I’m going to blatantly copy and paste things I said on Discord here, but.
Something I find interesting is that there was no way for a human to know exactly what the post-change world would be like. Jonah threw himself into that unknown rather than face the possibility of death, he assured himself of his place in the new world almost blindly. I don’t think he just never stopped to consider that in two centuries. I think the goal of being the only victorious fighter, of transcending everything mattered more to him than the specifics of what could happen. This leads me to conclude that what he fears of death isn’t the unknown per se but the thought of the utter powerlessness that comes with it; he wanted to place himself beyond it, and whatever that entailed (good or horrific) he wanted it to be by his own hand.
This (the desperation to not be a passive victim) is why I think him having a history of hurt is compelling. There is a sense of inferiority in being hurt. The idea of being shaped by misfortune or external influence feels like an outright violation. But if you look at your hurt straight on, and say, “no, this won’t merely shape me; I am mine alone” and intellectualise it until it’s so far beneath you it can’t touch you… You can reach the illusion that it never affected you.
And that’s why you can’t let yourself be hurt again, can’t let it touch you. That’s why, I think, Elias’s first response when threatened is to strike first and to do so brutally. I think that one of the things he fears most is fear itself. The idea of being prey.