Jonathan Sims, Head Weirdguy of the Magnus Institute
[Image ID: A digital drawing of Jonathan Sims from The Magnus Archives. He has short dark hair streaked with gray, and medium dark brown skin. He is wearing a white collared shirt, green vest, and square glasses. He is shown from the shoulders up facing the viewer, and is holding a sheet of white paper and speaking into a tape recorder with a serious expression. Eyes peek out from behind peeling, off-white wallpaper. /.End ID]
[ID: jonah magnus from the magnus archives. Jonah is a white thin man with light blonde hair styled in short waves. One of his eyes is green and the other is obscured in shadows but gleaming red. He is wearing Victorian clothing —an olive jacked with a brown vest and white shirt underneath. He has a black bowtie and brown gloves. He is smiling with one hand raised elegantly towards his face. Behind him is the transgender pride flag, and he has black accent lines around his head.]
shout out to villain of the decade elias bouchard for having audacity to call the cops on HIMSELF while he read his dead ex’s love letters to a fucking tape recorder
tma fans have the collective literacy of a peanut you bitches honest to god think the guy who has to beg on his hands and knees for donations to run his non profit academic institute of the occult is somehow an elon musk allegory? are you stupid? do you have worms in your brains? do you know what an institute IS?
concept: top surgery with no nipples and in place of them i get hyperrealistic eyes tattooed on my chest so that when i take off my shirt you just see: 👁👁
u know what. I bet the reason the Magnus Institute is looked down on by academics is bc Jonah violently disagrees with historians on several key points about history that he witnessed but that is misunderstood bc there’s no evidence and keeps trying to get ppl to change their assessment. so all the academic institutions think that every head of the Institute is just insane and judges the whole organization by that.
actual historian: these two men had a very close friendship-
200-year-old haunted eyeballs possessing the body of a man with no academic qualifications or credibility: they were fucking.
actual historian: can you tell me your source for that?
200-year-old haunted eyeballs vividly remembering the orgy he once attended with both the men in question: no.
the real reason jonah wanted to document everything was to have a source for the next orgy he gets asked about 200 more years down the road
my mental image of peter is just. the most generic stock photo businessman imaginable. a billboard looking man. you expect him to start selling you insurance almost before you see him
EXCEPT
he’s always wearing a stupid captain’s hat and never takes it off. the privileges of an audial medium means that you cant prove he ISN’T constantly wearing a stupid hat whenever he shows up.
alternatively, if you wanted a higher ratio of Sea Captain vs Trust Fund Beneficiary, heres a version with a beard:
*hot n cold by katy perry plays omniously in the far distance*
imagine peter trying to do his job and elias just hopping on the telescope’s channel and complaining about jon in like s1
also like the lonely and the beholding are quite intertwined (esp with all the different marriages between peter and elias). so i wanted to incorporate that into the anker on peter’s hat
ok so i made the mistake of standing on the beach in the dark and listen…….. listen. there is nothing that cares about you less than the ocean in the dead of night. it is tangible. you can’t fuckin see a thing. there is no horizon. it’s a ceaseless void and she cares for no one and loves nothing. you have to respect her bcs she clearly has no fuckin love for you and if she wanted she could take you and NO ONE WOULD KNOW
I love a character who’s like “I know exactly who I am and I’m being very authentic about it” and then when you analyse his behaviour even a little bit you realise his self perception is completely selective and delusional.
this has probably been said before but i think it would be funny if elias just gave jon the archivist job for being ace
i mean it’s not like he’s a prude—there’s Literally nothing he hasn’t seen before—but babysitting a fledging avatar is tedious enough without waiting for them to use up all their vacation time abusing the power of the Eye and it’s physically impossible to fire them
pre-s1 tim: hey elias why the hell did you skip over sasha for the promotion??? she’s literally better than jon in every conceivable way???
elias, scrambling for an explanation that will raise fewer questions than his personal policy against giving the archivist job to anyone who fucks: uh. because i hate women
[ID: tags from op that read “tim: but gertrude was a woman! elias (panicking and doubling down): she was a fucking WHAT” end ID]
actually while i’m here: jonathan “gotta compromise the structural integrity of my skeleton before i jump into the Crush You To Death Dimension” sims is fucking COASTING on the quality of his voice. this man impulse-murdered a coffee table with an axe because he was pissed at the eldritch being imprisoned within it and was SURPRISED when destroying the horror prison released the horrors. by season 2 he is accusing his coworkers of murder for being nice to him and is literally on a first name basis with the autonomous physical manifestation of losing your mind. he makes the most absurd possible choice at every turn and somehow STILL manages to come across as straitlaced and reasonable because he talks like if a bbc documentary voiceover was disappointed in you personally
Actually the Top Jon Moment of All Time is when he spends the entirety of season 1 building up the idea that hes a hard weathered skeptic who doesn’t believe in any supernatural bullshit and then as soon as he has an emotionally vulnerable moment where it’s outed that this isn’t true he IMMEDIATELY asks his coworker if he’s a ghost. Like no hesitation at all. This man’s reputation gets shoved in the grave and he just grabs a shovel and starts burying it
favorite character havers: this is my fave :) i just think their design and character arc are neat :)
blorbo havers: this is my SCRUNKLIEST little guy and NO one fucking understands them like i do. i found them when they were living alone in a cave and nearly feral but i never gave up on them and NOW they don’t even bite when i put them in the microwave and watch them spin. they’re my best friend and my worst enemy AND my therapist. we share an unbreakable bond
There, within the thing that pretends to be a cabin, is the one you love. You hold each other, whisper words of reassurance, but the place knows this comfort to be a lie, and laces upon it instead the awful fear of losing what you have.
To say I don’t remember would be…disingenuous of me. I do remember those final months and moments. The pain, anguish, and fear…
The most wracking of pains that strained my mind and body.
I remember the Doctor’s visit. Him standing by my bedside with concern.
I wish I had been a better husband. A better lover.
Could have helped the man I would give the entire world for. Yet when I searched the world for him, I never could find a trace…
I do not know how I am here again. I have no affiliation to the Dread Powers that Jonah was ever so fascinated by… But all that matters to me is that my beloved is here. This time I will not lose him.
Perhaps in this time, in this life, we can properly be wed.
I love you you who watch and know and understand none I love you all that crawls I love you all that chokes I love you all that blinds I love you all that falls I love you all that twists I love you all that leaves I love you all that hides I love you all that weaves I love you all that burns I love you all that hunts I love you all that rips I love you all that bleeds I love you all that dies
These evil old men deserve a creepy pet cat. Peter also deserves some dangly earrings - Elias shouldn’t have all the fun! (They’re little sailboats made from seaglass <3)
