January 2025

if u hate him can I have him 👉👈. can i kiss him on the mouth and look at the stars with him and tell him it’s gonna be okay 🥺?

no. I will shoot him. And you. With a gun.

why would you send that to the martin blackwood hater blog, I don’t like you or him.

I can't lie I preferred disliker it made me chuckle more

ok? make your own account then? im not doing this for you

is your pfp jane prentiss :0?

yeah just a lil doodle I did of her 😋

love her sm though she’s my icon

What if I'm a martinblackwoodhater hater

What if I make a martinblackwoodhaterhater blog

do it coward you could never pull off the brand like I can

Martin Blackwood is also a Martin Blackwood hater you ain’t special 😭

ok? I’ll trust his judgement then?

Jon Sims is so fine he should've picked me instead. He didn't even gaf about Martin before. Martin used a cheat code. PMO!!!!

preach preach live your truth !!!

martin fanon has granted me a generational distrust of blonde men

tbh i didn't really hate martin until jmart became canon cuz like on his own he's FINE i guess. sorta. but now i'm basically expected to ship it and like him cuz like the whOLE FANDOM DOES and it's SO ANNOYING like I DIDN'T SIGN UP TO WATCH A ROMANCE LMAO.....i just wanted to watch the sillay scrunkly grumpy man (jon) experience the horrors with his buddies what is this shit;-;

literally omg it did NOT need to be a romance 😒

Mentally I read your posts in Martin's voice just to upset you.

Thats ok. I’m not upset because I don’t think your impression is probably very good, and I also don’t have to hear it.

I hate you so much. The idea of you brings me rage. I want to do diabolical things to you in the MEAN way i am so very angry i will make a hate page for you

yeah I get that a lot 😋

this is tje most fucking elaborate bit ive seen. keep up the good work man

anotheraccountonthisapp:

martinblackwoodhater:

not a bit

Honestly so impressed how committed to the bit you are. Respect 🙌

NOT a bit 😒

i have recommended tma to 5 different people in the past three months, and 4 of them have come out of it with martin as their favourite. solutions to this horrible problem?

you need to start propoganda early so they go into it enlightened and unbiased and hating martin. you can always convince them. it’s never too late.

Why is everyone so convinced this is a bit?? I mean, you say funny stuff. But that's because you're a funny guy. Unrelated to your Martin opinions

literally omg like please guys my opinions are real pleaseee :((

You’re like Martin’s self doubt and self-loathing made into a tumblr blog right



You’re truly,

- freaky anon

I really don’t think so actually.

I'm on my second listen of the podcast and just reached season 5. Up till now I was mostly positive-neutral on him but his attitude with regard to Jon's statements in season 5 is just. weird and horned in? Like I love season 5's statements, the fears poetry really speaks to me a lot, but having to every episode have Martin be like "I'll leave you to it then" or "I don't want to hear this" just makes him seem whiny? Like no Martin, you have the best deal of anyone on the entire planet, you are not above the suffering of others. Listen to it and actually understand the gravity of what has happened to YOUR world.

literally omg like can he have some perspective for once??

He’s so used to being self-absorbed in The Lonely obviously that he just doesn’t even begin to think about anyone else, and then he acts like that makes him better than Jon? like why is he SO self-righteous in s5 as if HE’S gonna be right rather than, yknow, the embodiment of all knowledge standing right next to him?

Are you Elias Bouchard in disguise because I’ve never met someone filled with so much hatred for Martin K Blackwood

shut up. why would i be anyone else, i am me. PEAK ☝️

my dear martinblackwoodhater,

oh my FUCK I AM SO SORRY IF PEOPLE ARE SENDING YOU THINGS… i made a silly little tiktok post and made a playful jab at you in the caption and everyone is taking it so seriously. kitten please tell me if anyone is sending you martinblackwoodhater hatemail and i will take it down…

sincerely,

the blog charlesnoentertainmentcheese/tiktok user keaytothedoor


i apologize..

oh no it’s ok dw!! if anything i want more hatemail i can never get enough of it, i love the interaction 😋😋

my dear martinblackwoodhater,

oh my FUCK I AM SO SORRY IF PEOPLE ARE SENDING YOU THINGS… i made a silly little tiktok post and made a playful jab at you in the caption and everyone is taking it so seriously. kitten please tell me if anyone is sending you martinblackwoodhater hatemail and i will take it down…

sincerely,

the blog charlesnoentertainmentcheese/tiktok user keaytothedoor


i apologize..

martinblackwoodhater:

oh no it’s ok dw!! if anything i want more hatemail i can never get enough of it, i love the interaction 😋😋

(inspired me to go worldwide btw follow me or send me hate on that hellscape too if u want 🙈)

Why does no one understand how funny you are? They seem too busy being offended to notice the next-level humour 💕 :(

too woke.

Have a picture of my cat, user martinblackwoodhater

Maybe now you will hate Martin less, just look at all the unrelated shine in this boys eyes

thank you. i will hate martin more with the reminder of who we are fighting for.

i have a question 🖐️ would you still hate martin if he was wearing a cool wizard outfit yes or no

unfortunately yes. maybe if he revealed that, since it was a podcast format, he had actually been wearing a (NOT cool) wizards outfit throughout the entire podcast, and had been dealing with the consequences from that.

actually I would still hate him. but i would be intrigued.

Alexander J Newall is that you?????


(if Martin has zero haters that man is dead)

overdone joke. i hate you. leave me alone.

honestly, the blog thats just hating on martin is like the biggest fucking red flag you're just showing to the world. like if you have such intense and visceral hatred for a fictional character that you make a whole fucking blog about it not only do you clearly not have enough good things going on in your life but you're so clearly such a spiteful and hate filled person. also just the way they respond to hatred is even fucking more of a red flag. stop being a condescending asshole, stop acting like people arent allowed to hate you because they've blocked you (like i have), and just stop responding to hate. no one wants the person they hate to be saying "awh, why?" to them when they say they hate them. i dunno if its just me but that blog is like the most clear and confident way ive ever seen someone display all of their red flags and one of the most viscerally red flag things ive seen(🗣(dont feel the need to contribute much emotional energy to this if you dont want to i just sort of needed to rant about this and i get it if you dont want to respond prioritize your mental health!!!))

magpod-confessions:

cough cough cough . i agree . i have them blocked . - deceit

no you don’t??

pls don’t btw i like seeing what ppl say about me :(( (you can block any of my hate tags - I’ve got about three - if you don’t wanna see the content though! 😋)

Are you just a Jonathan Sims yume be honest

yuri?

I'm coming for you.

- Martin Blackwood defender #872697

ok. im not threatened

thinking abt jonathan sims yuri again

you are fascinating

no i don’t think so i am just correct against the world

do you have particularly strong feelings (either love or hate) towards other characters? i would be delighted to know, if you wish to share.

tbh i don’t reallyyy like daisy, but more just because of the whole like “embodiment of police brutality” thing she’s got going on.


i like pretty much all the avatars (esp Jane <33), and i love sasha. i really just listen for the statements tho so i don’t really get into individual characters other than like jon and the avatars

I am at peace. I have realized that your opinions on a character do not affect my opinions and that we can hold hands and have harmony in the world between the martin haters and the martin likers. Because in the end it's literal fiction, and I don't have to agree with you to respect you. Also, you're quite funny, and I have the ability to block you hate tags so I don't have to interact with the hate if it makes me uncomfortable.

That was my impression of a normal Martin enjoyer, was it good?

yay!! yesyes yesd

Jon would not like you.

that’s ok. we would never meet.

for many reasons.

Hello, this is Jonathan Sims of the Magnus. Can you spare Finance?

wow Jonathan Sims of the Magnus how do i know it is really you

I am proof to yoythqt. I'm Jonatahn from Magnus. Observe.

Statement begins.

See? Money. Give me. give me Finance.

wow i cannot believe it is the real jonathan sims from Magnus. all of my money given.

Reply to my rant i am begging you. I love your way of analysis i want to know what you think

i have nothing to say im sorry…….

post it on YOUR account why r u a coward pls. i support tho i read it. i get a LOT of ppl ranting in my inbox tho and theyre all on anon 😨

guys u gotta speak your truth yourself xoxo ✊✊

I feel like most tma listeners that ship jmart fundamentally misunderstand their relationship, especially in season 5, or maybe not entirely misunderstand it rather than oversimplify it to the point of it becoming a caricature.

Its like those chatacter A character B tropes, where everything is just surface level, and the characters involved are reduced to one-dimensional distortions of who they originally were.

I mean, they tend to see it as "spooky-but-soft monster-boyfriend" Jon, and "big-protective-revenge-seeker, mr. Killing Spree" Martin. And they entirely miss the aspect of Martin being uncomfortable with Jon's need to make statements. He is surrounded by horror from all sides and yet he cannot stomach hearing his boyfriend talk about it for a little while. I understand that it is no easy task, having the terrible experiences of tortured people hammered into your skull repeatedly, but he could've at least TRIED to show some more support, ESPECIALLY since he knows firsthand what it's like to be alone when you're hoing through a difficult time.

And in the end, when he stabbed Jon with the knife, I am sure that somewhere deep down he thought that Jon deserved to die.


I don't have a problem with people liking Martin. You can enjoy whoever you want, but in my experience most Martin fans just look at him being shy and having a crush and writing shitty poetry and go "omg thats literally me!!!!1!1!" and then they don't even bother to try and think of him as a whole, separate character, rather than just an extension of themself and someone they can project onto.

i don’t listen to the main plot but yes xoxo you are so real xoxo !!!

Martin is the type of guy to point at every thrashcan he sees and say "me"

ugh he so would omgggg and then he’d be like “heh… it’s a cry for help :)” and it’s like ?? no one cares ??

Martin is the type of guy to stutter in text messages unironically

real. martin’s the type of guy to guy to go “heh… she’s right behind me isn’t she 🤓☝️” when jane’s hunting him down

Martin is the type of guy to lick a frozen telephone pole and get his tongue stuck to it

martin’s the type of guy to float in the air when he smells pie

Are you by any chance s1 jon? You just have to wait a few seasons to live martin, just you wait! <3

how can you be so condescending with such an overdone joke AND a typo 😨

Would you like Martin better if he wasn't as much of a whiny little bitch?

actually yeah it would probably help!!

He's lowkey abusive and not even in a fun way

real tbh like he did NOT need to be hitting jon. i get it was like a tense environment but i really feel like they glossed over that so much??? like he could’ve just shook him or smth to like spook him out of his statement trance thing

also if i were you i would scream at the s1 jon/alex newall/etc. comments and start beating people with rocks. you are braver than me.

thank you. it is such a struggle.

personally I think your account is very valid even as someone who enjoys Martin (like, you’re entitled to your own opinion and I can totally understand where Martin comes across as unlikable)


But I showed this account to my friend and she’s declared war upon you apparently she’s considering downloading and creating a Tumblr account just for this lmao

not bothered. tell her to send me hate herself then x

can we talk about this scene for a moment because like… ?? it’s so glossed over but martin genuinely just slapped him without really any hesitation or consideration of any other option here whatsoever - of which i believe there are many - and then literally just does not sound apologetic at all even when he’s apologising.

and then it isn’t mentioned again.

like guys i appreciate we’re in the apocalypse here, but am i genuinely meant to believe this is a relationship i should be in full support of? i just… don’t see why this was written in as a presumably positive portrayal of martin’s character.

and i get that it could be a genuinely important scene with some writing around how these high stakes or whatever cause people to become impulsive and unintentionally hurt people they love, but in that case, like… why isn’t it?

It’s just moved on from and they have some conversation about The Web with martin again getting annoyed at Jon for forces outside of his control and just not really caring about him in any way that makes the audience really see why they’d want these two to be together.

I may be biased in that point as i did, admittedly, skip the safehouse episode, which seems to be like the one where presumably they like gave all the fans a reason to root for them, so if I’m missing anything crucial from that episode then please tell me because I’m not sure I can bring myself to listen to it tbh.

(this is somewhat of a continuation of my last post, talking about mag172 - Strung Out, but it went off kinda unrelated and kinda long so I’ve split it here)


i get so many people asking me in my inbox why i don’t like Martin (with varying degrees of aggression) and I’ve never really been able to give a satisfying answer - it’s more that I’ve just never found anything truly likable about him, and then he started to become genuinely insufferable by s5 and i hadn’t had the predisposition towards him that most people do that let them glaze over and make excuses for him because they relate to him.

It would be a great answer for people, I’m sure, that I hate martin because I relate to him, but that genuinely could not be further from the truth - I don’t like him because I never had that ideal of him created through relating to him and projecting onto him, and therefore when he started to falter as a character, I started to genuinely dislike the way he acts.


While it is just a wide variety of things he does, for an actual answer the most concise singular reason I can give for why I don’t like him is because I don’t relisten to the podcast as a whole (I don’t like the main plot or many of the characters), and instead just relisten to the statements - 171, 172, and 175 are my favourites, and so they’re the ones I relisten if I want to listen to the podcast again.

These are also the episodes where Martin is particularly annoying, and, as I said 172 is the episode where he hits Jon.

Listening mainly to that episode, far more than most of the others in the podcast, and being bought out of that awesome Statement by hearing specifically the moment where he unapologetically hits Jon and then is particularly annoying, while already just not really liking him as a guy, is enough to get me to dislike him, and then the fans and the kinnies did more than enough to further the rest.

Lowkey fw you my guy, funny as hell, make my day a little brighter

On the other hand, this is Jonah Magnus from the

yayyyayaya thank you i love my fans !!

so glad nothing ominous or spooky happened offscreen after this ask. yippee just normal people in my inbox who are unrelated to plots for apocalypses or archives!! :3

hhhello Tjis. is. jane printer frkm the magnets. Watch Ouit. For my Buge gonnsa Getyoy

jane printer i love you you are everything……..

🐛🪱🐛🪱🐛🪱🪱🪱🐛🐛🐛🪱

hate how every martin fan thinks that they’re the ones doing it in a unique way

they’re not like the uwu soft martin mischaracterisation fans!! they’re not like the big strong mean martin mischaracterisation fans!! they’re a secret third thing that no-one else would ever understand ofc and everyone else is interpreting him wrong ☝️☝️☝️ (sarcasm+mockery)

its just SO pretentious?? like everyone complains about the people who mischaracterise martin but like it can NOT be that prevalent of a problem to justify this level of people wanting to be unique and going “heh… I’m not like THOSE martin fans 😎☝️”

it’s like just shut UP omg i don’t think any of them have ever had an original thought in their life 🙅‍♂️🙅‍♂️ and neither have I but at least I don’t pretend??

Lovingly of course, is Martin Blackwood's mother your favorite character?


(Actually, who is your real favorite character? I genuinely want to know :) Mine is either the monster pig that accepted the farmer as "kin" or Daisy.)

obviously not. she’s the one that made martin have all his worst hates so i hate her more than martin himself 🙅‍♂️🙅‍♂️ that’s just not a radical take at all.


ive mentioned my faves a couple times already, so if you want a simple answer just find those, but idk i just don’t really like the main plot enough to form that much of an opinion 🤷‍♂️ I like jon 🤷‍♂️

Hi ive seen your acct before and it interests me. As a Martin enjoyer theres a little part of me thats like "what why :((" but then i must remember. I am a martin enjoyer. Not a martin apologist.

While i love him as a character and think he developed nicely, i can understand why people don't like him, and i see that he has many many flaws. So now i want to know: i cant find your explanations (maybe im just not looking hard enough) so why do you dislike Martin Blackwood so much? Im genuinely curious and excited to hear your opinions, so if you've already made a post, maybe just reply with a link to it? But yeah whatever works :3

(Also just so you know the art at the header of your blog made me laugh so hard it sent me into a coughing fit lmfao)

https://www.tumblr.com/martinblackwoodhater/773055587506438144/can-we-talk-about-this-scene-for-a-moment-because?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/martinblackwoodhater/773056031079170048/this-is-somewhat-of-a-continuation-of-my-last?source=share

best(/most concise and clear) explanation I’ve given here

i have recommended tma to 5 different people in the past three months, and 4 of them have come out of it with martin as their favourite. solutions to this horrible problem?

martinblackwoodhaterhater:

martinblackwoodhater:

you need to start propoganda early so they go into it enlightened and unbiased and hating martin. you can always convince them. it’s never too late.

“unbiased and hating Martin” …so …biased? are you being stupid on purpose?

tumblr user discovers irony