2023-02-01 2:05:28 ¶ ●

OK but if TMA was really an office comedy then in MAG 153 when Trevor and Julia were gonna kill Jon, Trevor would’ve said “Any last words?”, and then Jon would say “uhh…. Yeah, guess how old I am.” and Trevor would’ve pushed his chair over.

2023-02-05 0:15:46 ¶ ●

I’VE BEEN SO CONFUSED FOR THE ENTIRE YEAR SINCE I STARTED LISTENING TO TMA ABOUT THE QUOTE THAT MENTIONS JON’S ASEXUALITY AND ‘WHAT ELIAS SAID TO MELANIE’ AND IT TURNS OUT I JUST NEVER LISTENED TO THE SECOND HALF OF MAG 106???? WHAT THE FUCK… YOU GUYS HAD ALL THIS, THIS WHOLE TIME??? HOW DID I MISS THIS IN LIKE, 5 COMPLETE RELISTENS???

2023-02-12 5:05:14 ¶ ●

Martin’s always a carer, a protector, a helper… Someone who’s willing to jump in and do what’s needed, someone that watches out and tries to predict what’s going to happen so he can help, so he can stop things from going wrong.

I don’t need to tell you that this is probably a product of his mother’s behaviour; if he kept everything in check then what reason would she have to hate him anymore? It never worked, of course, but that’s besides the point.

We see it too in early seasons. Anyone would be eager to impress their boss (particularly if they’re in love with them), but Martin’s eagerness is always filled with such care, such desperation to please. Just because a trait came from a bad place, does not necessarily mean it is a bad thing.

Along with this, his Web-like desire to keep things under control makes him irreplaceable, a valuable person to have around, because he’s entirely unable to conceive that he could be valuable solely as himself. He’s so devoted to others that committing himself to the lonely to save them was an obvious choice, which says more on the matter than I ever could.

These traits all shine through particularly visibly when things are out of control, like during Daisy’s appearance in season 5. From the beginning of the situation it’s clearly not going how it’s supposed to, and Martin finds himself alone faced by a monster that he can do nothing about.

Without Martin there, there’s a chance that Basira and Jon could’ve missed Daisy altogether, so as usual he’s responsible for holding things in place, but as the situation degrades so does his handle on it. Of course his kindness makes it hard to deal with, makes him flinch at the wrong moment-what’s another thing to blame himself for?

But when Daisy attacks Jon, that’s when things really fall apart. Seeing his partner at risk and in pain after the comfort of his resistance to injury? Attacked not only by a beast, but one that was a friend at some point, if she ever really was… Perhaps this was what was in front of him the whole time but he never could bring himself to look hard enough.

Jon trying to sacrifice himself, Basira trying to take action, Daisy uncontrollable; all Martin has in him is to yell! To scramble for control and some semblance of survivability. And there’s no relief at Jon’s release, the mess carries on.

The injury is bad. The type of wound that makes you feel the blood drain from your face, that makes you want to burst into tears, but no, there’s no time for that. Feeling emotions is not as important as regaining composure. But God, there’s barely enough time to even help Jon, Basira needs guidance too, if she can’t go through with this who knows what will happen?

Basira and Jon are living through the experience whilst Martin tries to control it, but some things cannot be controlled and there’s simply no use trying to fight against the tide. Nothing could be done to change the outcome, but if Martin doesn’t try then of course it’s his fault.

Whatever he did, things would end the way they did. You can hear him reaching out though, desperately trying to keep the group tied together; being bound by the archives was awful but at least the group was kept together to some extent.

But here there’s nothing he can do. Their paths have parted, things play out the way they always would, and they’re sent marching towards their awful fate.

2023-02-17 16:14:34 ¶ ●

Me, on trial for two murders that I may or may not have committed: Your honour, I’m LITERALLY in my Jonathan Sims era.