## Preface

AFK: Holiday Echoes
Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/8787562.

Rating:
  Mature
Archive Warning:
  Rape/Non-Con
Category:
  F/M
Fandom:
  Critical Role (Web Series)
Relationships:
  Percival "Percy" Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III/Vex'ahlia, Saundor/Vex'ahlia (Critical Role)
Characters:
  Percival "Percy" Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III, Vex'ahlia (Critical Role), Saundor (Critical Role), Velora Vessar
Additional Tags:
  Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Abusive Relationships
Language:
  English
Series:
  Part 4 of AFK: an MMO AU
Stats:
  Published: 2016-12-08 Words: 6,676 Chapters: 1/1

# AFK: Holiday Echoes

by Shippeh

Summary

> Vex'ahlia drags Percy home to the Vessars for Christmas.

Notes

> --If you are wary about the content warnings please know that you can skip the italicized chunks and still read a 100% complete christmas AFK story!!

## AFK: Holiday Echoes

Vex hefted her luggage up onto the curb and tugged the handle until it clicked into place, leaning on it carefully as she eyed her family home in the yellow lamplight. It looked lovely in the winter, covered in sheets of glittering snow, elegant strings of white light hanging from the eaves; a perfect Christmas Eve landscape. In the spring, gardeners worked hard to lay out patterns of annuals, bright colored flowers that would die by the fall just to be replaced again by underpaid hires in the next year. She’d always thought they looked so fake, pristine- orderly gardens and carefully trimmed hedges. The snow looked real. You couldn’t control how the snow fell, and couldn’t change its beautiful drifts. It covered the giant house like a cozy blanket and made it look friendly.

Vax always said it looked cold and forlorn in the winter. He liked the flowers. Once, he'd asked for a section to plant some things himself, and dad had shrugged and given him a corner behind the house. He'd spent hours out there, digging and planting and pulling weeds. Unfortunately, whatever he tried, Vax lacked any sort of green thumb and the whole thing looked like a dying mess until Vex took to sneaking out and fixing things up when he wouldn't notice.

God, that was so long ago.

The trunk slammed shut and Vex turned to watch Percy tip their Uber driver (she had stopped asking how much, but she knew he always over-tipped). "Feeling better, dear?"

"Much better, now that we're on solid ground," he replied, joining her on the sidewalk. She watched him eye the house up and down, and wondered what he was thinking. It wasn't a mansion, but it was big enough that anybody who didn't know better might call it one anyway. He didn't talk much about his family, but Vex was pretty sure that he'd grown up in a house twice this size. Percy's face was blank in the lamplight, most of it hidden by the high collar of his winter coat, but Vex allowed herself to indulge in the thought that he found the Vessar estate lacking.

The car started behind them and drove off, and as Vex turned her head to watch it round the corner, she felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. "Is it too late to back out?"

"Nervous?" he asked, pulling her gloved hand into his and dragging her gaze away from the empty street.

"Aren't you?"

"Absolutely."

She laughed, warm puffs of her breath visible in the cold air. At least she wasn't the only one.

Sometimes, she catches a glint in Vax's eye that hints at pity, a shard of sorrow that digs at her heart until she looks away, avoiding it. He's never liked Saundor. He's being over-protective, and jealous. She stays more nights in her boyfriend's (oh, fiance now! she corrects herself, excited) - in her fiance's beautiful apartment than she spends at home, and he just misses her, she knows. Saundor says this is normal- who wouldn't want to spend as much time as possible with the beautiful Vex'ahlia? Eventually, her brother will have to realize twins aren't stitched together forever.

"You always have a place here," Vax tells her, constantly, over and over. He stopped yelling ages ago, but a creeping part of Vex wishes he would still yell, and argue, and drag her sleeves up to see the marks on her wrist. ("It's all just fun," she'd insist, laughing at him for never having been in a serious relationship.) The anger would be better than his sad disappointment and repetitive reminder that he would always wait for her.

Vex paused at the door, wondering if she needed to knock, or if she could just walk in. Family didn't have to knock, but she wasn't family- It had been made clear a long time ago that this wasn't her home. It would hurt, though, to knock and have the door opened by a maid. She should just walk in and shout a hello into the foyer, right? What would Vax do?

Fortunately, before she had to face the embarrassment of that decision, the door opened on its own, warm light spilling out onto the snow. "Vex!" shrieked a voice, and then she was bodily embraced by a small girl who actually wasn't so small, not anymore.

"Velora!" Vex replied, relief heavy in her voice as she hugged the girl back. She barely had to lean down at all to hold her now- god, it'd been too long since she'd been here. "Velora, darling, when did you get so big?"

"I'm five foot and one inch, which you'd know if you followed my Instagram," Velora mumbled into her jacket, clinging tightly and apparently just as reluctant to let go as Vex was.

"What's Instagram?" Vex joked, and when Velora pulled out of the hug to stare horrified, she winked. Velora rolled her eyes, grabbing Vex's sleeve to drag her in out of the winter air. Percy followed, dragging the suitcase over the threshold with a click-click before letting the heavy door shut behind them.

"Where's Vax?" Velora demanded, pulling at the edges of her pink sweater in a casual imitation of Vex's favorite nervous tic.

Vex unzipped; after standing too long out in the cold, she was sweltering in here. The large foyer fireplace kept it warm even with the high, vaulted ceilings. "I told you he wasn't coming," she said, shrugging out of the heavy coat before kicking her wet boots off. She dropped the coat on top of them and nudged the whole pile to the side, not bothering to care about getting the tiled floor wet. "He's out with his girlfriend's family this week."

"Oh." Vex watched her sister's eyes fall, her eyebrows come together in a thoughtful wrinkle that resembled too closely their father.

"We'll Skype him later," she promised, resisting the urge to tweak that expression off Velora's scrunched face. She wasn't a baby anymore, and probably wouldn't appreciate it (and it might also mess up her layers of delicately done make-up).

"Well, we postponed dinner for you, and I'm starving," Velora said, hands on her hips, disappointment forgotten in a flash.

"Are we staying in my old room?"

"Maybe, I think so."

Belatedly, Vex remembered that the twin set of rooms she and Vax had grown up in were transformed into stately guest rooms long before her little sister would have been old enough to remember. "We'll go shove our stuff away and be right there for dinner, then, okay? Go tell them we're here," Vex laughed, waving her off. "Come on, Percy-"

He was still wearing his heavy coat, idly leaning his weight on one foot, and she realized with a small shock that she hadn't even bothered to introduce him, letting him stand there like a dead weight in the entryway. "Uh, that was my sister. Velora," she told him, too late.

"I assumed," Percy replied, and he smiled at her but it was small, forced, and made her feel like a terrible host. She'd dragged him all the way here on a plane that made him sick to a house that made her sick and he hadn't complained once. He stepped close and raised his hand to her face, cupping her chin and pressing his thumb to the down-turned corner of her mouth. "It's alright," he assured her, "you're excited."

"Not sure that excited is quite the right word," she mused, leaning into his palm. Velora hadn't even so much as spared Percy more than a brief glance, ignoring him completely. Vex had hoped for better, but she knew how well Velora had liked the last man she'd brought home- not at all, and for good reason.

"Apprehensive?"

"Anxious."

"Well, if it helps," Percy said softly, leaning close and gently kissing her over his thumb on the corner of her mouth, continuing as he pulled away, "I'm terrified."

"Don't be," she said, reaching a hand out to finger the buttons on his coat, "he's not going to like you anyway."

"Is that supposed to relax me?"

"Is it working?"

"Not even a little."

She couldn't help it; she laughed. A nervous, small laugh, but it drew a faint smile across his lips as well as hers. Vex withdrew her hand from his chest, eyeing his wet boots and thick downy coat. "Aren't you hot? Want to take that off?" He hesitated, a soft hum his only reply, and she realized her mistake. "Let's go toss our things upstairs," she suggested, looping her arm in his, "We can get your other one out of the suitcase."

Their first fights feel insignificant at the time.

Her job at the park is new, and she's been working long hours trying to figure it out and earn her place there. She's suddenly in charge of five separate parks in the distract, four of which she's never been to in her life. It's stressful, and she's exhausted, coming home in the afternoon to collapse on Saundor's leather futon. (It's not very comfortable at all, and her skin sticks to it, but admittedly, it looks lovely and smells even lovelier).

He comes home soon after, lugging a stack of books that land next to Vex with a heavy thud. He pulls on a smile, leaning to give her a quick kiss on the cheek as he carefully toes his boots off, knocking them onto the mat next to hers. "How was your day?" she asks.

"Busy," he calls from the kitchen. "What's for dinner?"

She shrugs, though he can't see her. "I dunno. I'm not really hungry."

"I'm starving," he says.

"There's leftovers in the fridge," she suggests, pushing aside a book that has slid too close.

There's a long pause before he speaks. "You're not cooking?"

Why would she cook? She just spent ten heavy hours slogging through mud in the new baseball diamond at the biggest park. She's not hungry. The tone of his voice, though, carries a chill she doesn't like. She leans forward, hands on the edge of the leather, unsure if she's going to stand or not. "I can heat you some soup or something-" she offers, hesitating.

"Don't bother." He's still in the kitchen, and she wishes she could see his expression. Is he mad? Has she done something wrong?

"It's not an issue," she promises, "I can do it real quick."

"If you're not even going to eat, then don't cook."

"Alright," Vex agrees, settling back on the futon. She's on edge now, though. He sounds mad. She doesn't understand why he might be mad. It isn't like she's his housemaid, or like they've some kind of agreement involving her as a personal chef. He doesn't have to sound so angry, for fuck's sake, hiding out in the kitchen. Well, he's had a long day too. He's probably just tired.

Loud noises from the kitchen make her jump, but he doesn't say anything else. She thinks that maybe her casual agreement was the wrong answer, but if he wanted her to make him something, he should have said so. She'd even offered. Vex rolls her eyes, deciding he's being childish.

The chill in the air for the rest of the night doesn't feel childish.

Later, she'll think back on that particular moment (one of many moments, most forgotten) and wish she'd somehow known better.

Dinner started off exactly as Vex had expected, which was to say, awful. After the formal greetings and "I see your brother has neglected to join us," only the heavy knock-knock-knock of the ancient grandfather clock in the corner broke the thick silence of an awkward family meal. She pushed bits of salad around her plate, burying tomatoes beneath slowly wilting leaves, and hoped to god there weren't too many courses coming.

Percy wasn't faring much better, she noticed, glancing over; he wasn't playing with his food like she was, but his fingers clutched his salad fork hard enough that his knuckles were starting to pale. His hand rested against the table, shaking lightly, meal untouched. She could feel his leg tapping nervously under the table, and pressed her left hand over his knee.

She shouldn't have dragged him out here. She probably shouldn't have come at all, not alone, not without Vax- especially not with some new boyfriend that she hadn't mentioned beyond adding him to the RSVP.

(What kind of fucked up family sends their own daughter a formal RSVP to Christmas?)

But she had come, and she had pulled Percy away from his sister for the holidays because she was selfish and needed to see her own sister, but couldn't bear to do it alone. Not that Cassandra had minded, or so she claimed- "Please," she'd said, "Percival hasn't left this place since we moved in. I would love a few nights alone."

Sitting across from Vex, Velora was so far the only one eating, crunching croutons and glancing back and forth between her parents. Devana, her mother, had her long, manicured nails wrapped around the stem of a white wine; Vex hadn't seen her drink much of it yet, but was sure she knew the potential to go south that this Christmas Eve dinner had. Once she'd grown out of her teens and learned to accept that Devana's very existence wasn't part of a universal conspiracy to spite her, Vex had grown to like the woman.

(Once, Vex had dared to ask how she could bear to stay with Syldor. Devana had raised her eyebrows, met Vex's eyes dead-on, and said, "I'm not your mirror." It had taken her a long, long time to puzzle out what that line had meant.)

"What time is the party tomorrow?" Vex asked, as a smiling maid started clearing salad plates.

"Cocktails begin at four," her father replied.

"Oh, good," she said, and only then did he turn towards her, eyebrows raised. "I was hoping we'd get some time with Velora tomorrow before the event."

Nothing could ever be easy. "She's got work to help with before the party," Syldor replied. "I doubt there will be much time for that."

"Aw, dad, what?" Velora whined, looking first towards her father and then turning wide eyes on her mother, who set her wine glass down carefully with a soft sigh. Vel had always had beautiful puppy-dog eyes, Vex remembered, having fallen prey to them easily many times- but the contour of dark eyeliner and long (probably fake) lashes added a level that was going to destroy her dates in a few years.

"Well, I'm sure they've some spare time. Most of the prep has been done already."

"We've a lot of important people coming tomorrow, Dev."

"Two of whom are your daughter and her gentleman."

There was a long moment of silence as the two looked at each other, something unreadable passing between them, before Syldor gave in with a small laugh. "Alright, Velora," he said, "you can be excused tomorrow."

Velora's excited response nearly upset the tray of food being served right behind her; Devana quickly reached a hand out to settle a plate before it fell, winking at the server before turning to take her half-full wine glass into her hand once again.

The first time they meet is at a college orientation for a school that Vex doesn't actually plan to attend. It's too high class for her, she thinks, and too focused on subjects she couldn't care less about. But she has to find somewhere, or at least pretend, and so she's here alone in the crowd of wide-eyed freshmen potentials, a plastic cup of some obscure juice in her hand as she eyes them all and tries to imagine herself belonging here.

Vex envies her brother- he refuses to attempt to mollify their father, refuses to make-believe some future at an uppity university. Somewhere, a universe exists where he is there with her now, nudging her elbow and laughing at the kid who just took a whole plate of cheese from the snack table.

(In that universe, she never meets Saundor.)

It's not always bad. It wasn't ever bad at first. He makes her laugh with his dry humor, his quick, sardonic quips whispered against her ear while she struggles to maintain composure in a crowded room. He kisses her sweetly, softly, harder when she asks. He plays her father like a well-tuned fiddle and mocks him with her behind closed doors; it is always like Saundor knows just want she wants to hear, what she needs to hear in each individual moment.

He thinks the idea of soulmates is stupid, a childish wish coming from insipid, romantic girls.

"So, Percival, what is it that you do for a living?" Devana asked, leaning back a little as a steaming plate of something breaded was set down in front of her.

"Uh, commission work, mostly." Vex could see him tense, could see his breath catch as he realized he was being directly addressed, but his voice was steady. Steadier than hers would have been, had she been in his seat. (What an odd, terrible blessing, to have no potential in-laws to meet.) "I specialize in creating and modifying personal computers, typically, though I do get the odd request for decorative pieces or theater prop work."

"He makes really neat things," she added, realizing belatedly as her words fell flat how dumb they sounded.

"I try to, at least." He turned and flashed her a small smile, which she returned. From across the table, Velora made a tiny sound of disgust. Vex stuck the tip of her tongue out at her sister, who gladly returned the gesture.

"Manners, ladies," came the monotonous order from their father, which spurred an instinctual 'sorry dad' from both of them that had Vex grimacing mentally at herself. Almost 28 years old now, and she still jumped at his command. Jesus fuck.

(If Vax were here, he'd lean over, whispering softly into her ear, "Manners, ladies," until she elbowed him away. But it'd make her laugh, and chase the creeping inadequacy out of her skull. God, she wished he was here.)

Devana, wine glass empty and set aside, raised her eyebrows. "Does that make much money?"

"Sometimes," Percy replied, and in any other setting Vex would have laughed. Most of his work did sell for high prices, but he often cared little about his sourcing and would spend hours making sure everything met his sky-high standards. If you were talking labor and parts, most of his projects dragged him into the red. Vex had subtly (and then not-subtly) left notebooks and prepared spreadsheets for him, just so he could see where his money was going. He tried to humor her, usually, but too often she found them half-abandoned under stacks of other papers.

"Are you going to school, Percival?" asked her father. He was gently cutting his meat into pieces, his eyes on his plate, but Vex knew it wasn't an innocent question.

"Not currently, no."

"Do you-"

"Is it really necessary to give him the third degree at dinner?" Vex interrupted, blood hot and voice sharp. Sharper than she'd intended, but not nearly as sharp as she felt. How dare he have the gall to look surprised at her outburst? Question after question, meant to sound innocent- but she knew each of them was nothing more than a subtle dig at her choices.

"I don't mind, Vex." Percy reached over and touched her elbow, gently, and it took strength to resist shaking him away. He didn't mind because he didn't understand.

"I won't sit here and have this conversation." She didn't know if the meat on her plate was chicken or fish or pork, and she'd happily let it go cold before she found out. Her hands shook, her jaw ached, and she could not remember feeling so angry in so long. If Vax were here- god, if Vax were here.

Her father- fucking Syldor- laid his knife against the napkin and looked at her, really looked, his eyebrows wrinkling together over his nose, mouth tight before he spoke calmly, like a rider trying to whisper down a spooked mare. "Vex'ahlia. I am making an effort to try and get to know your new boyfriend."

Her mouth felt dry. "He has money," she said weakly, trying to avoid looking at Velora's shocked, wide eyes. Percy's concerned, digging gaze wasn't much better; she stared over Syldor's shoulder, back tense, trying to ignore his prying fingers on her arm.

"Oh, hun," said Devana softly, leaning forward and giving Vex a sympathetic look that drew bile towards the back of her throat. "We aren't trying to make this a contest."

"We wouldn't-" Syldor cleared his throat, pursing his lips as he tried to decide on the right words. "We are not trying to compare him to Saundor."

"He's not the same," Vex insists, mad now that he knew what she was thinking, mad that her fucking ex could still spend so much time at the forefront of her mind.

She glanced at Devana for a second, who said quietly, "We know."

"You loved him. You thought he was great," she accused her father, who met her head on with a slow nod. After everything, and he couldn't even deny it.

"I made a mistake," he said, "I convinced you not to drop the wedding until it was almost too late, and-"

"Forced me," she growled- or she tried to growl, but she heard only a whisper. "Non-refundable deposits, you said."

"Vex'ahlia."

In the silence pause that followed her name, she felt Percy withdraw his hand. She still couldn't bear to look at him. Merry Christmas Eve, Percy. Have a first row seat to a dramatic family scene. She stared down at the cold food in front of her, violently ill at the thought of eating now. "May I be excused?" she asked, and without waiting she shoved her chair backwards.

"Vex'ahlia," Syldor said again, and she stood, looking at him, daring him to say she couldn't leave the table. "I'm sorry," he said, and she swallowed hard. "I never said it, because I did not imagine that you would have wanted me to. But I'm sorry, and I apologize. And you may be excused."

Waiting as his gaze falls across her collarbone, she tries to convince herself that she can read regret in the lines of his face, that there might be the breath of an apology hovering between his lips. His expression is familiar, and her heart skips when she does finally recognize it for what it is: this face, this ardent expression- this is the way he looks at her in the morning after a quick fuck, when his teeth have caught her hard enough to leave blooms of purple, when he's left a dark hickey behind her jaw. In a moment, Vex understands. There's no regret here. She crushes rose-colored glasses under her heel and stops looking for emotions she doubts he knows, reading instead contempt in a single raised eyebrow, pride in the subtle crook of his thin lips.

She'd thought she'd wear this low cut shirt and shock him, prove something to him by making sure he knew what he'd done. It hadn't worked, and embarrassment heats her cheeks. She wants to yank her shirt up, pull a sweater on. Confess a sudden chill and cover up.

She doesn't, because that would be conceding something.

Later, of course, he will apologize, his lips gently warm upon the bruise as he whispers the word 'sorry' until she believes it. He kisses her, and it feels real, so she tries to forgive the way he covets her marks.

Vex slammed the door shut behind her hard enough to shake the frame (but if that frame was going to break, it would have done so years ago) and threw herself on the bed like a six year old who'd just been told she couldn't have ice cream. She felt just as stupid, too. She'd let herself get so worked up, over what? Nothing? A few questions that really could have been nothing? What else would the Vessars even know to ask about, besides money? Seeing him again had just- she'd panicked, and caused a scene in front of Velora, god, her little sister who didn't know anything about her ex. Fucking mess.

And Syldor had- how dare he. How fucking dare he--

She pressed her face hard into the pillow, breathing in dust and laundry soap, trying not to cry. The door clicked open, and then softly clicked shut again. Vex didn't bother look up when somebody sat next to her on the bed, shifting her body as the mattress dipped. She knew it was Percy. She knew it was him but she didn't know what to say to him. She felt embarrassed, hot with shame- she hadn't even told him she'd been engaged once, and she knew he wouldn't care, because he was good, but she felt like he should. He should yell at her for keeping secrets, and for involving him in a family scene, and for making him spend the holiday away from the only family he had left-

Gently, he placed a hand on her back. "Vex?"

She grunted, not lifting her head from the pillow, and he started moving his hand, rubbing her back in slow, rythmic motions until she sighed and sat up, still clutching the pillow to her chest. "Sorry," she said, rubbing her palm against an eye that definitely wasn't wet. She certainly wasn't crying.

"Sorry for what?"

"You don't have to pretend." If she sniffled, he pretended not to hear it. "I might be a bit- I feel broken, sometimes," she admitted, shifting until she can lean against his shoulder.

"Fitting," Percy said, lifting his hand from her back to tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. It'd mostly grown back, now, and looked just like it always had when she braided it, except for the shorter strands that often escaped. "I'm a bit cracked myself."

Vex chuckled, a small laugh. "Cracked."

"Shattered. Split. Bit damaged." Percy leaned closer and kissed her cheek, just a small peck against hot skin before pulling back. "Like a fucking mess."

"We do fit," she agreed, running a hand over her forehead (and dislodging the bit of hair he'd nestled away, and more besides). The bed creaked then as Percy rose suddenly, and she watched as he started rooting around through the suitcase. She had packed it, which meant it was a mess- but apparently he'd stashed something in there when she wasn't looking, because when he returned to his spot on the bed, he pushed a small wrapped package into her hands. "What is this?" she asked, hesitating.

"Merry Christmas."

"Percy, first, it's not Christmas-"

"I know."

"And, second, we said we weren't going to buy any gifts this year-"

"I know," he repeated. "Technically, I didn't buy it." Vex turned and gave him a look, her finger idly toying with the blue ribbon tied around the box. "Just open it," he insisted.

Vex sighed, and pulled the ribbon loose, letting it flutter across her lap. It was wrapped in a shiny silver wrapping, very neatly, and she ccould tell that he had spent way too long making the lines as even as they were. Under the paper was a dark box, velvet to the touch, and she turned to give him another look. "This had better not be jewelry," she told him, her fingers paused on the lid.

"Open it and see."

She lifted the lid off and then let it drop to the floor, her eyes growing wide. "Percival," she whispered softly, taking the object from the box carefully. It was a familiar silver hairpiece, set with three pristine blue feathers.

"I fixed it," he explained as she turned it over in her hands. "I had to replace the feathers completely, and unfortunately they are just faux blue feathers now. But I untwisted the metal, so it should be good as new."

Vex found herself suddenly speechless, her mouth hung open. It was- she had never expected to see it again. She had convinced herself Percy had thrown it away, and she hadn't bothered to ask him about it. The silver hairpiece was the very last thing she had expected to get back. She looked up at Percy, and realized she was leaving him hanging for a response. "Percy. I can't believe this."

"I'm hoping that's a good response, but I'd be happy to break it again if you hate it." He tried to joke, but she could hear the waver in his voice as he waited to see if it was going over well.

"It's perfect," she told him, and then again, "It's perfect."

"Merry Christmas," he told her, grinning, and she leaned forward to kiss that grin solidly off his face. The pillow and the empty box tumbled to the floor as he pulled her close, her empty hand clutching the edge of his jacket while her other protected the gift.

If they never left the room again that night, nobody thought to blame them.

A normal relationship ends in tears and ice cream and close friends banding towards one side or the other.

Hers ends in blood.

Vex doesn't entirely remember what the argument is about. Maybe she's mad that he's shown up unexpectedly at her work and expects her full attention. Maybe he's still pissed about the dog she brought home last week, covered in stitches and peeing on the floor. It's the culmination of a failing relationship that she doesn't know how to escape. Failing. Failed. Doomed from the start. He's barely human- she'll listen to his heart at night and think it sounds empty. Empty like his sugar sweet promises, made over and over and over-

He speaks, and she yells, and he yells back. She calls him 'Sandy' just because it drives him crazy. He grabs her arm and holds tight, and she's terrified but not worried, because though the park is empty they are in public, and he's never done anything to her in public. There's a point where she doesn't even know what she's shouting about anymore, she's yelling just to yell. She tells him it's over (she's told him this before, so many times, and she's meant it before but this time she really means it, she swears). She fights out of his grip and pulls her ring off, dragging it from her finger even as the metal bites. She throws it out into the grass, and they both go silent, staring, chests heaving, she dares him with a wide-eyed look to argue.

He takes her up on that dare.

He doesn't speak, but he grabs her, both wrists this time, turning her away and pressing her against the picnic table. She fights but he's a full head taller than her, and stronger, and she feels points of ancient splinters dig through her pants into the front of her thighs. Hair tears from her scalp like stars of pain as he pushes her face into the wood, her hands scrabbling against old, chipped paint as she tries to push back. She smells wood and sticky, rotted food and thinks "I need to wash this table," which is an inane thought in the moment, a distraction, a focus that isn't-

Saundor is taken down by a sudden force and she goes down too, one knee knocking against the edge of a seat and sending pain shooting through her entire leg as she falls into the dirt. Vex reaches for the table and tries to pull herself up, disoriented, her leg giving out against the loose dirt.

"I'll fucking kill you!"

When she turns, the scene runs in slow motion, her brain processing like molasses- her brother is there, suddenly there out of nowhere, piled on top of Saundor in the grass with an expression of fury fierce enough to shake even Vex. She sees her own hand reach out unbidden, words on her lips-

and then suddenly there is blood and everything is moving at full speed again. Somebody has a knife (who the fuck carries a knife? does her brother? does her fiance carry a blade?) and quickly it goes flying, but not before blood splashes across Saundor's face, not before a stripe of cartoonish red crests across Vax's palm.

Dogs and humans have the same color blood, Vex thinks, frozen.

Sirens ring.

Vex woke up to the shrill sound of her phone going off, and groaned loudly. She debated not answering, but nobody called her unless it was important, so she kicked the blankets off, pushed Percy's arm away, and dug her phone out of her purse. "Hello?" she asked groggily, slipping back into the warm bed.

"Merry Christmas!" her brother shouted, and despite her irritation she couldn't help but smile.

"Merry Christmas," she replied, ignoring Percy's incomprehensible grumbling next to her. "You're up early."

"Six gremlins decided that I only needed to sleep as long as the sun did." Small giggles burst through the background like static in Vax's cheap phone, and Vex winced. "I can't even tell them apart."

"I forgot that Keyleth had so much family," Vex said, twisting her cold feet between Percy's legs until he started pushing her off.

"There are a million people in this house and I can't tell half of them apart," Vax confirmed. "They all have weird names that I can't remember."

Vex paused to kiss Percy's shoulder before answering. "Vax, we have weird names."

"At least we shorten them! Kid, what's your name?"

Vex heard a tiny voice answer, "Ellalen."

"I'm calling you Ellie," Vax told them, which earned him a shrill complaint. "Alright, alright, alright, sheesh," he replied, and Vex laughed.

"I'm glad you're having fun," she said.

"You too?"

"Yeah," she confirmed. If she told him about last night's dinner, he'd happily bitch about it with her. He'd be glad to assure her that she wasn't crazy, and that dad had really been trying to be an ass- and on another day, that might have been good for her. On Christmas, though, she was going to let herself be happy. "Tell Keyleth I said hi, yeah?"

"Yeah. Tell Percy the same."

Percy grumbled his own reply into the pillows, but Vex couldn't even begin to decipher it. She patted him through the blanket. "Love you, Vax."

"Love you more, sis."

She hung up, leaving him trapped under a pile of Keyleth's relations, and ducked back underneath the covers to snuggle again with Percy. He gladly tucked his arm around her, pulling her tight. "Merry Christmas," she told him.

He lifted his head and blinked wearily at her. "Go back to sleep," Percy said, rolling his eyes when she kissed him and then laughed.

Later, she'll curl up in bed with her snorting puppy and think of every chance she had to cut things off before it all went to hell. A million and one chances, choices made- a million and one alternate universes. Vax sits in the kitchen on the phone with their cheap, shitty lawyer. The Vessar family has a host of lawyers on staff, as close friends, and any of them would have been more than happy to represent one of his woe-begone children in court; but they'd never ask dad for a favor, sure he'd never grant them one.

Vax'ildan will go to jail, and she'll be left truly alone this time (this time, she's the one waiting for him). It will be her, and a dog who gets bigger every day, eating more and more, and an apartment she'll struggle to pay for alone.

Eventually, it's just her and the dog and a car that was paid off years ago. Park management lets her sleep parked behind the closed gates after she makes a convincing argument that it would benefit security to have an employee on the premises 24/7. If they pity her, they are kind enough not to say so. She works as many hours as they can pay her, the last Trinket she owns at her side, and saves and saves and waits.

When he gets out on parole, the shadows under his eyes nearly as dark as hers, they can finally start over.

A slew of texts from Cassandra were waiting for them when they finally got up, a series of 'thank you!' and 'Is this for real?' and a picture of the black Persian sitting in the empty paper they had wrapped her gift with. It had been Vex's idea, and she had mostly been joking when she suggested it, but Percy had thought it was perfect- a pair of framed pedigrees for her spoiled cats, printed on paper watermarked with the de Rolo family crest.

Velora had demanded her present as soon as they dressed and found her sitting in front of the elaborate Vessar tree, already surrounded by ribbons and torn paper and a variety of boxes. They'd let Cassandra shop for her, and Vex really didn't understand what was so exciting about a box of make-up, but her sister had squealed when she'd revealed the label, so it must have been an okay gift. Velora hugged her solidly, and after Vex reminded her that it was a gift from Percy too, hesitated only a second before offering him a hug as well. Vex dearly wished she had her camera ready to catch the moment, because it was a hideously awkward hug between two strangers.

"I like your hair," Velora told him shyly, breaking the hug and stepping away.

"Thank you."

"What kind of dye is that? It's very well done."

"It's natural," he told her.

Her eyes went big and she blurted, "Bullshit!" before clapping her hand over her mouth and glancing around the room for her mother.

Vex giggled. "Really, I promise," she told her, backing Percy up.

"Sure," Velora said, eyeing Percy in a way that absolutely did not say 'sure'. "And Santa Claus is real too."

"He is real!" gasped Vex, drawing a hand to her mouth in a fake, obnoxious gasp. Vel was unamused, but Percy chuckled, so Vex counted that as a win. "Let's sneak you outside before mom comes back," she said. "I haven't played in the snow in ages."

It turned out that snow was a lot less pleasant than she remembered. It was cold and wet and, though the snow across the lawn looked stunning, it was too fluffy to do much with. Snowballs fell apart mid-air, and their attempt at a snowman ended up just a mound of snow that wouldn't stick. Vex stood, surveying the glittering snow, her fingers freezing in cotton gloves. "Tell dad to build a sledding hill," she told Velora.

Her sister was looking grumpy in a fashionable coat that didn't hold any heat in, her hands tucked into her armpits. "I tried to get him to build me a basketball court, but he didn't want to."

"Do you even play basketball?"

"I could start if we had a court!"

Vex laughed, the cold air stinging the back of her throat. "Percy," she called, turning to see him still trying to figure out how to make the snow form a man, "did you ever play basketball?"

"What is that?" he asked, finally standing, kicking the mound of snow, "Some kind of sport?"

"God, I love you," Vex laughed, raising her fingers to her warm breath and rubbing them together, trying to warm them.

(If she noticed Percy stiffen, blinking behind snowy glasses and staring at her, it could probably just be blamed on the cold.)

When they finally went inside, tracking snow over into the clean entranceway, Devana was waiting with cocoa. It was straight from the Keurig, and made with water, but it was warm and she'd been kind enough to have it waiting.

## Afterword

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