I think about how Jonah/Elias lost himself completely to the Eye when he became the Pupil but Jon didn’t bc Jonah hadn’t had the same endless struggle for control over himself that Jon did. And like, over all he relationship to Beholding was completely different from Jon’s since the beginning too.
Everything Jonah did, from attempting the Watchers Crown to starting the Magnus Institute to actually completing a ritual with Jon was to gain personal power and become Immortal. His service to the Eye was for personal gain, and he always seemed to act like he was in control of his powers. And so OBVIOUSLY when he became part of the Eye it took over him completely. He probably didn’t even know how to start fighting it.
Compare that to Jon, who’s whole story is him struggling with the Eye, against the Eye, and because of the Eye. He’s never fully in control and he KNOWS it. Everyone around him knows it too, and they force him to keep himself in some kind of check. Even when the Eye itself gives him a directe statement about how he should listen to it, he shrugs it off and says “You need to do better then that to get me to listen to you.” So when he becomes the Pupil he doesn’t loose himself. He doesn’t even loose awareness. Because for all his faults and mistakes, he never does stop fighting.
It’s not that Jon doesn’t know what he’s feeling or the name of it, it’s that he can’t find a way to articulate them that won’t make people hate him because throughout his entire life he was shown his emotions and needs are a burden and the only people around him emphasize that him being a burden is punishable first by dehumanization and then by death.
“Grief is healthy. If nothing else, it pushes away the other feelings that that thing wants me to experience.”
screaming crying throwing up, Jonathan wallowing in grief and guilt because he thinks it’s what keeps him human. He can’t stop being miserable because it’s the suffering of others that makes him stronger, makes him feel better.
he’s been living with guilt his entire life, he’s been shaped by it, ever since Mr Spider, since someone else died in his place. That’s the whole reason he ended up at the Institute, after all. I don’t think he knows how to exist without it, anymore. He thinks it’s just him, now, and it kills me.
i know jon the archivist sims is a fundamentally good person bc if i was treated the way he was by everyone else on that show i would have doomed the world on purpose
Honestly still not over A Guest For Mister Spider.
So we have Jon. Funky little guy. He’s paranoid and in denial and suspecting his coworkers of murder, but like. In a quirky way. Go little dude go. So the end of season two rolls around, and I’m kinda bummed out about the whole “framed for murder” thing, so I jump right into season three, expecting the plot (and Jon) to go on its merry way. So I, the picture of naïveté, turn on MAG81.
And then Jon goes “The woman who raised me was never able to truly love me because I was a constant reminder that her son was dead, and also never cared to monitor my reading, or what I was doing at all, which led to me being severely traumatised. Also I was bullied by an eighteen-year-old at age eight, and either my grandmother didn’t care, or I never bothered to tell because I knew I couldn’t rely on her. And then that same teenager was eaten by a huge fucking spider, unwillingly saving me from the same fate, and I’ve blamed myself for it ever since. Also I definitely have severe undiagnosed ADHD. Anyway I’m wanted by the police, byeee>3”.
And I’m just. Supposed to listen on. With the knowledge that my Projection Pillow Number One has felt like he shouldn’t be alive since he was eight. What the fuck Jonny. Genuinely. What the fuck.
If I was in Jon’s position I’d be a bitch to Martin season one too.
Dude comes in with more credentials, years of experience, and was picked specifically by my boss who I respect. Then proceeds to show none of the skills he is expected to have and in fact seems to be the least competent of everyone in the Archives.
I would 100% believe he was fucking up on purpose and respond accordingly.
Like maybe it’s the autism and imposter syndrome combo that I embody but Hanlon’s Razor is hard to prescribe in such a circumstance.
Also I prefer Grey’s Law: Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice.
So yeah I’m a firm believer in the ‘Jon was a bitch in season one but you know what fair,’ stance.
I swear to god if I end up reblogging something from another goddamn JonElias shipper I’m going to kill myself. I’m not gonna delete the damn thing cause who actually cares but oh my FUCKING god.
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE SYMPATHIZE WITH JON AND HATE THE OTHER CHARACTERS WITHOUT ALSO BEING FUCKING FREAKS ABOUT HOW HORNY IT MAKES THEM TO IMAGINE AN ABUSER FUCK THEIR VICTIM. PLEASE. JUST ONE PERSON.
Jon, while not technically qualified for archival work, absolutely did have to have SOME experience with things relating to the field. Especially as a researcher with a Master’s in English, which is the most common head-canon for his degree.
I am saying this as someone currently in my first year as an undergrad Library and Information Science major. There’s no possible way he isn’t at least familiar with one or two catalogue systems or any citation styles. It’s the basics, ffs.
Of all of them, the only one I wouldn’t believe to have any knowledge of what the fuck they were doing would be Martin. All of them, to get their jobs in research, would have to have the same credentials. And assuming Miss Sasha ‘lets staple important documents together’ James would have certification to be in the archives, is laughable. I guess they just let fucking ANYONE in artifact storage.
Sorry. Like. On one hand, I know within the podcast, he truly doesn’t have a damn clue, but on the other hand? It’d be insane to me to say he knew nothing. Even slightly. Even tangentially.
What I’m saying is. Let the man know what collection development is and how to budget for weeding and repairing. Please. Let him have had at least one Information Ethics class. I beg of you.
“Jon shouldn’t have talked about Martin and called him incompetent and humiliated him behind his back on official archival material that would be used by other researchers!”
Jon shouldn’t have said ANYTHING about ANYONE on official archival material in the way he did! I don’t work in a library or an archive, but I’ve worked with sensitive material and proprietary information and can safely say he should’ve left out any detail regarding any employee under him or above him AND DEFINITELY LEFT OUT ANY INTRUSIONS INTO HIS RECORDINGS THAT WOULD MENTION SHAREHOLDERS BY NAME.
If you’re going to listen to this podcast, there HAS to be a level of understanding that there’s no attempt to relate it to real life archival methods and real life privacy laws and conventions. So much so, that by the third season, it’s almost a given that the only reason he’s still recording as he does is that it’s a compulsion and literally supernatural in nature. “You missed him too, didn’t you?” “I don’t even turn them on anymore […]” etcetera etcetera.
That’s something Protocol has above it that I absolutely love, and that there’s no conceit that it is supposed to be official documentation. It’s all streamed to us like we’re some voyeuristic third party they have no idea about.
So trying to turn what should’ve been, if they’d thought the premise through, off-the-record idle gossip and work complaints into harassment, is kind of… nonsensical to me. Especially when, as someone who worked a ~normal office job~ for eight years straight, complaining about your coworkers TO your friends and family and even OTHER COWORKERS is actually really normal and doesn’t mean you’re Satan himself.
Point is. Just cause Jon made a comment about Martin being piecemealed apart by Angela, doesn’t mean he actually wanted that to happen. A THOUGHT CAN’T BE EVIL. Y'all can talk about how intent doesn’t matter all you want, but at that point you’ve got to understand all you’re doing is calling out thoughtcrimes.
And no. Just cause Jon sent HIM out there, and just cause he believed that the ones that could only record on tape were real, doesn’t mean he genuinely put Martin in harms way. Especially cause we’re literally told the only way to get the curse turned back to you. And that interacting with Angela neutrally doesn’t automatically put a target on your back. Martin was as safe as anyone else, so long as he didn’t ASK HER FOR A FAVOR and then DIDN’T WAIT FOR IT TO BE FOLLOWED THROUGH. Or did you not pay attention to how the dude that brought the victim to Angela mentioned someone he knew asked her a favor and was fine afterwards?
Sorry. I’ve just had that pent up for a bit. Jon was an asshole, don’t get me wrong, but no more an asshole than anyone else on the planet with a shitty job and shitty co-workers and shitty mental health. It just mattered more cause it had consequences.
I don’t know, I just think it’s a little disingenuous to take ‘eldritch horrors attaching themselves to humans in ways that physiologically affects both their mental and physical states which gives them abilities and a hunger for causing fear’ only as metaphors for things like. Cults and substance abuse and police brutality. I get that they’re used metaphorically in that way, but….. if we’re not supposed to take it at least a little literally — i.e., they would literally starve or at least die or become incoherent if they don’t cause fear enough to kill — then what are we even doing. Why not just write a story about some CEO abusing his employees in order to amass his fortune and cement his legacy while manipulating someone under him into furthering that agenda and doing the same while that employee uncovers the lives that were destroyed both within the company he works for and by the shareholders attached to it. Like. I just don’t see a point in treating it as if there wasn’t at least SOME literalness to the destruction of their literal humanity and self. It just feels like, when Jon literally says ‘Avatars aren’t real’, that he’s LITERALLY saying that Jane Prentiss wasn’t essentially a corpse being piloted by worms or wasp larva. That Jude Perry couldn’t actually make her skin melt like wax. That Simon Fairchild wasn’t ancient. That Jonah Magnus didn’t body hop. Etcetera etcetera etcetera. Do you get what I mean? I just. Get so confused when people say that the “”Avatar’s“” could have made different choices when they first encountered the Fears and it was only because they chose to use the abilities foisted upon them that they lost their humanity. As far as I’m concerned, the moment they had any contact with the Fears, they were already going to be used by the Fears. It was already too late for them. Like. It’s bullshit to me that Melanie says she’s had that anger her whole life. But the minute Jon removes the bullet, she’s no longer affected by the Slaughter. She’s not an Avatar any longer, despite it affecting her for, what, a year? At least as long as Jon had been ~the Archivist~ before it was made apparent that he was beyond the event horizon. And don’t even get me started with Martin using the Lonely to avoid conversations without, apparently, feeding on anyone. Was that it? Was it because they didn’t actually use their abilities on humans? Just against flesh monsters and as a party trick? Cause if so, then it was already too late for Jon when his paranoia about Oliver’s death prediction for Gertrude caused him to ask people giving their statements to come in to the archives to give them. Which, is ironic, considering Oliver also ended up forcing the decision that made Jon fully the Archivist.
Anyway. That’s. That’s all. I’m just. The implications.
Basira and the others aren’t Jon’s ‘impulse control’ or, as I’ve see people say, his ‘link to his humanity’. Telling someone to their faces that you will KILL THEM if they continue with the things they’re doing that hurts others is not holding them accountable. Telling someone that their very existence causes danger to others and that they should avoid other people is not mitigating their worse impulses. That’s not what any of what the others did during season four. Get over it and accept that Jon did what he did because everyone around him saw him as a problem that needed to be beaten into submission. That’s it. That’s all.
This has probably been said somewhere before, god knows I wasn’t here for the peak discourse and discussion days, but sometimes I do find myself thinking about how fandom often oversells Daisy’s meanness to Jon in s4, specifically, in service of the ‘Jon surrounded by mean women’ joke.
This isn’t to say Daisy isn’t mean or that she’s not a mess—she’s both and I wouldn’t have her any other way—but frankly in s4 she really doesn’t get on Jon’s case that much. Sure, she joins in with the intervention about the live statements and she ribs him about moping, but these are not in any way on the scale of how Basira and Melanie interact with Jon on an episode after episode basis.
When she ribs him, it’s rude and blunt, sure, but she’s actively trying to get him out of his own doom spiral because she’s just as concerned as she may be fed up.
And her role in the intervention scene is noticeably smaller and less aggro than the others. When she interjects, she’s not particularly angry—she recognises he’s hunting, puts together the details because she recognises the pattern, then actually speaks up in his defence at one point and only doesn’t push it because it’d be starting an argument about her own problems with Basira that she doesn’t really want to be having in that particular moment in time.
ALTALT
Like, Jon is very much making a point about Basira’s hypocrisy that Daisy then makes a point of agreeing with! But to get further into that matter would mean having to rehash one of her own ongoing arguments with Basira, which would be both a distraction from the matter at hand and the kind of personal business a private person like Daisy would rather avoid dealing with in a group setting.
Her only contribution to the actual discussion after this point is where, after Jon starts suggesting that the Web might be controlling him into taking these statements, she says (unfortunately misattributed to Melanie on the transcript site, it is definitely actually Daisy saying it):
ALT
She tries to discourage him from following this line of thought, from trying to alleviate his guilt by blaming an outside force, because as we see in other conversations this season she’s already accepted her own fault in her own actions rather than fall into blaming something or someone else.
Yeah, she thinks Jon should stop taking live statements, but this is a standard she’s also holding herself to. And she’s not beyond talking behind Jon’s back (see: the planning stages of the Ny-Ålesund trip, or her and Basira running off without warning in Rotten Core). But at no point in s4 does Daisy actually get truly angry and spiteful with Jon or cut him any less slack than she’s cutting herself. And ymmv on said slack, I suppose, given she is expecting herself to die, but sometimes I see posts where it feels like people have decided 'well, the joke is that all the women are mean to Jon in s4, so clearly Daisy was also mean to Jon in s4’ without actually thinking back through her actual behaviour.
She may be blunt and gruff and sometimes fail to think ahead, after all she’s still Daisy Tonner, and Jon understandably still finds her difficult to truly lean on both because of who they both are as people and because of their history, but she actually kind of is in Jon’s corner for most of s4 and I think that gets lost in the fanon shuffle sometimes.
I’ve never seen it being discussed but mag199 is one of the most important episodes in the show and is crucial for understanding Jon’s character and his choices.
Characters here need to make a choice and everyone gives their take on situation. Except for Jon. The first people to talk are everyone present in the room and Jon is the LAST person who says something here.
And when he says that they actually have more options, his words immediately get dismissed by Melanie and Martin. Through the whole conversation the only words Jon gets to say are some unnecessary corrections and weak protests. But he never gets to say his piece fully.
Again, the person who’s the only one able to change world back, is the last one who gets a word to say.
From Jon’s POV, here he is, again, viewed only as a tool. Here he is, again, not the one to actually decide what to do with the world. He is, again, forced to do something he doesn’t want and his own will does not matter.
And this is crucial for his actions in mag200. He never wanted the option everyone else agreed on, and still he is expected to follow the path that was carved out for him. He never chose to be marked by the Web, he never chose to end the world. And he didn’t want to let the fears free. This choice was made for him.
But still, for the first time HE is the one holding all the cards now and finally, FINALLY be the only one to decide how to play them.
Can’t get the image of Jon back-handing Jonah in the mouth out of my head. The satisfying sound it would make. The shock on both their faces. Then Jon lunging at him to gouge the bastards eyes out.
oh my GOD i have so many thoughts. “that’ll be our Gerard” drives me insane. what do you MEAN. why did you have to say it like that. he nearly killed this man what do you mean OUR GERARD. jon was in love with that man long before he met him. lord.
and “i always wanted me friends to call me gerry.” like… fuck?? like. its heavily implied gerry’s literally never had a friend. jon hasn’t had many friends either. if gerry hadnt. yknow. died a year before the series started they would have been soooooo insane. drives me bonkers.
“do you like it?” insane. i n s a n e. and then “i suppose i do”???? you just met this guy and youre telling him that? youre already comfortable enough to admit one of your darkest secrets. and the. the lack of judgement. gerry’s in this too, in a way no one else in jons life really is.
god. if gerry qasnt. dead. they interacted for like 20 minutes and they have SUCH a good dynamic, like, i need to fucking dissect their episode, my god. fuuuck. if gerry had been alive. i think things would have worked out better im all im saying. i think maybe they couldve fixed each other.
i mean probably not. but i think they should make out just in case. just to check
Hey why the FUCK are there ten goddamn minutes of ads on The Magnus Archives on Spotify when I have fucking premium. Why do I have to skip through five solid minutes of ads before and after every episode. Why is that a thing. I thought I stopped listening cause the show itself make me full of rage but no. It’s this.
Ok, so I finally finished putting the incident dates on here, I would like to thank @life-in-present-tense for getting all the dates, it was incredibly helpful, and saved me so much time.
(This took me way, way longer to finish than it should have. I actually put all the dates in a while ago, but to make the sheet in chronological order I had to move each row manually and I ended up getting busy and not having the energy or motivation to finish it so I’m sorry about that.)
To recap, here’s all the information on the sheet:
Episode Number
Episode Length (for multiple statements in one episode the statement length is in parentheses. [ I’m not quite finished with them yet])
Episode Name
Read by / Taken by
Case File Number
Statement Giver
(Date of) Statement Given
Regarding… (summary)
(Date when it was) Committed to tape
(List of) Speaking Characters
Incident Date
Along with the information, there are multiple sheets:
Episode Order
Alphabetical Order
Alphabetical Order without (most) “The"s and "A"s
Chronological Order by Statement Given Date
Chronological Order by Incident Date (For ones that have no date, I placed it based off of when the statement was given, so the incident was some point before then.)
Statement Filters (Read by / Taken by - Jonathan Sims, Elias Bouchard, Gertrude Robinson, Basira Hussain, Martin Blackwood, Melanie King, Timothy Stoker, and Live Statements)
Speaking Characters Filters (Literally every character that spoke in more than one (1) episode, and One Time Characters)
For the filter sheets I’m not sure how well it works on mobile, but it definitely works on a laptop.
(EDIT: The Statement filter page is not completely working, Episode 200 is on every filter, I will try to fix that later)
I can’t stop thinking about this scene. I can’t stop thinking about how this is legitimately just Martin pointing out that if Jon had just stayed dead or killed himself that the archival crew would’ve been free and safe and therefore the world would’ve been free and safe cause he wouldn’t have been able to be used to enact the ritual. I can’t stop thinking about how this is legitimately just Martin asking Jon if he would’ve stayed dead or killed himself had he known about the fact of the matter and in questioning him doubted his commitment to DYING for the greater good.
Martin flat out told Jon to his face that the world would’ve been better off without him and Jon didn’t disagree. And then Martin has the gall to be shocked when Jon decides to kill everyone and everything just for the notion that no one would be in the situation he had been in that resulted in the rituals success.
Bringing this back while a certain someone talks about it.
real tbh like he did NOT need to be hitting jon. i get it was like a tense environment but i really feel like they glossed over that so much??? like he could’ve just shook him or smth to like spook him out of his statement trance thing
can we talk about this scene for a moment because like… ?? it’s so glossed over but martin genuinely just slapped him without really any hesitation or consideration of any other option here whatsoever - of which i believe there are many - and then literally just does not sound apologetic at all even when he’s apologising.
and then it isn’t mentioned again.
like guys i appreciate we’re in the apocalypse here, but am i genuinely meant to believe this is a relationship i should be in full support of? i just… don’t see why this was written in as a presumably positive portrayal of martin’s character.
and i get that it could be a genuinely important scene with some writing around how these high stakes or whatever cause people to become impulsive and unintentionally hurt people they love, but in that case, like… why isn’t it?
It’s just moved on from and they have some conversation about The Web with martin again getting annoyed at Jon for forces outside of his control and just not really caring about him in any way that makes the audience really see why they’d want these two to be together.
I may be biased in that point as i did, admittedly, skip the safehouse episode, which seems to be like the one where presumably they like gave all the fans a reason to root for them, so if I’m missing anything crucial from that episode then please tell me because I’m not sure I can bring myself to listen to it tbh.
Hi do you have an ao3 account or just fic recs In general? I’ve been looking through your account and I feel like you read a lot of good ones.
Hey! Yeah! My AO3 is HERE! You can read the few I have myself or there’s my bookmarks!
I appreciate the confidence in my tastes. My apologies if it’s not exactly what you’re looking for. If ya want I can narrow the ones I have there into my top five?
Set after MAG 147 Weaver, it’s just a small scene I imagined of Jon telling Basira about it. Put under a read more cause I’ve decided to post the whole thing. It technically was finished so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Despite her reservations, Basira decided to let Jon have a moment to himself.
There was a slim chance of him having much extended alone time from this point on, all things considered, so she figured it wouldn’t hurt to leave him to it for the rest of the day at least. Not that she didn’t make sure to keep track of the door to the archival department and his office. Still. She tried.
Up until she realized that he still hadn’t left his office by nightfall.
She didn’t bother knocking, just pressed her ear to the door to hear if he was still recording. When she didn’t hear his usual cadence, she simply opened the door and stepped through.
Her first thought upon not seeing him was, ‘how did he get out? There’s no windows.’ Her second thought upon hearing him cry out and then a bang that was preceded by another, more painful, cry was, ‘he really needs to get a hold of himself.’
“Nice nap?” she asked as he appeared from under his desk, rubbing where he’d obviously hit his head, her tone neutral. The mirth at his embarrassment cancelled out the irritation at him not reporting back about Annabelle’s statement.
He rubbed at his eyes in a way that just drew attention to the fact he no longer wore glasses and stifled a yawn. “S-sorry. Didn’t. Didn’t mean to fall asleep. Annabelle. It didn’t… her statement didn’t sit well with me. Just needed to take a breather. Meant to tell you before-”
“I’m fairly certain your stomach troubles or brain pains are a bit less important than letting us know if Annabelle is someone we need to worry about,” Basira said. She tried to put some levity to the tone but the apprehension she felt made it fall flat. And fall it did.
“Yes, I get it, Basira, I’m a monster,” Jon said with an anger she hadn’t seen in him. It wasn’t out of not knowing something, it wasn’t out of fear of a situation out of control. “I died and some creature took my place. I. Get. It.” He didn’t look at her as he seethed, didn’t look at her as his anger dissolved and he dropped to his desk chair. “Sorry. I’m sorry. That wasn’t… um.” He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his desk and massaged his temples. “It. It wasn’t anything I guess I didn’t already know. She’s keeping an eye on the institute, for whatever reason, and warned me not to go back to Hill Top Road. And a LOT of musing on free will. But that’s not-” he cut himself off, shaking his head. “I know you don’t trust me, but I swear that’s it. Satisfactory?”
Finally, he looked at her and she looked back. It was a staring contest neither won.
“Not particularly,” Basira said and Jon made a sound almost like a return to his burst of anger. “It’s not great that she has… I guess, a presence here? One fear entity watching our every move is one to many.” He furrowed his brow at that but it smooths out quickly enough. “But I’m not gonna take her threat lightly, so… leave it alone?”
Jon sighed and it was long suffering. “Yes, I suppose so.”
Basira hummed to herself and simply watched as he mindlessly tidied his desk. It was almost a lost cause for all the piles of statements he had on it, but clearly, he had his own method to the madness… and probably half the department’s mugs. Jon didn’t motion to move them, though, just picked up every pen he had strewn across his desk and stuffed them in a drawer.
For a moment she wanted to see if she could get him to actually show an emotion again. To know exactly where his limit lied now that he wasn’t foggy and upset. And he still hadn’t asked her to leave, either, so she knew that there was a likely chance she could still ask him some questions. Or at the very least was aware of his soon to be diminished personal space. But she said nothing.
Hey! Yeah! My AO3 is HERE! You can read the few I have myself or there’s my bookmarks!
I appreciate the confidence in my tastes. My apologies if it’s not exactly what you’re looking for. If ya want I can narrow the ones I have there into my top five?
Okay, so, decided to go ahead and make a reclist. Couldn’t really narrow it down to just five, so here’s eight of them. In sort of an order of faves and similar themes.
I used to read this one basically every night when the last act of season five was airing. Brang me much comfort. Essentially, just Jon fucking losing it on everyone and them actually having an ounce of sympathy for him. Highly out of character (they would murder him and not even feel anything about it) but still. Kept me from going insane during it all.
Let me count the ways I love this fic. It has time/dimension travel as the premise is an alternate end-of-the-apocolypse Jon travels using Hill Top Road to when he was comatose/dead, it has frank discussions of issues the series refused to have when it comes to their treatment of Jon, it even has statement speech where Jon can only speak using quotes from statements. Unfinished, although the author says she will. Please read.
Ever wanna read a fic where Jon brings up all the issues he and Martin has as well as his suicidal thoughts? And also where they get dangerously close to breaking up? Well. Here ya go. Set elsewhere, its an examination on how they cope with. Well. Everything. Lots of discomfort here with a ‘happy’ ending, and I wish they had actually broken up, but what can you do :/
Similar to the prior fic, a deep examination on all the issues Jon and Martin have or will have if they survived to elsewhere. Heavy on the suicidal thoughts here, though, as Jon is actively self harming in so many words. Doesn’t much include a discussion of breaking up like the prior does, but it doesn’t ignore that their relationship is not the best and they do talk about it.
Jon dies! Sort of! Premise is a version where Jon goes along with the plan and hasn’t seen It’s A Wonderful Life so a phantom Gerry takes place of Clarence when Jon is about to jump off a bridge to shows him, and the others, that even if Jon hadn’t been around to 'cause the end of the word’, everything would still be FUCKED. Very cathartic, much emotional release, surprise in the epilogue.
Jon dies! For real this time! Completes suicide mid season three and the aftermath of what that brings. Spoiler alert, Basira takes his place as the Archivist. There’s a lot of character bashing of Basira and Martin being the vocal point of that, which doesn’t make sense to me, but as long as she gets hers I don’t give a fuck, lol. How’s it feel to be hungry? How’s it feel to be a monster? How’s that poetic justice? Pretty good it doesn’t seem. Eat shit and die, Basira.
Most recent fic I’ve read and one of the few 'Jon goes through with quitting’ fics I have here. Not a lot of spite and anger, and it does have some moments of the others being uncharacteristically reasonable. Still. Fairly cathartic. Need to reread it, but I wouldn’t have bookmarked it if it wasn’t good, lol.
Epistolary, outsider perspective fic in a sense. Jon, under an anonymous pseudonym, sends questions throughout the seasons to a website seeking help. An injection of sanity into the insanity of the series, as it lays out the facts and talks them through from both sides of things. Sympathetic to Jon without coddling, understanding of the others without excusing them.
If you look through my bookmarks later, you’ll see a lot of fics I should get rid of tbh. Had a weird hanahaki disease phase. A lot of JMart in general. The big Supernatural Crossover I wrote also includes JMart in it as being, like, able to be healthy, but that’s cause it wasn’t about that, lol. So. Anyway. Hope this helps :)
Thinking about this interaction between Georgie and Jon from the episode ‘Infectious Doubts’… cause what the fuck is this???
“I came in here thinking you were Melanie,” versus “I could hear you talking about The Horrors, freak.”
Takes me the fuck out. Make the inconsistency make sense, fuckers, I dare you. Like. Seriously. Was she chill thinking Melanie was just sitting there listening back to the tapes? Cause I feel like she’d know the difference in a playback to someone speaking out loud. And with that being the case why did Jon being there shock her? This entire exchange is fucking with me. Feels like I’m on acid. Like I’m seeing things no one else is.
Thinking about this interaction between Georgie and Jon from the episode ‘Infectious Doubts’… cause what the fuck is this???
“I came in here thinking you were Melanie,” versus “I could hear you talking about The Horrors, freak.”
Takes me the fuck out. Make the inconsistency make sense, fuckers, I dare you. Like. Seriously. Was she chill thinking Melanie was just sitting there listening back to the tapes? Cause I feel like she’d know the difference in a playback to someone speaking out loud. And with that being the case why did Jon being there shock her? This entire exchange is fucking with me. Feels like I’m on acid. Like I’m seeing things no one else is.
Can I share my opinion?
I think it makes sense and this whole thing was pretty much in Georgie’s character.
I think after abandoning Jon at the hospital and telling him, basically, “Screw you, I don’t want to do anything with you and I’d rather you died, but essentially idgf”, she came back to check on him, out of guilt or curiousity or residual desire to help - I don’t know, but it certainly backfired. I think she also stood there behind the door for some time, listening, knowing perfectly well that it was Jon’s office and Melanie was in another part of the building. But she covered it with a pretense “I was searching for Melanie” because she’d thrown Jon out of her life and it would be weird if she came to check on him, and I think she knew that. She also didn’t WANT him back in her life.
So, she came back to see Jon only to tell him “Screw you, I don’t want to do anything with you, idgaf” AGAIN, the second time, and frankly, to me it seems like mockery, like she was intentionally rubbing his face in the fact that he was alone. I don’t think she intended to mock him and rub it in his face, I think there was a part of her that felt guilt over how she left him and wished to know how he was going and it was her initial intent, but it certainly did came as mockery. She did go into his office intentionally, she made it seem like she cared, only for her to tell him “No.” And not only this, but Georgie also quite deliberately went to Martin and told him “Hey, you should abandon Jon too.” And I think when she went to Martin she also lied and pretended that she was just waiting around for Melanie?
She had no right to do any of those things. She had no right to come see Jon and ask him how things were going after she made it clear she didn’t want him in her life, she had no right to tell him she didn’t want him in her life AGAIN, after SHE decided to come see him, and above all else, she had no right to contact Martin and tell him how Jon is all bad, beyond help, everything is his fault and Martin should abandon Jon too because Jon “would only drag him down”.
Hey. Anyone is welcomed to share an opinion. I’m not some monarch you need to ask permission to speak to.
Now. Okay. So. I’m going to be completely honest. The whole time I was picturing this scene to be like. A situation where a writer walks away from their work for a while and forgets what they wrote, continuing and getting too far to see the inconsistencies. Cause when you listen to it, unless Georgie is a REALLY good actor, she does sound like she was surprised to hear him. And she wasn’t lying about meeting with Melanie. That time with Martin? Melanie shows up right after. So, whatever else? She didn’t lie about that.
So. Essentially. I was looking at it not really questioning the content? I was looking at it and questioning that she said two things that directly contradict each other.
I didn’t think that the contradiction was the point.
Cause yeah. You’re right about it all. She absolutely was checking in on him despite telling him to his face she never wanted to see him again. She absolutely was checking in to continue judging and berating him. She absolutely was checking in and stumbled into a situation where she could ‘warn’ someone about him. She was absolutely doing all that with zero self awareness or reflection.
We can see what she was doing. We can see the truth behind her actions. No matter how much she believed she wasn’t doing harm and that she was acting in her AND HIS best interests, a different story is being told.
There’s a point where a narrative doesn’t match the text and it’s being told that Georgie was making her own decisions based on a genuine desire to help and out of ignorance of the situation, that she realizes this at the eleventh hour and takes responsibility for it, and there being zero evidence to back any of it up. And I’m sick of being told otherwise.
I didn’t want Georgie to supplicate herself. I didn’t want Georgie to help Jon. I didn’t want ANY of them to help Jon. Their ‘help’ was the problem. I wanted her to go away and stay away. At least then she would’ve actually been telling the goddamn truth.
These kinds of interpretation absolutely baffle me. Why do we, as a fandom, see an abused, hurting, struggling, vulnerable man, who clings to his humanity and tries to protect everyone around him in a world that doesn’t make sense and is trying to actively KILL him, and immediately jump to a conclusion this man is… weak and pathetic?
Why? Because he was abused?
Because his bodily and psychological autonomy were violated in every sense, and he could do nothing to stop it?
Because he got addicted and dependent on something he didn’t choose or want, had no control over, and had no choice?
Because he got addicted to statements and trauma and the Eye against his will and was actively starving himself? Because starving himself made him physically weak, tired and prone to collapsing?
Because his health was failing?
Because he was hurting every minute of his life?
Because he tried his best to resist the powers and it made his pain WORSE?
Because, despite his fear of vulnerability, his highly independent nature and exterior aloofness, he was deep down a deeply vulnerable, hurt man?
Because he’s a victim of abuse, and he couldn’t do anything against his abuser?
Why, can you explain to me, WHY do you call Jonathan Sims pathetic? Do you really think people who are victims of abuse and violation, people who are suicidal and depressed, people who are chronically ill, people who struggle with physical and mental health problems are?
Some sketches of an extremely self indulgent post-series AU. Just… Jon being a single ‘dad’ and working as a barista can be something so personal, y’know?
Did more sketches. Still don’t have an actual plot yet though. Maybe someday ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
M…m…more…
What’s this???? It’s… LEVAA WITH THE SINGLE!DAD BARISTA JON TMA AU!!!!
And now comes in the beloatheds. Except Martin. Currently he’s ‘Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Fanfic’. He’ll probably be on the next batch. Idk.
Enter Martin. Planning on finally making the master post for this later.
Did some sketches of a version where Daisy ‘survived’.
Because this is my self-indulgent AU and if I want this type of fluff I will draw it.
On the end of season 2 in my relisten (distinct from my reading of seasons 4&5) and tell me why, during my first listen, I thought the opening scene was like. Implying they thought he was going to kill himself.
Nah. They fully thought he was going to kill someone. Wild. I wonder why I thought Jon’s little apologies were essentially a suicide note where they didn’t. Hmm.
[TMA finale spoilers] Because i enjoy being miserable, imagine if melanie, georgie, and basira were still fucked over after the world returns due to their ties to the archives. The entire world fell victim to magnus’ plans. Even if it took a while to make the connection that the Institute was the source, I’d be surprised if it wasn’t eventually tied together by the governments of, again, the entire world, in a desire to figure out what happened and why and to avoid it happening again.
I can easily imagine ex-avatars ratting each other out and giving out whatever information keeps their heads on their shoulders, including calling out the Institute. And then it’s just a matter of finding who was employed and which of those people were involved… Obviously an incredibly unlikely scenario if everything is reduced to rubble (including any paper trails), but like…those three could absolutely be left in a world wanting someone to pay, and them being the closest living thing to that desire, and even if they’re safe due to destroyed evidence, they could be living out the rest of the unapocalypse in anxiety
mag 24, 90 and 104 . jesus christ is that why Tim went to Malaysia? Jon didnt even know specifically where she lived but Tim tracked her down??? oh my gd
DAISY Don’t you… Don’t you dare look at me like I’m crazy! It got you too, or do you think we gave him those tapes because we like handing out evidence?
ARCHIVIST What?
BASIRA That’s not how it happened.
DAISY No? You ask me to take a tape over to this murdering freak, and I’m all set to tear you a new one for it. But then I get the cassette in my hand, and suddenly all I want to do is deliver his tapes, and spill my guts.
I love how all of this is couched in tenses that imply Georgie’s on the fence about whether or not she’s actually apologetic or blames Jon. Hedging her bets. Which. Fine. That’s how you have to be without fear. I can accept that. I can accept Melanie’s backhanded compliment as well. Hell. It even includes Jon briefly defending himself! When stacked with everything before it, this is an okay scene.
Nothing is resolved though.
None of this conversation matters, in the end, because they’re right back at where they started.
Jon fully denies that there’s anything she should apologize for, so Georgie continues to downplay her part in the situation despite her supposed acceptance of the responsibility given to her by the role forced on her. Georgie doesn’t fully commit to either remorse or blame, so Jon ‘betrays’ them when no one listens by going against the majority vote as he had no belief that any choice he made would make anything better at all.
And I’m not saying stagnation is bad if that’s the point. If this was to show that they’re not moving forward because they’re not out of the situation then that’d be one thing. Or maybe that’s what future conversations were supposed to show. In either case, this was clearly written to show they’re making amends. But it doesn’t. They’re not.
Me: I understand that the point of a story is not always to make the audience feel good, but to make an audience think. When we are presented with a cast of morally complex characters it is the writer’s responsibility to make those characters full and rich, and the audience’s responsibility to identify that fullness, and to question the instinct to villainize or justify any given character at any given time. In a world built on fear, largely following the perspective of one man who is just as flawed as all the people around him, it is more realistic and in some ways more interesting to embrace the emotional conflict that will come when these people all inflict trauma upon each other. They all hurt each other so deeply, because they’re all stuck in the same pressure cooker with literally no escape and no outlet and no information. The tragedy of it is the fact that there was never going to be a chance for them to work together because by the time they learn of that necessity the bridges have already been burned. Sure, they could have stopped it all from happening if they had done it differently. But could they really have done it differently? In their heart of hearts, with the context they had, could they really? And that’s what the narrative wants to make you think about.
Also me: But what if like… What if they were friends… What if things were just nice sometimes… As a treat…
Demons and monsters that torture people because they feed on human suffering are so dumb. People are suffering everywhere my guy go literally any place and take a deep whiff.
Monster that feeds on suffering becomes a professional caretaker for people with chronic pain and terminal illnesses. They can’t change the fact that these people are suffering, but they help a bit and in the meantime they’re fat and happy off that Sweet Sweet ambient pain in the air.
Two towns over there’s a demon lord trying to get their cult to abduct people for torture, but they keep getting stopped by heroes and the like, so they’re barely scraping by. Meanwhile Belogarth the Registered PCA is chowing down on back pain, medication side effects and looming mortality for eight hours a day and has become the most powerful demon on earth without realizing it.
“But don’t their clients feel weird knowing that they’re feeding off their suffering?” No they think it’s hilarious and they’re real shits about it.
Finally a medical professional who believes that they are in pain. Because the fucker is actively chowing down on your agony. Not only am I going to get treated by them I’m going to invite all of my chronically ill friends to come as well.
Turns out if you treat the pain then the humans will bring you more humans who are suffering. It’s like a restaurant where the waiter is so impressed by your ability to eat food they’re giving you more on the house
They say things like “well, it’s a real feast day for Belogarth today!” and “if my meds are held up at customs again I’m gonna put Belogarth in a food coma” and Belogarth is the one feeling weird about it
No. I’m pretty sure you’re only supposed to read that “don’t touch me” scene as Jon being a monster. I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to think back to all the other times he was stabbed and hurt and violated to view it as a reasonable response. I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to take the through line of ‘you chose this’ to its logical conclusion that Jon enjoyed every act of violence against him and therefore wanted to have the power he had so he could exert it over people he deemed unworthy. Pretty sure there’s not supposed to be an ounce of sympathy given to someone with that much power. That you’re supposed to view Jon — sorry, the Archivist — as the true villain that joyfully and without restraint caused global suffering and torture. In fact, I think if you think otherwise that Jonny and Alexander will look down their noses at you and shake their heads in disgust.
so a couple days ago for a mag a day was checking out, otherwise known as the episode that equated trauma based touch aversion to being a monster who thinks they’re better than everyone else :)
i will never be okay with the fact that this episode looked at how jon was legitimately tortured fourteen times over mentally and physically and instead of realizing that MAYBE trauma on that level and scale causes people to not want to be touched by anyone, let alone people who are currently not safe themselves, it said he was too self centered and self focused to see the fact that this person was scared and also in pain.
anyway, why am i still even thinking about ‘victim-blaming’ the podcast. i really should just. stop.
They announced when The Magnus Protocol was coming back which reminded me of the fact the teaser description of the next episode implies something about Sam being in a different dimension which could be the The Magnus Archives dimension and the thought of him bringing the fears back into that world after everything that happened almost made me pass out from the sheer schadenfreude it made me feel.
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