2025-01-17 19:06:22 ¶ ●

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There’s like a whole stack of tests before the doom one, all reading like either fortune cookies, just those daily affirmations you see on tear away calenders, or cryptic warnings that all read like someone translated them eight times through a bad translation app.

Jon’s just like one of these has got to be normal, as he throws one of the fortune cookie ones that reads: An unexpected event will soon make you say, "Well, that was awkward." Lucky Numbers: 3, 7, 15, 24, 33, 42.

(Since it’d been a while this was for the Jondistortion pregnancy posting and all the weird fucked up pregnancy test results he’d get lmao)

Lmaoooo. Jon gives up on the default two-line tests and tries something that just reads out “pregnant” or “not pregnant.” He doesn’t really believe it will work but neither does he have any better ideas, and besides he’s so curious about what could happen. They are as unhelpful, cryptic, and vaguely ominous as the other tests and he soon gives up on them too. Maybe needs to find a discreet way to sneak them into artifact storage too, because looking at them too long gives Jon a headache and he’s a little worried about what they might start doing if left to their own devices lmao.