January 2026

why do u hate martin look at him

insert random martin clip here

if it’s one of the clips of martin hiting john then this question would be answered

we NEED more fat john content in this fandom it’s getting dire

martinblackwoodhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

should i post my tma character tit headcannons or is the world not ready for that yet.. is that too weird…

martin: sombre tit.


Keep reading

yall should stay tuned for my tma character boob headcannons. do you think the world is ready for that…

tim: blue-footed booby (vocal + dances. desirable. opportunistic breeder.)

sasha: nazca booby

not!sasha: masked booby (looks similar to sasha. engages in ‘antagonistic displays’)

John: peruvian booby (related to + cucked by tim)

martin: brown booby (only child. can be acting in ways sometimes considered parasitic. forced into an unsuited colder habitat.)

martinblackwoodhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

should i post my tma character tit headcannons or is the world not ready for that yet.. is that too weird…

martin: sombre tit.


Keep reading

yall should stay tuned for my tma character boob headcannons. do you think the world is ready for that…

tim: blue-footed booby (vocal + dances. desirable. opportunistic breeder.)

sasha: nazca booby

not!sasha: masked booby (looks similar to sasha. engages in ‘antagonistic displays’)

John: peruvian booby (related to + cucked by tim)

martin: brown booby (only child. can be acting in ways sometimes considered parasitic. forced into an unsuited colder habitat.)

oh and before i forget…

martin: i lowkey think martin’s one of those cis dudes that just kinda doesn’t have tits. like he’s not concave or anything but there’s just kinda nothing extra there in the slightest.

tim: tim is one of those cis guys that does lowkey have big tits (combination of genes + weight + potentially he took hrt for a bit in collage just for fun) and also he wants people to know it. those shirts are NOT staying buttoned up as soon as he leaves the workplace bro like he’s literally undoing them as he walks out the door

sasha: probably abt a B cup and she seeks out bras with stars or flowers or bug designs on them because she thinks that’s cool as hell. the insect themed ones get less use by the end of s1 😨

not!sasha: exactly like sasha but they’re flipped somehow. like they’ve switched sides.

elias: another cis guy with very little to work with in that department. he has chest hair tho that’s slightly greying and that has a slight patch missing from when og elias was smoking weed shirtless and dropped the blunt and was too high to react appropriately and now there’s just a little patch of scar tissue there and there’s just abruptly no hair there. elias hides this. (not that he’d be shirtless at work obviously but i mean like he very quickly changes the subject if it’s pointed out during sex)

jared: i reckon jared hopworth gets top surgery recreationally. he does it on himself for the practice and then grows his own tits back by mindpower just however he likes. he’s got those fuckass cartoony chainsaw style scars but like legit irl because of how much scar tissue there is in the area. he’s very proud of this.

breekon and hope have one boob each and it’s on opposite sides so there’s a complete set when they hug.

melanie: mel uses kt type that she buys in bulk and usually wears for like a week or so without switching. (not for dysphoria reasons or anything, its just a real hassle) she stopped doing this in her slaughter era because the whole process of changing it would just frustrate her and she’d start making stupid mistakes like forgetting to use nipple covers and like id imagine that a little bit of pain (like from improper removal) would be tolerable or cathartic in that situation but she does NOT want to risk tearing her nipples off or anything so she took a break for a bit and then obvs the world ended sooooo….

gerry: eye tats over his nipples because he really wants to at some point have the opportunity to go “erm… my eyes are down here ☝️” this has not happened yet because he’s never been in a situation where this could possibly apply as a line. he just doesn’t really take his top off that often and it’s a really weird line to say during sex and he 100% would not manage to pull off the vibe so he’s been disappointed so far in this regard. who could’ve seen that coming…

john: i don’t think john’s ever measured because i don’t think he’s ever needed to buy a bra (i think he went straight from like training/sports bras to binders) and like why else would he rlly. i reckon he wears the xl full tank black spectrum binder (tho he grew up w underworks and got kinda attached) and can’t rlly fully hide his chest even w the layering he uses. this works better in winter because obvs the archives are cold, but i think he’d be relatively ambivalent about his body atp and after being a passing but visible trans man for so long so like he does not have a problem with being clocked wearing a binder in like summer and stuff he’s chill w wearing just a shirt when it’s hot even if his binder doesn’t compress all that much. that said tho i don’t think he’s gone a day without wearing his binder in like a decade. he doesn’t actively seek out overbinding but if there are people around he WILL be wearing it he does not gaf. all this to say i reckon his are pretty big because i reckon he’s lowkey pretty chubby

if you have another character you wanna hear from then you’ve gotta send me an ask abt it 😇 ask me anything you wanna send me asks sooooo bad…

wait martin hit jon when?

eps 169 and 172 (that we know of) and it’s established in episode 173 that this is not necessary at all to get john out of his statement haze and that you can in fact rouse him just as quickly without causing harm at all. (presumably by gently shaking him or something but it’s unclear exactly what martin does) martin is notably unapologetic about hitting his boyfriend each time. and it took him abt 5 seconds to get to a point where he was entirely comfortable with the idea of hitting his boyfriend even in a situation where there are plenty of alternatives and plenty of time to test these alternatives (referring to 172 here specifically because id give him more grace if it happened just once while he was panicking about jude. even if he didn’t seem that panicked.)

i literally don’t understand how no-one except me seems to ever notice this 😭 like not even judgementally im just so baffled by it like can someone pls explain if they have any theories on why they missed it because like it was lowkey soooo jarring for me 😨


(receipts so you can make your own judgment:)

Does Martin and Jon even have canon races or did the fandom just decide that they were those races?

they do not have canon races or ethnicities as far as im aware. martin allegedly speaks polish and latin (badly) but that’s the closest thing to any ethnicity for either of them that i can remember. correct me if im wrong tho pls

wrathofthlamb:

I saw someone write about why they hate martin and it’s because he’s written as a “white saviour” for jon. first of all, jon has no canonical race and second, jon saves martin just as much. baffling

if this is abt me i hate martin for entirely unrelated reasons and i was talking about fandom portrayals of characters and how i think it’s interesting that characters who are granted more humanity by the fandom in podcasts without confirmed races (including malevolent when the fandom gives him a race) are more often portrayed as white. you’re mixing up a lot of my posts there to make something i never said ?😭