Blrghhh. Two more. Contaminant and *checks notes*….. Dead Woman Walking….. *sigh* …..let’s just get this over with…..

MAG 93

This is the one with the dead mom and daughter and purple mold in the bathroom. I think I thought it was kind of a tame episode and also like….. mold is serious. Do you want to fuck up your immune system and brain? Cause that’s what will happen if you don’t kill the source of a mold outbreak.

So Lester says it was a hereditary disease but… I’m curious… which one? What hereditary disease would let one live a longer time than the other? Potentially twice as long? I don’t know anything about it but I assume there are some. I just don’t know which ones.

Anyway, gin is sometimes used as a disinfectant.

So thinking about the Corruption and how its both sickness and toxic relationships, I’m thinking about how the mold is used here. Thinking about how it could metaphorically be connected to the hereditary disease, something something unseen until too late and difficult to get rid of.

Cancer is hereditary. The description of tendrils remind me of how cancer is described when its consuming the organs its attached to.

The way Breekon and Hope are couriers for multiple factions of the Fears is something that I feel is just a way to sew the seeds of the idea of the ‘fear soup theory’.

…

I still don’t get why she’s so adamant about him not recording them specifically in her flat. If she thinks that recording the statements and the statements themselves are dangerous, then she should demand he not record AT ALL. ESPECIALLY if she’s genuinely concerned about him! And if we’re going with the ‘statements = drugs’ allusion, then you’d think she’d want him doing it in a safe space where she can keep an eye on him. But no. Go do it on the street. I don’t want to see or hear it. That’s what I get from this. Go girl give us a boundary that actively makes things more dangerous for him while saying you’re worried for him. Whatever.

No?? Then what would make you happy, Georgie. Aside from being able to criticize every last thing Jon does.

We get it. You understand that you as a writer have no idea what constitutes as archival work and used that as a plot point because you didn’t want to do basic goddamn research and also wanted another sign that Jon was an egocentric asshole who thought he was better than everyone else. WE. GET. IT.

Sometimes it feels like this is only considered when it comes to the Grand Ritual. Like. Hey. Let’s ignore that it causes Jon psychological distress because he’s literally feeling their feelings! Ignore that. It’s for something later on. Don’t want to imply he has empathy or sympathy for anyone cause otherwise you’d think he was human! lol! Can’t have that!!!

Fuck. Sorry. I’m being really bitchy. Georgie just does that to me. Can’t be helped.

Anyway. Georgie’s ‘something she’d never choose to tell him’ being about his accent made me feel vindicated cause it was ridiculous but at this point he’s gone to his natural register. At least around her. He still does the deepened, put upon voice at times. Which. Why have Jon be the type to put on a facade to appear more… professional? In control? Whatever. Why have him mask as that if we’re still supposed to see him AS THAT FACADE.

Whatever. I’m. I’m tired.

I’ve already bitched about how it was Georgie that coined the term Avatar so I’m just going to highlight and point big red arrows at it and leave it at that. But. That last part. Is interesting to me. Because I was under the impression that being an ✨Avatar✨ didn’t actually change the person! Not really! But what do I know. Avatars aren’t reaaaalllll.

Just gonna note that despite EVERYTHING SHE SAYS ABOUT HIM BEING IN DANGER AND BRINGING DANGER INTO HER HOME, GEORGIE GIVES ZERO FUCKS ABOUT POLICE SHOWING UP AT HER DOOR LOOKING FOR HIM. Whatever. Whatever.

Whatever. Moving on.

Every minute Jonny and AJN aren’t running I’m getting closer.

MAG 94

Not gonna say much here. Probably. Mostly cause I won’t be able to add screenshots anymore but also cause its short and I already am shaking from trying to contain my hatred of Georgie (failed step one).

“Just fair,” she says…..

And this is the point of no return, really. Did she give him any clue before he turned the recording back on? Is that where he got the 'statement of-’ part from? Or did he just ask, knew, and she spoke. This is the first time he did this completely knowingly and with tepid grudging consent.

Sorry. Did not expect this duo of episodes tonight. Will try to reign it in.

I don’t get the Scouse thing and I don’t care to.

“She didn’t, but we went anyway.” Who actually made the decision to go? Was it Alex who went cause Georgie simply offering to be there as support made her strong enough? Was it Georgie who convinced her because they 'couldn’t do nothing’ and 'needed to help’? Whichever reason, I can see how it would make Georgie reluctant to involve herself in anything. She likely came to the conclusion that if she never involved herself in whatever Alex found out then Alex would still be… well… did any of them ACTUALLY die? Regardless.

“The moment that you die will feel exactly the same as this one.” I’m pretty sure that you’d notice the difference between, idk, sitting at your desk and having a heart attack.. or being shot… or being in a car wreck… or lying in a hospital bed… or… sorry. It’s a good line. Dying totally isn’t different than being alive.

Something people don’t talk about is the fact Georgie didn’t JUST lose Fear. She lost every emotion. And while she says she could feel again, I can’t help but feel that she actually didn’t. Or at least, she didn’t get every emotion back. So many emotions are connected to fear. Does she still feel guilt? Shame? Embarrassment? Anxiety and Worry are two she shouldn’t be able to, but we are told that she is concerned for Jon. But how can she be concerned if she’s not afraid? How can she care if she doesn’t have FEAR. Concern doesn’t come from love. It doesn’t compute to me that she is considered morally centered if she isn’t at least a little afraid of herself and what harm she is capable of. She says she’s not foolhardy and can recognize danger, and I guess that doesn’t strictly require fear, but its still a component of it. So how much of Georgie is genuine. How much is just… assessing a situation and making an appropriate approximation of emotion.

Jon wants to talk to just one person not involved in all this but Georgie implies that he only sought her out because a part of him knew about her statement and we know later on that this is a genuine function of his abilities as the Archivist, putting into question that single line of dialogue. Because how much of Jon even is Jon. How much of his choices and thoughts are his own. I wish I could screenshot the actual scene cause the way it was worded makes it sound almost like she was implying he went to her because he thought she was uninvolved right before making that implication. So close to not having his humanity and decisions questioned.

I’m going to sleep now too. Too bad about the new nightmare. Sorry Jon.