so elias can see through eye iconography right. do you think he could see through Gerry's little eyes
and if he could,
approximately how hard did Gertrude's soul leave her body when she saw Gerry's cool new tattoos
100%. gerry keay, walking cctv camera. he thinks gertrude’s panic is because she’s an old woman or whatever but actually gertrude has several tattoos herself, it’s just those damn eyes she’s got a problem with.
yesterday i went to a party and i kissed this girl and she kept trying to give me her linkedin and i was like …LINKEDIN? and she said yes linkedin. so i said i dont use linkedin. do you have instagram though. and she was like yes i do have instagram. you should add me on linkedin. and i said i dont use linkedin. and she said i will add you on linkedin. and i said girl give me your instagram you are NOT flirting with me through linkedin. and she was like. ok. fine. here’s my instagram then. and gave me her instagram, which she clearly uses a lot, so it wasnt even that she only uses linkedin but rather that she just wanted to talk to me through linkedin specifically. fascinating woman if i wasnt already attracted to her her unwavering loyalty to linkedin wouldve drawn me in for sure
“so jonathan sims is the hero of the magnus archives?” jonathan sims is the protagonist. there is no hero. except adelard dekker. adelard dekker is the hero of the magnus archives
a collection of very serious lonelyeyes comics 😌 the last one is forever my favorite tma thing of all time
[Start ID: Three comics of Elias and Peter from the Magnus Archives. Elias has slicked back hair and wears dangly earrings with a closed eye at the end. He also wears a suit with a vest and tie. Peter has short hair pulled back into a ponytail and wears a sea captain’s coat along with a turtleneck sweater. He has a full beard.
1st comic: Peter looks at Elias with a serious expression and says, “Elias, I’m not budging on this. You can’t claim CO2 canisters as work expenses.”. In the next panel, Elias hums, clearly displeased. In the next panel, Elias takes out a planner and a pen, and says “Pardon me one moment.”. In the next panel he looks up at Peter with disdain and scribbles into the planner. In the last panel, Peter looks on in worry with a small blush and asks, “Wh - What are you crossing out? Elias…”. We can view Elias’ schedule within his planner that is as follows:
0900: Behold
1030: Meeting with Peter
1100: Lunch with Peter
The times are cut off the rest but the next line states “Give Peter a blowjob” and this is actively being crossed out. The next line says “Behold” which is what he intended to do after the previous line.
2nd comic: In the first panel, Elias is handing a document envelope to Jon’s hand, stating “Here are those new statements, Archivist.”. Jon accepts them and says “Yes, thank you.”. In the next panel, Jon begins to take out the statements from the envelope, saying “Huh - lighter than usual…”. Jon has short curly hair and wears rectangular glasses. In the next panel, Jon looks down in horror as what he pulls out is a photograph addressed “To Elias” with a heart next to it. Jon stutters “I-”. In the next panel, Elias looks at the photo with comically large eyes that have red in the pupils and an even more horrified expression than Jon’s. From the view of the photograph, it appears to be Peter in nothing but a hat. In the next panel, Elias dramatically snatches the photograph out of Jon’s hands with an angry expression. In the next panel, Elias holds up a different document envelope with an embarrassed expression, sweating and shaking profusely, he says “Apologies. It seems I mislabeled some files. This one is correct.”. In the final panel, there is a box with the word “Later” in it. Next to it, Elias’ face is blurred from motion and his hands are outstretched towards Peter ready to strangle him. Elias has a red slit for an eye and has a few disembodied red eyes behind him. Peter stands in front of him blissfully unaware and asks with a blush, “Hey, did you like those pictures-?”.
3rd comic: In the first panel, Elias is frothing mad, his teeth sharp and grey steam coming off him. He angrily demands, “Peter. Give me the alimony check now.” In the next panel, Peter’s disembodied hand holds up a check that Elias looks at furiously in the background. Peter asks, “Oh, this check?”. Elias is growling in the background. In the next panel, Peter waves the check with an amuses expression, saying “You have to be quicker than that, Elias”. His sentence is punctuated with a heart. In the next panel, Peter holds the check out to the side at an arm’s length with a smile. He thinks to himself, “Oh man. Heh, heh. He looks furious.”. Elias is not in the panel but his gradual scream is represented by several lowercase a’s followed by several uppercase A’s. At the rightmost side of the panel, there is a large dialogue bubble where Elias screams, “Peter!!!”. In the last panel, Peter has turned semi-transparent with clouds of fog around him. There is a loud crash and an Elias shaped hole is in the wall behind his arm, several cracks are coming off the hole as well. Peter laughs, “Holy shit, haha.” in all caps.
would’ve been so funny if when jonah was all “you have feelings for jonathan sims. lol” at martin he would’ve just smiled evilly and replied “oh but elias. so do you.” because the only thing sadder than having a crush on jonathan sims is having an unreciprocated crush on jonathan sims and being that weird about it.
i mean it could’ve never happened because of martin’s low self-esteem but the mental image is beautiful
oh my god. i fucking forgot that distracting elias was a genuine method of making sure he doesn’t spy on you. give him really complicated paperwork to make sure he doesn’t use his eldritch monster powers. “don’t worry guys i have a plan. [throws budgeting plans into the next room] GO FETCH”
yo how the fuck does this post have more than 1k notes. crazy. very proud of everybody willing to acknowledge how ridiculous and cute this man is, actually
martin/elias is an absolutely hilarious ship if you ignore the angst potential because like. they would outwardly look like a genuinely loving relationship but they’re playing 4d chess mentally the whole time. martin’s doing his whole innocent and caring sweetheart act to manipulate jonah. jonah’s doing his whole boring and non-threatening manager act to manipulate martin. it’s like a fake dating trope but both of them think they’re fooling the other into thinking it’s real
martin/elias is an absolutely hilarious ship if you ignore the angst potential because like. they would outwardly look like a genuinely loving relationship but they’re playing 4d chess mentally the whole time. martin’s doing his whole innocent and caring sweetheart act to manipulate jonah. jonah’s doing his whole boring and non-threatening manager act to manipulate martin. it’s like a fake dating trope but both of them think they’re fooling the other into thinking it’s real
thinking abt martin showing simple but genuine affection for elias and he accidentally says “i love you” and martin’s immediately like “haha. i got you you stupid idiot. i fucking got you by being a loving and supportive boyfriend. i’m gonna keep doing it anyways but i fucking got you”
i am notoriously a big fan of “jonah magnus did not enjoy being the pupil” but also there is something very important about “jonah magnus did not enjoy being a human” too. i know it’s just a silly little headcanon, but to me, he was otherkin, and being an avatar was the closest he could get to feeling like himself. being an avatar is always about fulfillment, it’s always about filling an empty space within your soul, it’s always about getting what the world has denied you.
and there’s something uniquely tragic about the idea that being the pupil wasn’t what jonah wanted, it was just the closest alternative. it was the best he could get. imagine the closest you can get to a state that actually feels like you is just being reduced to an extension of something that doesn’t even care about you. and it’s torture, but to someone who has never felt human at all, it’s the closest thing to a victory he’ll ever get.
Oh my god elias pouting and grumbling all the way whenever he has to have a work trip. "I forgot my heart shaped pancake molds!!" "It really doesn't matter elias" "shut up peter you don't know shit" looking longingly out the window like......... I miss london...... Its too hot/cold/dry in here
LITERALLY. also i am going to make this about jonah being an extension of the institute once again. literally removing the heart from the body. he gets seasick he gets homesick he starts crying and refuses to do anything. you cannot take this man away from his institute!! he will die!!!
“Ah, you’re not the Melanie King who runs Ghost Hunt UK, surely?” Listen, I know Elias most likely just used his spooky eye powers bUT! BUT!! what if he didn’t :))))
jonah magnus is that specific genre of aromantic where he only experiences romantic attraction towards objects, concepts, and places. he’s sexually attracted to a lot of people, but finds romance with humans just boring and annoying.
jonah magnus is that specific genre of aromantic where he only experiences romantic attraction towards objects, concepts, and places. he’s sexually attracted to a lot of people, but finds romance with humans just boring and annoying.
the only relationships he cares about can be categorized into sexual, romantic, psychosexual, and religious. any relationship he has with another character falls into the sexual/psychosexual category. his relationship with the panopticon is inherently sexual and religious, since it’s his church, his grave, and his home. the eye is the only true romantic partner he’s ever had.
“elias is a homophobic gay man” you say. i smile and nod. i go home. i pull out my extensive analysis of jonah magnus as a bellusromantic objectum otherkin. i whisper to myself “they’d never understand…” and i weep.
“elias is a homophobic gay man” you say. i smile and nod. i go home. i pull out my extensive analysis of jonah magnus as a bellusromantic objectum otherkin. i whisper to myself “they’d never understand…” and i weep.
he’s xenogender too. btw. he’s eyegender. this is true about all avatars. in my brain. because becoming an avatar changes everything about you, including your gender identity. michael/helen is spiralgender. jane prentiss is corruptiongender. etc etc
martin/elias is an absolutely hilarious ship if you ignore the angst potential because like. they would outwardly look like a genuinely loving relationship but they’re playing 4d chess mentally the whole time. martin’s doing his whole innocent and caring sweetheart act to manipulate jonah. jonah’s doing his whole boring and non-threatening manager act to manipulate martin. it’s like a fake dating trope but both of them think they’re fooling the other into thinking it’s real
what if they go on a trip together and martin notices elias being all homesick and upset (see also: this headcanon) and starts taking care of him…like totally ironically, of course. as a manipulation tactic. and absolutely nothing else. like yeah, sure, he keeps checking up on him and making him tea and promises that they can go home sooner than planned, but it’s just so he can use his weakness against him in the future. obviously.
What do you think is the interaction between Parasight and the Old Men Bastard Group (simon peter lukas and jonjon) Are they intrigued? Grossed out? Jealous? Delighted?
peter’s definitely grossed out, but would never pass up on an opportunity to tease the fuck out of jonah. simon is absolutely delighted and WILL ask for details. jonah’s just. suffering through it.
i think jonelias should always be about jonah’s desperation to be understood. i think he should cling to jon with both hands and sob and beg “please, please, please don’t leave, not you, you can’t leave, i need you, i need you to listen, i need to be heard, i need to be seen.”
“team archives” consists of all those bastards (jon, martin, tim, sasha, melanie, daisy, basira) and let’s just agree theyre at like…s3 era characterization (s1 for sasha obvi) IT ALSO INCLUDES ELIAS ! (and vice versa, the oiar gang includes lena)
there’s no eldritch power bullshit, this is for the pure sport of finding out which of them would do worse if put into an escape room as a corporate team building exercise im putting the psychic powers on a shelf
ceaseless watcher voice. im gonna get two avatars. one alloace, one aroallo. and theyre both gonna be little freaks
neither of them actually bother Knowing this about each other, so the way they find out is by showing up to work one day during pride month wearing their respective flags as pins and they just stare and point at each other from across the room like YOU!!!!
it’s just mildly entertaining for me to imagine elias being like “ok time to check in on the archives” somewhere around s3 and then getting hit with like 6 consecutive, self-contradictory queer awakenings.
not even a ship i just genuinely believe jude perry and jonah magnus fucked at some point. they’re both so horny about the fears. if they have met, they have fucked.
i think jonelias should always be about jonah’s desperation to be understood. i think he should cling to jon with both hands and sob and beg “please, please, please don’t leave, not you, you can’t leave, i need you, i need you to listen, i need to be heard, i need to be seen.”
i want you to know i cannot stop thinking about the phrase “dirty little eyesexual”. why do i feel like he would definitely get off on being called that
ANYways. you’re so right. no one’s ever truly Looked Back at him until jon. after two centuries of Looking, being Looked At has to be the most overwhelming, satisfying, embarrassing, relieving sensation ever. like i know we all make fun of him for the [PLEASURED EXHALATION] thing but tbh i’m impressed he didn’t start straight up moaning and crying and telling his entire life story.
honestly mentally i live in a universe where elias was just like 5% more down bad and couldn’t get anything done because everytime tim or martin or sasha said anything vaguely nice OR mean to him his brain just shortcircuited. the eyepocalypse never happened because the pupil was too busy slowly joining a polycule
i’m pretty sure mag 92 was what made me so obsessed with elias the very first time i was listening to tma. because he’s doing a whole intimidating villain thing but he'a also being kind of awkward with it. like he keeps getting interrupted in the middle of his little speeches and insisting he isn’t being controlled (objectively weird thing to say just completely unprompted) it’s like it’s his first day of being overtly evil and he’s still getting used to it. which is probably accurate like the last time he got to be so villainous was with gertrude, he’s probably a little rusty.
god I wish there was a statement about gnomes. like garden gnomes. and like the youtube videos that are like "top 10 gnome sightings!!! YOU WILL PISS YOURSELF!!!!"
true but also have you considered. saunatonttu statement.
Jonah Magnus would take you cave-exploring just to see the effect it has on you tbh (it's me. I'm the bastard obsessed with fear responses.)
tbh i feel like having him there would make the situation inherently less scary. idk if it’s just me but having somebody just staring at you while you’re scared usually just makes me go “actually yeah this shit ain’t nothing to me man”
oh my god. i fucking forgot that distracting elias was a genuine method of making sure he doesn’t spy on you. give him really complicated paperwork to make sure he doesn’t use his eldritch monster powers. “don’t worry guys i have a plan. [throws budgeting plans into the next room] GO FETCH”
I love looking at the rbs on this and seeing how many of us want to kiss this man
jonah stumbling out of the tma fandom covered in lipstick marks like a cartoon character
hi. im here to throw some ships at you, like jon/the archives, and jonah/the panopticon and the research department/some random researcher it developed a crush on. now i leave to develop some more free range organic insane tma ships. youre welcome
your brain is so huge and i would kill someone in your name.
i love that simon fairchild and mike crew have the exact same sense of humor, but simon’s obviously way further into it than mike. mike will give you some tea and have a civil conversation with you, you really have to push him to get him to toss you into the vast. with simon, your fate is entirely dependant on how much fun he has talking to you. and they both think your fear is hilarious.
