2022-12-26 3:44:19 ¶ ●

## Oddly specific, mundane things that are aligned with the 15 fears:

The Eye- Making deep eye contact with a stranger on the platform as the train pulls away.

The Hunt- Wanting something so badly that you can’t stay still anymore.

The Buried- Trying to get your phone back when it falls between your bed and the wall

The Vast- Being a child and hearing about how unknowably large Chuthulu is for the first time.

The Flesh- Looking in the mirror and realising your body’s changed since the last time you really looked.

The Lonely- Realising you’re the only customer at the supermarket.

The Corruption- When you see one ant but once you’ve focused on it you can see the rest of them.

The End- Holding an antique object and knowing that it’s original owner is long dead.

The Desolation- That gut wrenching feeling when you’ve lost something you know you’re not going to be able to get back.

The Stranger- Looking into the eyes of a loved one and not being able to see anything you know in there.

The Spiral- When you say something loud enough to be heard and absolutely nobody processes it or responds.

The Dark- Straining your eyes to try and see something at the end of an unlit corridor that you swear you could almost see.

The Slaughter- Ripping up a letter with your full name and address on and throwing it in the bin.

The Extinction- Being the last player left alive in a survival game and realising that in another life that could happen for real.

The Web- That burning, guilty feeling after you’re manipulated into doing something you didn’t want to do.

2022-12-27 22:04:43 ¶ ●

The things we leave behind are often thought of as irrelevant- it’s not what we leave behind, but who. I would argue, however, that what we leave can say much about how we lived, which leads me onto my point: what did Jon and Martin leave behind?

By the end neither of them really had many belongings. Martin might’ve had a flat during season 4 but the chances of him keeping it or anything in it when moving to the safe house are quite slim. At the point of moving there they each had all they’d be able to carry on a train to Scotland, not leaving much space for sentimentality.

But when the apocalypse started how much of this would survive? The cabin was the epicentre of the change, would anything there really last in a meaningful way, return to normal? But of course they did take some things with them.

Martin jokes about the bandages turning into snakes, so clearly they’ve had issues with some of their own belongings changing based on domains, so even what was valuable enough to bring with them could have been discarded.

Everything that survived the journey with them would have ended up in their makeshift home of the tunnels under the institute. No doubt it ended up spread out through their shared space, a homely mess, but as we all know there was no chance that it would ever last.

As the institute crumbled and Jon bled in Martin’s arms they were lost, evidence of their existence crushed and broken down to dust; but not all of it. Passed off to Basira, abandoned in a location that somehow survived.

One golden lighter with a spiderweb design, and one tape recorder loaded with the last conversation of Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood. Their remains.