I genuinely think that the reason people want to say that Jon deserved to be hated and that he caused everything that happened to him is because they’re over compensating for every other piece of media with a male main character by turning any criticism towards the female main characters into misogyny and infantilization instead of, y’know, that some people relate more to Jon due to their own issues with dehumanization and that their ‘shallow’ read of the plot and themes is due to that.