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not-the-cheese:

one sentence summaries of every TMA episode

(1-60 i’ll add more soon)

part 2 up!

  1. world’s most effective anti-smoking PSA
  2. man DOES NOT open coffin. everyone claps.
  3. woman is judgemental towards neighbor even though she has hobbies that are just as weird.
  4. book makes multiple people fall off chair.
  5. man finds bag of teeth and decides he absolutely needs to fuck around and find out.
  6. worm sti.
  7. there was a SCARY MAN in the WAR.
  8. fuck this tree
  9. well at least ted bundy was a great father :)
  10. i’m like 55% sure vampires are real and i’m willing to take those odds
  11. bitches be dying. you’re next.
  12. we kill this man because he made the soda too warm.
  13. sorry ur husband’s dead. maybe get some help.
  14. Unbox with me ! (GONE WRONG)
  15. hah i’m safe from this one because i have decided to Never Go Into a Cave Ever.
  16. man is so annoying about this spider that even his cat can’t be bothered
  17. man’s bully finds a book about a Bone Turner and subsequently begins turning people’s bones.
  18. this guy sucks at DIY home improvement
  19. aw maybe this priest didn’t do anything THAT bad!
  20. oh fuck nevermind
  21. THE SKY ATE MY SON.
  22. the worms stole my identity. i haven’t left the house in days.
  23. man beats german children at game of bravery and wins a coin (he later loses this coin)
  24. my ex boyfriend gets casted in the muppets and dies
  25. sorry mom, i’ve abandoned jesus for a new religion : jesus in the dark.
  26. tall squiggly and HANDsome
  27. old man arm wrestles demon through door knob
  28. the buzzfeed unsolved guys finally catch a ghost but it’s their sound tech
  29. immortality but at what cost
  30. working at the big meat factory was so traumatizing it made me vegetarian
  31. i go to america and get almost killed by a furry
  32. well if you love that wasp nest so much why don’t you MARRY it (and then she did)
  33. antisocial boat crew bands together to exclude one guy from a midnight party. he dies from the rejection.
  34. bone apple teeth
  35. remember when that norwegian guy threw a tantrum about us not digging a hole? turns out we were right to not dig that hole.
  36. babe come over my parents have taken ill and passed away
  37. man fucks around and it costs him everything
  38. HOMOPHOBIC CHINESE VASE
  39. oh god oh fuck the worms are here
  40. thank you for participating in worms! please rate your wormsperience from 1 to 10.
  41. the wormsperience has left me deeply scarred. i’m going to get lost in a tunnel about it.
  42. 🎸music makes me loose control🎸
  43. spooky stories to tell at the next police slumber party
  44. child threatens to run away and join the circus one too many times, and now the circus has come to cash in.
  45. these mosquitoes are mad sus
  46. man frequents local barnes and noble and then dies(?) after liking a book too much.
  47. realtor gets eaten by the backrooms twice. it’s a terrible shame.
  48. both me and this weird goth dude have an unsatisfying italy vacation
  49. guy who turns people’s bones gets a new job where he continues to turn people’s bones.
  50. man who should never be allowed to build prisons builds a prison.
  51. Something Big Is In The Water.
  52. what if u heard me about 15 feet behind you fumbling around and calling out ur name 😳 (and we were both prison guards)
  53. i’m going to be honest i didn’t retain anything from this episode except that this guy has the silliest old man voice ever
  54. everybody hates the tax man, including these creepy taxidermy animals
  55. hmmgh. ant house.
  56. so turns out being only 55% sure that vampires are real in my career as a vampire hunter has had some consequences.
  57. the only thing keeping you company in space is your abandonment issues
  58. 🎶 the snack that smiles back 🎶 (my husband!)
  59. maybe the real treasure was the house siblings we encased in spider web along the way.
  60. your dead brother wrote books about ancient myths and WHAT

Part 2