reblogging once more cause i have again been thinking about the fact that these losers have a literal, physical couple’s portrait in their house. at some point they must have sat down and Essek said dear i want to look at our nerd faces smiling happily next to each other every day, and a mirror is not enough, so i would like to commission an artist to paint us like a proper married couple. we will sit here for hours while Jester flings dick jokes at us, and paint at our walls. some time in the future i want a random guest in our house to point at this painting and ask what the fuck is that so i can nonchalantly and offhandedly respond ‘oh, that’s my partner’. i think that specifically would be really romantic
wait….
Wait…
WAIT!!
If Jester painted this, then where is the hidden dick?
fun fact: this painting did have a hidden dick in it, but i ended up not including it because it just didn’t look good and was a bit too crude for the mood i wanted to depict.
i snuck in something else instead though 😏
(Woke up, wrote a teeny fic, you know how it is)
Essek’s one rule: no hidden dicks.
Jester said, “aw, man, c’mon!” which meant not that she was put out, but would adhere to Essek’s stipulation, but that she’d absolutely be putting a hidden dick in there.
So Caleb and Essek (mostly Essek) just had to be really good at finding them and asking her to paint them out.
Five times over the course of the sitting, Essek looked at the portrait and said something to the effect of, “Jester, this is lovely, but I said ‘no hidden dicks,’ please paint that one out.” It became a game to her—once, she cleverly almost caught him by painting one more obvious dick and a subtler one in the shadows under the windowsill. Essek caught them both, when Caleb nudged him to indicate that one had been left.
Essek also caught the goofy little Tusktooth smile lingering secretly in the woodgrain of his desk, but he pretended not to see it, so that Jester, pleased enough with managing to get that much over them, would quit while she was ahead.
After the sitting, Caleb was looking with great satisfaction at the completed piece, the colors perfectly suited to compliment their home, the two of them easy and animated and themselves in a way only Jester’s style could capture.
“Agh! When did she have time to do this!?”
Ah. So he’d found the one on the doorframe.
as far as i’m concerned this is exactly what happened