EQUITABLE TO BEING A MONSTER???
We wouldn’t have the discourse over whether Jon was a victim if he had been female. Y’all would lose your fucking brains trying to justify their treatment towards him in season four had they all been female.
The fact is, and no one’s gonna believe me when I say this, but of the three final girls, Melanie is actually my favorite. And even above Jon, I relate to her the most.
There’s a quote from the webcomic A Softer World that goes, “There isn’t a word for the things I will do to the people who wronged me. I have so much rage. Just waiting for someone to wrong me,” that I think sums up what the Slaughter feels like to me.
Rage and anger with nowhere to go is useless. It just leaves you shaking and tired and empty. But when you have a target, when you can point yourself like a weapon at the enemy? It’s cathartic on a level you cannot grasp. And even after, it still feels good and righteous. Because they shouldn’t have been in your way, they shouldn’t have provoked you, it’s their fault.
I think that’s why I’m so defensive of Jon?
Cause I know that need. The need to have a punching bag that screams back, that is the exact reason for your pain and suffering and torment. The thing is though. It’s not about having one around all the time. Getting to the point where you’re going to explode and release it is the point, not letting it out slowly. It has to build and build for maximum impact. Otherwise it’s weak and ineffective. Not even worth the effort.
My baby sister was my Jon. I did awful things to her I can’t even begin to make up for when I was a teenager and justified it because, and tell me if this sounds familiar, ‘she was annoying’. She ‘wouldn’t leave well enough alone’.
She was barely five. She’s my blood. But that didn’t matter. None of that mattered. She was an easy target.
I know it wasn’t her fault, why I did what I did. I know I only had myself to blame for my actions. I know there was no amount of justification that made it okay. I know that, I knew that, and I’ve since done all I can to let go of that unbridled anger and hate.
So that’s why I’m so defensive of Jon and so critical of Melanie. Why, when she said, “I can still hate him, even if I don’t, y’know, blame him[…]”, I gagged. Cause no. You can’t. You don’t get to. When you accept that your anger and hate is only on you, you CANNOT give yourself any leeway. You have to accept the responsibility and consequences of it. Not let it simmer. Not let it build back up and up.
Now you may say, “well she did have reasons. He did [x] to her”. But that’s not the point. Cause her hate and scorn started before they even first interacted with each other, if her first statement is any indication. She already justified her anger when she could direct it towards him. He just helped give her more fuel. And that was on him. Lord knows no one will let him forget that. But what WAS on her, was not letting him get to her. Was letting that anger go so she would actually be in the right when it came down to it. Cause what anger also does is cloud your ability to reason. It makes you make mistakes.
It makes anyone in front of you a target.
I can relate to and understand and empathize with Melanie. But I cannot and will not sympathize with her. She has way too much to learn and I couldn’t stand me when I was at that stage in my mental and emotional health development. It’d be hypocritical of me to not.
Melanie was fighting against the Slaughter, despite the fact she admits she kept the bullet in her leg on purpose. Martin was isolating himself to protect everyone else, despite the fact he admitted he didn’t really care about the others. Georgie was reminded of her trauma when Jon woke up from his coma, despite the fact she literally couldn’t feel any of the effects of fear. Basira believed both Melanie and Daisy didn’t know what they were doing and judge Jon for the exact same things they did, despite being shown and told that it was absolutely no different.
But Jon stalked them because he was afraid they were going to kill him and not because he wanted to clear their name. Jon got marked because he couldn’t let information go undiscovered and not because he was being given hints that he had to stop the Unknowing at all costs. Jon fed on people and kept it a secret because he wanted to keep doing it and not because he was already a monster who should’ve stayed dead and he definitely didn’t release the name of his workplace to whatever her name was so they’d have a reason to confront him when he didn’t end up getting stuck in the coffin. Jon wanted nothing more than to exert his power over the other avatars because he was power hungry and not because his anchor told him he shouldn’t feel bad about it instead of the immediate disgust he felt after obliterating Not!Sasha.
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Blaseball (Video Game), The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist & Jaylen Hotdogfingers Characters: Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Jaylen Hotdogfingers, Martin Blackwood Additional Tags: Spoilers for The Magnus Archives Season 5 Summary:
this is an excuse to get my two current favorite characters to interact with each other. in other words….. if i had a nickel every time i liked a character that had come back wrong because of an indistinct choice via ancient god-like beings after they died in a fiery explosion, I’D HAVE TWO NICKELS, WHICH ISN’T A LOT, BUT IT’S FUCKED UP IT’S HAPPENED TWICE, RIGHT?
Chapters:
7/7
Fandom:
The Magnus Archives (Podcast), Supernatural (TV 2005)
Rating:
Not Rated
Warnings:
Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships:
Martin Blackwood/Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist
Characters:
Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Martin Blackwood, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Bobby Singer
Additional Tags:
Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Post-Episode: s05e22 Swan Song (Supernatural), Post-Episode: e200 Last Words (The Magnus Archives), Location: Somewhere Else (The Magnus Archives), where Somewhere Else is South Dakota, Crossover
Summary:
When Jon and Martin are sent Somewhere!Else, that place turns out to be a junkyard owned by a man named Bobby Singer in a city called Sioux Falls in the North American state of South Dakota. As they nurse back to health in his home, they begin to learn and deal with how their arrival and the arrival of the Fears affected this version of their world. When Dean and Sam Winchester show up and give them more context, they might even begin to heal from their trauma. That is, unless they can’t keep from feeding their patrons.
Figured I should post this here now that it’s done….