jon keeping michael around to open packages for him so he doesn’t need to get scissors
using michael’s horrible sharp fingers as letter openers
can opener
YES! make michael chop vegetables too while you’re at it
get yourself a boyfriend who is also a blender
Michael, wiping adhesive residue from his fingers: am i just a sharp edge to you :-(
jon eating healthy for once in his life because he can now absentmindedly pass michael a pile of fruit and a cup and get a hand mixed smoothie back in seconds
you can’t quit from the magnus institute and so michael is technically still an archival assistant and therefore he has to make the archivist smoothies 😔
They open a Jamba Juice in the breakroom where Michael is the only employee.
no one besides jon even WANTS the weird thoroughly fingered smoothie. michael is there anyway!
Nikola, holding up two different things of moisturizer: this is CUTICLE cream! It goes on your CUTICLES and ONLY on your cuticles. This is FACE cream! It goes on your FACE and ONLY on your face! I know you’ve never USED these so i’m TEACHING you! You are SUCH a good STUDENT, Archivist, and now your hands won’t CRACK in the WINTER anymore! Wont that be NICE? Haha, not that you’ll need to DEAL with silly things like WINTER for much longer!
jon, tied to the chair and gagged, looking like a sad wet rat:
